Blood Runs Cold
by L0ve1sDead
Summary: Steve and Bucky are back from Wakanda for mandatory training. Then, Tony and the team are taken by surprise when a new person arrives, seemingly from the dead. They are even more surprised when Stark tells them its his...daughter? Nobody, however, is in as much shock as Bucky. So how well do you really know the people around you? Rated M for adult content. Seriously read w/ caution
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Sorry it' so late, but I'm back after 2 some odd years. I was fighting for my freedom, jk, I just graduated high school in 2016 and started college. Oh, AND I had a baby! Without further ado (a story that does not pertain to the other ones I have written, albeit same characters, let's call this an updated rewrite) I present…**

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 **Blood Runs Cold**

 **1 Year Before Thanos**

It was dark when they landed, the lights from the Quinjet quickly illuminated the landing pad and cold air rushed into the jet as the door opened downward. It was a familiar cool to Bucky, not exactly _cold_ like Siberia. The lack of moisture in the air is what threw him off the most though. After spending so much time in a warm, humid, African country, the sudden change in climate was uncomfortable.

"Remember what we talked about?" Cap grabbed his shield and bag of equipment off of the chair.

"Yeah…" Bucky sighed. "Keep to myself, obey every order, answer 'yes sir, no sir."

"Not exactly." Cap chuckled. Bucky loved the sound of his laughter so much he smiled himself. "I said avoid conflict as much as possible. This is _his_ facility which means he can kick us out whenever he wants."

"Why are we even here, Steve?" Bucky grabbed his bag and put his hair up in a bun.

Steve sucked some cool air in, "He's been having these nightmares. He wants us-well _me_ to help get everyone in order just in case something happens. Thor has been going on about some 'magic power stones' and due to recent events, it just seems like a good idea."

"Magic power stones?" Bucky slung his bag over his shoulder as the two made their exit from the jet.

Cap sighed, "I don't know Buck, this is all beyond my understanding."

"So what do I do if he tries to start something with me?" Bucky saw Tony approaching them with Thor, Natasha, and Sam.

Steve looked over at his friend and grinned, "You diffuse it."

Bucky snorted softly and smiled, sensing the slight sarcasm.* "Ok then."

"Hey there Barnes, who's the blonde?" Stark quipped.

"Ha ha." Steve blurted as stepped off the landing pad, he shook Tony's hand. The super soldier's hair was long, it was going to take a while before everyone got used to it.

Bucky followed and did the same. He must have seemed apprehensive because Tony turned to him and said, "Look, I know we've had our…differences. Yeah, maybe we tried to kill each other a couple of times. It happens." Sam shook his head slightly and looked at the ground, almost like he wanted to hit Tony.

Bucky pursed his lips inward for a moment "It's in the past. I'm ready to move on." He realized that his words sounded cold, but he meant them. He was tired of the tension in Steve's voice whenever he talked about Tony or about the incident or even about _before_ the incident. Bucky knew it had been tearing Steve up.

Tony nodded slightly, almost like he was expecting something more. "Me too. Let's get you guys moved in, it's late." He set off for the facility. Natasha hugged them both and set off after Tony, Thor and Sam offered handshakes and pats on the back. It was the first time Bucky had even met Thor.

"Where's the rest of the team?" Steve asked.

"Asleep." Thor answered.

"Or drunk." Sam sighed. "Banner has been doing a lot of that lately since…what do you call it Thor?"

"Ragnarok, Asgard was destroyed, my people are on a planet that is providing temporary aide until we can find a home." Thor sounded defeated.

"I'm sorry." Steve grabbed his arm and squeezed it to comfort him.

As they entered the facility a rush of cold air (even colder than outside) hit them in the face. "Who the fuck turned the air conditioning on?" Sam shivered and rubbed his arms.

"Language." Steve chimed in.

"I did." Stark echoed from ahead, "Keeps the overnight remodeling team awake. I do it every night, you guys are just asleep by now."

"That's stupid." Natasha muttered. It was 2:18 in the morning.

"Barnes, Rogers." Stark waited for them to catch up to him. "Your sleeping quarters are down there labeled H, for Barnes, I for Rogers."

" _How convenient, H."_ Bucky thought, he wondered if Tony did that on purpose. It would haunt him forever, he knew. He wished that letter would be erased from the English dictionary.

"Um, Mr. Stark I heard a noise that sounded like-." A teenage boy, eating a bag of pretzels stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Steve, but when he saw Bucky his face drained of color "Oh shit."

"Watch your mouth." Steve scolded.

"Y-yes sir. I'm sorry." He stuttered. "Mr. Stark, I thought I heard like a helicopter but it must have been them. I'm so sorry for interrupting. Hey weren't you just talking about how much you-."

"Parker, it's late. Get to bed." Tony commanded.

"He missed you." Peter loud whispered to Steve. "Like cries about it at night missed you."

"Parker, you're grounded from the suit!" Tony raised his voice, "you'll train without it tomorr-today."

"Aww but whyyy?" Peter groaned, "It's ok to have a man crush." Sam did his best to keep from laughing, the joke bounced right off of Thor, Natasha ran a hand through her hair in irritation, and Bucky was unsure how he felt about this supposed 'man crush' on _his_ best friend.

"Peter, it's bed time. We have an intense day ahead of us. Get some rest." She stated, almost like she was talking to a child.

"Yes ma'am." He shoved the rest of the pretzels in his mouth and took off the opposite direction. He quickly spun back around walking backward. "Oh, Captain," He began with his mouth half full. "I'm in room L." Peter crinkled the bag and shoved it into his hoodie pocket as he spun back around and headed for his room.

"Who's the new kid?" Bucky asked.

"You don't remember him from the parking lot?" Natasha chimed in.

"Was it the guy who got really big?" He looked over at Steve.

"No." Natasha chimed in. "That was Scott Lang."

"Oh, the other guy in a red suit, the one that took Steve's shield." He stated

"Bingo." Sam gave him a pat on the back. "He's only 16."

"Christ, why are we recruiting kids that young?" Bucky thought back to how little Steve was at that age.

"You weren't that much older when you joined the war." Steve told him. "And you didn't have special abilities. This kid does. He was bit by a radioactive spider."

It was true. Bucky wasn't much older.

"I was but a boy when I beheaded my first beast." Thor laughed proudly. "I think I was the earth equivalent of 10 years old." Silence.

"Ok, we can catch up tomorrow. Let's all just get to bed." Tony told them, kind of flustered. "That kid will be the death of me." He said under his breath.

"Alright then, goodnight everyone." Sam headed off down the opposite hall.

"Sleep well, friends," Thor followed Sam down the hall. Bucky found it strange that he and Thor just met but he was already being called 'friend.' People here get way too comfortable with each other.

"Let's go guys, I'm in room J. Right next to you Steve." Natasha ushered them down their hall. "You know, Peter wasn't exactly lying." She turned to Steve as they walked. "That fight shattered him. He's been an emotional wreck ever since."

"Well I haven't exactly been chipper about it either," Steve confessed. "I've had some down days."

"He loves you, you know." She stated.

"I know." Steve replied. "I love him too."

Bucky was getting uncomfortable. He was unsure if Steve meant love as in like brothers, because he himself loved Steve like a brother, or in the romantic sense. Cap really hadn't been much into women after that short fling with Sharon, but then again, he hadn't exactly been _around_ a lot of women.

"Night Steve, Goodnight Ms. Romanova." He nodded to them and disappeared into his room. The door closed and blocked out all noise. The sudden silence made his ears ring. "Are these rooms soundproof?" He asked himself.

"Welcome to your sleeping quarters! Now with new soundproofing software." A friendly voice echoed from above. Bucky nearly jumped out of his skin.

"Who is that?" He demanded, reaching for his gun in his bag.

"My name is FRIDAY I am your virtual assistant." The voice chimed. "I can disable the soundproofing software to make you more comfortable."

Bucky sighed in profound relief and then anger struck. "No need. Fucking Tony. Could've warned us."

"There is no need to use your personal weapon. I have an arsenal stocked and ready for your use anytime." The wall behind his bed slid up and revealed 6 different types of semi-automatic weapons as well as 3 different brands of pistols and one pump action shotgun. All ammo was at the bottom.

"Nice." A smile tugged at his lips. 'I'll sleep with that arsenal open if that's ok with you."

"Of course Mr. Barnes."

He slipped his loaded glock under his pillow and undressed to his underwear. He didn't feel tired but he felt himself drifting off as soon as his head hit the pillow.

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 ***Try saying that 5 times fast 'softly smiled sensing slight sarcasm'...yeesh alliteration.**

 **Hope you guys enjoyed! Feel free to leave reviews, just a friendly reminder if you have CONSTRUCTIVE criticism please be KIND about it. I've recently had someone be incredibly rude to me about something I wrote, it really ruins the whole experience for everyone when you leave nasty reviews. We are a community of writers who need to be uplifting and kind to one another. That being said, if you be a cunt to me I'll be nice the first couple of times but after that, no longer. Everyone have a fantastic day! Chapter 2 will be out soon!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N** **: Sorry it's been a couple of days, I'm working and between that, sleeping. I do all of my writing at night (only alone time I get between baby and boyfriend), I literally sleep between the hours of 6 am-2 pm sometimes. I am an insomniac; I've had it since pregnancy. This is a LONG chapter as I try to establish the atmosphere of the facility, and then of course there's Peter's non-stop nonsense with Bucky ;)**

 **I NEED A BETA READER. Pm me if interested. You have to be VERY well versed in the MCU.**

 **AUTHORS FUN FACT** **: If any of you are curious about some soundtracks running as I write, (some can't work with music but I can!) Check out CHVRCHES (Get out, Never Say Die) and Phantogram (Don't move, Cruel World) to name a few. Moving songs. I also love synthpop and alternative/grunge bands (21 Pilots, Muse, MGMT, NIN, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, M83)**

 **Iconic Vine of the day: **Guy gets slapped** "Ah fuck! I can't belive you've done this!"**

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A loud knock on the door jolted Bucky from sleep. "Fuck," He sat up stiff as ever. He wasn't used to this much padding in a mattress. "What time is it?" He was really talking to himself but FRIDAY answered.

"It is 8:18 Mr. Barnes."

The knock came again. "Come in." He stood up and threw some pants on.

"Hey, Buck. Breakfast starts in a little while." Steve told him. "Sleep well?"

Bucky couldn't remember anything other than waking up. "Guess so."

"Why is that gun safe open?" A head popped in. It was Parker. "Man, you really _are_ an assassin." He waltzed on in, much to Bucky's dislike. "Oh dang! Is that your combat knife!?" Parker snatched it off of the dresser across from the bed. "Is this the one you tried to kill Steve with? Badass!"

"Parker, come on." Steve pointed his head to the kitchen area, he looked solemn. "Leave him alone."

Peter's face drained of color again when Bucky made eye contact with him. Bucky wondered just how terrified Peter really was of him. The sick part of him was pleased by that, the human part, what little of that he felt had left, was saddened.

"Yes sir, I'm coming. Uh-Mr. Barnes, can I call you that? I'm really sorry, sometimes I let myself get too touchy with things." Peter gently placed the knife on the dresser. He left quickly and quietly.

"Buck, he's just an…excited kid." Steve explained to him. "He's not trying to get into your business."

"I get it." Bucky stood up and put a dark T-shirt on. He didn't get it. "Are you sure I should go to breakfast, everyone kind of hates me. Especially Sam."

"Nobody hates you, Buck. They just need to…find where you fit in." Steve reassured him.

"Yeah that's just it. I don't _fit in_ anywhere." Bucky scoffed. "Fine, but you have to sit right next to me and bring your shield." Shuri had made him a temporary shield, even painted for him, just for the training. He stood up, grabbed his knife from the dresser and his glock from under his pillow.

Steve smiled at the ground, remembering how prepared he always was when they were teenagers. "Deal."

Breakfast was unusually quiet, that was, until Banner stumbled into the room. "Tony, I need egg yolks. This hangover is killing me."

Thor chuckled, a deep thunderous sound. He loved how Midgardians couldn't hold their alcohol.

Tony sighed and prepped the blender on the counter. "Banner, this drinking has to stop."

"Why?" He shot back, almost angrily. "I'm not training with you guys, I'd kill all of you."

"Almost all." Thor corrected. "I beat you on Sakaar."

"No you didn't, I-he," Banner corrected. "went easy on you."

Confused looks were given to the pair.

"It's a long story." Thor sighed. "I'd rather not say anything for Banner's sake. I don't want to trigger an outburst."

The blender whirred and Bucky poked at his food. He would _never_ understand the dynamics of this team if the team couldn't even figure each other out in the first place. He was extremely unsettled. Banner downed the drink as soon as Toy poured it.

"I can't believe you're actually drinking that." Natasha heaved in a breath. "That even makes me nauseous."

"It's the only thing that woks, Nat." Bruce stated.

Bucky had never heard of drinking egg yolks to cure a hangover. The serum made it hard for him to even get drunk. He hadn't had one since-. Ceramic shattered and everyone spun around. It was, yep, Peter. He had broken an old vase next to couch on an end table. "Holy shit." He put a hand over his mouth "Sorry for my language Captain Rogers. I'm so sorry Mr. Stark. I thought that vase was glued to the table."

Sam started shaking his head in disbelief, or was it disappointment? Maybe both.

"Peter, why would a vase be glued to the end table?" Natasha asked, generally unamused.

"Well I mean, it's just so still all the time, I've never seen anyone pick it up, and it hasn't moved an inch since I've been here. It doesn't look particularly heavy so I thought maybe it was glued to the table like how some people bolt their dressers to the ground so their kids can't pull it over on themselves. So I didn't think I needed to be too careful around it. I just bumped into it."

"Why would a vase move on its own?" Sam put his hands together under his chin.

Tony kind of nodded, acknowledging the thought process. "I got that in Beijing. It was over a thousand years old."

"Fuck." Peter muttered under his breath. "Am I kicked out of training for this, I mean, I already can't use my suit."

"No, you're still training without it." Tony informed it.

"Why can't he use his suit?" Vision asked.

"I'm grounded." Peter replied. "I accused Mr. Stark of having a man crush on Steve last night."

Wanda laughed.

"Do you know when to shut up?" Bucky snapped at him. Peter look momentarily hurt. "Nobody has a 'man crush' on anyone, grow up."

"Buck, it's fine." Steve put a hand on his shoulder briefly.

"Sounds like somebody's jealous." Peter shot back at him, he thought he was being quiet.

"What the fuck did you just say?" The Winter Soldier glared daggers at him. He stood up and began approaching the boy.

"Please with the language." Cap begged. "We're not sailors, come on guys."

"You mean we're not the Marines." Sam interjected.

Col. Rhodes laughed, he was on the other end of the room on the computer, filling out paperwork. Bucky didn't even notice he was there.

Peter gulped when he saw the gun on Bucky's hip. "Oh my god please don't kill me. I'm sorry." The teen put his hands up. "Mr. Stark please don't let him kill me."

"Barnes sit down." Natasha warned. "Why'd you bring that in here, you don't need it."

Steve caught Natasha's eye, silently explaining the trust issues Bucky had with the team.

"I'm going to the bathroom, Romanoff." He corrected. Bucky didn't take his eyes off the kid until he passed by him.

Bucky made it to the toilet just in time to vomit up his stomach contents. In Wakanda, he ate only fruit for breakfast and slowly increased his carbohydrate intake throughout the day. He wasn't used to heavy breakfasts like these. He slumped down by the toilet. Why did he agree to come to this? He came to the conclusion that he didn't want to be anywhere away from Steve, but he knew he couldn't follow him around for the rest of their lives. He had to be a separate person from Steve, but he didn't know who he was, he just knew that Steve made him feel like…somebody.

Training took place at 9 am.

"Do I have to do this?" Barnes asked Steve. They were in the massive stadium size training room on the northwest side of the facility.

Tony came up behind them. "Barnes you can sit out today and watch if you'd like. You don't have to participate in anything you don't want to. I know you're new," Stark typed on the phone, Steve noticed it was to Pepper. "And I want you to train when you're comfortable in your surroundings. I know that can take a while."

Bucky scanned Tony's eyes for sincerity, and when they made eye contact, the sincerity was confirmed. "Thank you for considering that." Bucky felt the heat of embarrassment crawling to his face.

The first task was counter combat. A dozen or so highly skilled individuals trained the newly formed team to use the attacker's skill and even weapons against them, without even hardly touching them and without using abilities. It was actually rather brilliant, Bucky gave his undivided attention and mentally made notes of every tactic being used and why. He had the defense down, but learned three new ways to grab somebody's knife or gun without either cutting yourself or setting it off. Peter spent most of the day eyeing Bucky to make sure he wasn't going to come after him. Bucky enjoyed glaring him down, he didn't like that kid. He didn't know why.

The second task around 2pm was crowd control and evacuation simulation. Steve and Natasha were the only ones who passed. Everyone had to retake it one or two times. Bucky never dealt with crowds, everyone he had dealt with were either in charge of him, or died in silence before him. Crowds in his book were only used to conceal yourself.

"Why are you idiots running that way?" Peter shouted during his second time taking the simulation, and when the crowd continued to go the wrong way he yelled, "Alright sheep, fine, run to your deaths for all I care."

Tony stopped the simulation right as Colonel Rhodes was laughing his ass off at Peter's comment.

"Peter, why would you say something like that?" Steve asked him.

"Man, I just feel like can't do any of this without my suit." Peter whined.

"Your suit isn't everything." Tony walked up behind him and, put his hands on the teen's shoulders and squeezed. "Believe me."

"Well you're rich and everyone knows you're Ironman, so you can do whatever you want without the suit." Peter argued. "I'm just a broke kid who's trying to keep his identity a secret."

Tony sighed, "Alright, training's done for today. It's already 6. We worked right through lunch and we _still_ didn't have time for diversion training. Everyone needs to wash up before dinner." Everyone started packing their things. "I mean actually shower." He clarified.

Bucky had been eating snacks provided by the staff all day, but he was actually starving. Steve had been checking on him all afternoon. It was the only time Bucky felt safe and comfortable. He wondered why he had this security complex around Steve. In his past life, it was the other way around.

Contrary to breakfast, everyone was loud at dinner. Either talking (Thor to Sam), laughing (Peter to whatever he was watching and showing Col. Rhodes), or throwing things at each other (Vision and Wanda with their napkins). Natasha probably had one shot of vodka too many and Bruce was dancing in the living room clearly intoxicated to music Bucky didn't recognize. All he knew was that it was _loud._ The Winter Soldier started to feel hot and uncomfortable. He had eaten two plates of roast beef already from the lack of iron and it was really starting to settle in. "Steve." He gently nudged his friend.

"Yeah." Steve turned to face him, a little upset that Bruce and Natasha were being so irresponsible with their alcohol.

"Can I sleep with you tonight, I'm just a little…on edge." Bucky admitted. He couldn't shake this feeling.

"Of course." Steve smiled softly at him. "You don't have to ask."

"Ha! I knew you were just jealous of Tony." Peter blurted out and then scolded himself for being so damn loud.

Bucky grabbed his knife and threw it at Peter, pinning his shirt to the nice wooden chair. The teen screamed. Bucky shot out of his chair and despite Steve's pleas not to do anything, grabbed the kid by the front of the shirt. "We're going to settle this now Parker."

"Barnes!" Tony shot up also. "Don't."

Steve caught up to his friend and grabbed his arm. "Buck, come on."

Peter had tears in his eyes.

"Oh now you're gonna cry? Not so manly after all, don't talk shit unless you want to get shit and I don't play nice." Bucky warned. "If I hear another word about this crap, there will be serious consequences and I promise nobody will be there to protect you."

"I'm sorry." He squeaked.

"Damn right you are." Bucky let go of his shirt and yanked his arm from Steve's grip. He stormed out of the kitchen. Steve went after him.

"Peter, he doesn't get your humor like we do." Col. Rhodes explained to him while removing the knife from his shirt. "He still sees everyone and everything as a threat. He doesn't know that he's safe. You can't be joking around like that, he doesn't understand."

"He's such a child." Peter wiped his eyes, angry that he would start crying like that.

"In a way, yes, he is." Natasha was stone cold sober at that moment. "He has to learn to trust all over again. Just like a child has to learn to trust the people around them."

"Well I don't 100% trust everyone and I'm not a dick to everyone." Peter argued.

"Yes but he was used as HYDRA's weapon, he was experimented on, tortured, pumped up with toxins and chemicals, I mean, he's got to reintegrate." Col. Rhodes dusted him off.

"I guess." Peter sniffed. "I'm going to bed, goodnight everyone."

"You ok Thor?" Natasha turned to the God. He had electricity forming around his hands.

"I'm good." He stated quickly, smiling with heat behind his eyes. "Just practicing self-control."

"Aren't we all." Tony hissed.

"Look. I know you guys want to kill him." Natasha took another shot; she was starting to slur. "But you can't, you'd lose Steve forever."

Tony knew this. He watched water swirl down the drain in the sink. He couldn't lose Steve again. The hourless, endless nights awake; shaking, drinking, crying, throwing up in the bathroom. The nightmares. He couldn't lose Steve.

Bucky escaped into his room shutting the door before Steve could enter. "Bucky, please open it. Come on, I'm not going to yell at you. I just wanna talk."

"Is that kid around?" Bucky asked from the other side.

"No," Steve peeked down the hall. "He's getting a talking to."

The door slid open, Steve sat beside him on the ground, he smelled like Irish Spring. "Buck, you've got to learn to ignore him. He's just trying to open you up a little, not get under your skin."

"I want to snap his spine like a toothpick." Bucky spat.

Cap had a soft look in his eyes. He put his arm around his friend. "Come here. FRIDAY close the door."

Bucky leaned into him a little. It was something they did while nobody was watching. Bucky was staring to respond to physical touch much better. Shuri had explained to Steve that once Buck got to the stage where he accepted touch, he needed to use that as much as possible to help him with the trauma. Bucky needed to be able to replace the hurt with gentle touches.

"I'm sorry." Bucky said to Steve. "I lost my temper."

"I know, you need to apologize to Peter though-"

"Fuck that little prick."

"Bucky if I have to say it again-"

"I'm sorry." Bucky sighed. "I know you hate cuss words."

"You want couch or bed?"

"I want to sleep with you, in bed." Bucky clarified.

Steve raised an eyebrow. "Bucky, remember what we talked about? I thought you just meant in the room."

"Not tonight, please. My anxiety is through the roof, I need you." He pleaded.

Steve couldn't say no, the tired, frightened look in his friend's eyes convinced him otherwise.

Steve laid quietly next to his friend. It was 2:57 in the morning, he couldn't sleep. He was thinking about the nights in Wakanda where Bucky wouldn't sleep for days, the nightmares plagued him so bad. He remembered that one night The Winter Soldier had been activated in Bucky's sleep. He had dreamed about the words. Steve woke up to find Bucky standing over him, a gun pointed in his face. _"You're my mission."_ Steve jumped up turned the light on and forced the gun upwards seconds before he would have been shot in the face.

" _Bucky, wake up!"_ Steve had yelled at him. He wouldn't, Bucky continued to attack Steve until Steve finally resorted to choking him unconscious, similar to the helicarrier incident. It broke his heart to have to do it.

An alarm went off in the hallway outside and in the room. It was probably the loudest alarm next to an air raid siren. Steve jumped, startled. Bucky shot up looking bewildered. "Shh, Buck its ok." Steve soothed him. "You're safe, I'm right here."

"What the hell is that?" Bucky sat up.

"Unidentified armed helicopter approaching the facility. T minus 5 minutes." FRIDAY informed.

"What?" Steve and Bucky got out of bed. Steve grabbed his shield, and Bucky grabbed his Skorpion on the ground by his feet. Both men threw a shirt on and prepared for the worst.

" _That semiautomatic minigun is the love of his life."_ Steve thought to himself as they both rushed out of the room, the other avengers were together at the end of the hallway.

"What is it?" Steve asked Tony.

"I don't know." Tony shook his head talking over the alarm looking at a tablet. "Its piloted by two men and it looks like there's a passenger."

"CAN WE TURN THAT OFF?" Bruce yelled.

'T-minus two minutes," FRIDAY chimed. "Lethal defense suggested. Grenade launchers detected"

"What?" Natasha shouted. "Are we going to shoot it out of the sky?"

"Why shoot it when I can pull it out of the sky myself." Wanda suggested.

"I can fly up there." Vision offered.

"No, I have a funny feeling about this one." Tony shook his head as he continued typing on the tablet. "FRIDAY defense override Stark, Anthony Edward."

"Override approved."

The alarm shut off. The team rushed outside into the cold morning air to see what was approaching. "Everyone be ready." Tony commanded. The staff had already surrounded and sealed the perimeter. Men with guns were everywhere, pointed at the helicopter that landed carefully on the pad.

The outside security lights beamed on the helicopter. It was silent for a moment. The door slid open and a young woman stepped out, with a backpack on. She had dark jeans, dark boots, and an NYU hoodie on. Her long hair was braided and fell on her left shoulder. "Hey dad."

"Tony who is that?" Natasha asked suspiciously. "And why did she call you dad?"

The whole team turned to look at him.

Tony's heart dropped out of him, his head was spinning. She went MIA three years ago. It didn't make any sense. He got the letters, the Air Force even showed up to his door. He mourned her, they'd never found a body, but her whole company was convinced she was dead.

Bucky's heart did the same and he retreated inside immediately, nobody noticed. He remembered that voice, what that brown hair felt like. He was instantly dizzy. There was no way, HYDRA had killed her, he was sure of it.

"That would be my daughter. First Lieutenant, Cypra Alise Stark."

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 **Next Chapter is going to be a whole lotta drama.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Ok, as an apology for being so late with Chapter 2, I've released this chapter early. Bear with me, OC and Bucky have a** _ **very**_ **complex background (that also fits the MCU timeline) and it's not all going to be explained in one chapter. Where would the fun in that be? Pronunciation is 'sigh-pra' Like a Cypress tree kind of. Thoughts and flashbacks will be in** _ **italics.**_

 **On another note, you guys are always welcome to PM/Email me for questions regarding your stories, my stories, or if you need me to look over something and give advice. No hate mail will be tolerated. (kawaiineko98channel at gmail dot com ) it is my commercial email, I will not be giving out my personal information in any way shape or form and while we can be colleagues, I do not make 'close friends' with anyone on this site. I keep it very professional. Reasons for that is that most of you, I would say, are under the legal age, and although I am a female, I still don't want anything to come off the wrong way. Thanks for everyone's understanding.**

 **Iconic vine of the day: Beyonce dancing: "Bring the beat in" **Girl with actual beet on a plate comes running** "Anything for you Beyonce!"**

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Tony's knees felt weak, like they were going to collapse on him as he approached her. It was surreal, and she was just… standing there. "Cy?"

"Hey," she smiled and sniffed slightly, trying not to get emotional. "can you call off the guns? The chopper may be armed but it's not loaded."

"Yeah, yeah." Tony said softly. He motioned to Cap, who called out to the security. All guns were lowered.

The woman wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into her. "I'm so sorry dad."

"Where have you been?" Tony felt a mix of emotions, first being joy, then confusion, then sadness, then anger. "Cypra." He ran some fingers down her braid, tears streaming down his face. He just couldn't believe it.

Cypra knew there was no way to explain it to him especially not the beginning of it all, it would be too much for him. Possibly even destroy their relationship.

"I-." She smiled and looked down, frustrated that it had to be this way. "It's really complex dad." She fumbled in her mind to tell him something…anything that wouldn't get her in trouble.

Tony sensed her shutting down already. "Ok," he surrendered. "I won't ask, I'm just in shock right now that you're even standing in front of me. I need a drink." He ran both hands through his hair. He looked back over at Steve. He noticed Bucky was gone. "Let's get you inside, it's cold." He wiped his cheeks quickly.

Cypra spoke some language to the pilots and waved, after grabbing her bag.

"Here, I got that." Tony picked it up out of her hands. "Come on."

"Is that Captain America?" Cypra half whispered as she kept up with Tony's fast pace. "I can't believe it, oh my god." She was a huge Captain America fan, even before they found him in the ice.

Tony half laughed, really trying not to cry this time as he remembered helping her with book report after book report each one more and more detailed and complex about Steve as the years went on. "Don't pass out."

She heaved in a breath, "Promise you'll catch me if I do."

Cypra's voice seemed to sing to him. Tony was having a really difficult time not passing out himself. His baby girl, he hadn't seen her in 5 years. The first two years she was on special ops, and then one day after Sokovia, he got the call. He remembered doing his damnedest to hide it from the team. He had concealed Cypra from the public all of her life to protect her. She and Pepper were his weaknesses; his enemies already knew about one. He couldn't give them another. He looked at this beautiful, physically fit, and pretty independent young woman. " _I did good."_ He thought to himself, she was 23 this year.

Steve stood out in front the others. "Tony, what the hell is going on? Why didn't you tell us you had a daughter?" Steve's eyes met Cypra's for the first time. Cypra's heart skipped a beat. She was so nervous. "First Lieutenant." He stuck his hand out.

"Captain." She shook his hand firmly and looked square into his bluish green eyes. "It's an honor."

"I didn't know Tony had an immediate child." He smiled. "I wish I had known this earlier I would've arranged for us to meet."

Cypra laughed nervously. "I was under the radar for a reason, sir."

"You don't have to call me sir, call me Steve." The super soldier assured her.

"I'll try." She adjusted her backpack on her shoulders, "After you're in service for so long, the formalities just…stick."

"Believe me, I understand that." Steve nodded like he was recalling a similar feeling.

Cypra pretended not to notice Thor as she nodded to the rest of the team. "This is unreal."

"Tell me about it." Natasha quipped. "If we all knew Tony Stark had a daughter…some of us would have behaved differently, huh Steve."

That stung.

Cypra looked confused for a moment. "Dad," She turned and spoke quietly to him. "if this is going to create problems with the team dynamics I don't have to be here. I can go with mom."

She still called Pepper mom.

"No." Tony was not willing to give her up. "You're fine. You have a lot to catch up on." He told her softly. "I have to prepare a room for you, do you mind sleeping in my room tonight?"

"I'd love to." She beamed. "I haven't slept over with you since I was a teenager."

"I remember those nights." He put a hand on her back gently. Some nights those were.

The facility was freezing; the air had kicked on. "Set heater to 74 degrees." Tony commanded. The A/C stopped and soon the vents were pumping out warm air.

"Finally." Sam sighed with relief.

Bucky stood against the wall cleaning his Skorpion.

"James?" Cypra blurted in utter disbelief.

Bucky looked up, it was like the whole world had frozen over. He couldn't say anything, he couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. Her hair, her eyes, her voice, her presence, the way she was standing. It slung him into the past.

" _How did you find me?" Bucky had her pinned to the ground after a lengthy knife fight that led to Cypra cutting him on the arm._

" _It's not hard." Cypra struggled beneath him. Her voice strained. "You go where HYDRA tells you, I have ears on them."_

 _He let her up just to grab her and slam her against the cold brick alley wall. She gasped as the wind as knocked out of her. His face was close to hers. Cypra noticed for the first time what beautiful eyes he had. "What do you know about HYDRA." His voice was cold._

" _I know you just escaped them. And I know they're going to send you after Steve Rogers next. Do you remember him? You were best friends." She remained calm, however, she was terrified. He could snap her neck at any given time, and she wasn't strong enough to overpower him, not when she was that scared, she couldn't._

 _Bucky blinked, the name sounded so familiar, he could almost pull the memory forward, but he had nothing. "Get away from me before I kill you." He released her._

" _Not going to happen." She insisted. "You need me and I need you. You think you can go AWOL on HYDRA forever? Did you hear what I said? I have ears on them, if they're coming, I'll know."_

 _Bucky knew he was out of options. She was right, he couldn't run forever. "Fuck." He muttered. "Fine, get your shit and let's go. We don't have a lot of time. Give me your knife, you're not to be trusted with that thing."_

 _Tony had made that combat knife specifically for her. She didn't want to give it up, but to earn his trust she knew she had to. "Fine, you scared I'm gonna nick you again? I'm almost as good as you, Barnes." She handed it to him and took off in the direction of her safe house, Bucky followed, confused and irritated at why she had just called him Barnes._

"Cypra." He approached the woman, as he got closer he could see the tiny freckles on her face. He instinctively grabbed her and pulled her into his chest, it was her scent that broke him. He did his best to conceal his emotion, but ultimately broke down crying on her shoulder, face buried into her neck.

Tears stung as they made it to Cypra's eyes. "James." She soothed. "It's ok." She grabbed a handful of that long brunette hair, trying her best to comfort him. She'd only seen him like this a few times, and each and every time it shattered her heart into pieces.

The team was in utter shock. Steve's neurons were firing as fast as they possibly could, trying to figure out how they knew each other.

Tony felt like he had died and gone to hell. He felt, betrayed. Why was that murderous, traitor to America touching _his_ daughter in such an intimate manner? "Cypra Alise." He began. He then realized that he hadn't at all forgiven Bucky.

"It's classified." She tried to steady her voice.

"Don't give me that."

"I promise, it was an op, dad, I can't talk about it." Cypra didn't tell him the whole truth, only part of it was an op. She was fucked, she had no clue he was here. Bucky let go of her angrily wiping tears from his face. "What the fuck, Barnes." Cypra was suddenly pissed. "Like what the actual fuck happened to you?"

"Language please." Is all Steve could think to say.

Tony was shaking with rage. "You know he killed my parents, Cy?"

She looked at him. "I didn't know until I was briefed prior to deployment dad."

"You knew this whole time." Tony felt breathless.

"What did you want me to do?" Cypra raised her voice. "I couldn't exactly call you and tell you. What part of a classified op do you not understand? If I told you that I could've been court marshaled. The whole operation itself was a matter of national security!"

"Really?" Tony asked. "Then why did you disappear? What really happened."

"Can't talk about it. I've said it for the umpteenth time." She stated.

She glanced at Bucky's arm. "How'd you lose the first one?"

Bucky clenched his jaw. He didn't want to get anyone in trouble, but Cypra could read him like a book.

"Cypra-."

"No, dad. Damnit I knew it was a mistake coming here." She shook her head. "What did you do to him?"

It was quiet.

"Alright then. Two can play at that game." She smiled. "I'm calling mom."

"No, don't. Cy, please. Don't. Pepper is under enough stress she doesn't need to be dragged into this." Tony pleaded. "Look, Barnes almost got us all killed or put in prison, ok?"

"You did that to yourself." Bucky countered. "I was framed, I told you."

"Well, we believe you…now." Tony stuck his chin up. "You know, actually, you should still be in prison yourself for all the murders you committed."

"That's enough." Steve demanded, he knew the look on Bucky's face. He couldn't take much more.

'And…how many _children_ were included in those Barnes?" Tony expelled a detail that most of the team didn't know about. "Innocent children."

Bucky just snapped, and before he knew it he had Stark by the throat, he threw the man across the room and Tony narrowly escaped hitting the wall. The suit was activated. Tony knew he should've killed that asshole as soon as he found out the demise of his parents.

"Dad!" Cypra yelled a warning. "James, seriously! Stop it."

They didn't listen. A massive fight broke out between the two and then Bucky resorted to deadly force and almost shot Tony square in the face; missed, and hit the wall behind them narrowly avoiding Peter. Cypra twisted his wrist, not an easy thing to do to a metal arm and snatched the gun out of his hands. Steve and Thor ended up ripping the two apart from one another while Bruce took deep breaths in and out, trying to calm himself.

"My life just literally flashed before my eyes." Peter stated and nodded. "So that's what that feels like."

"Peter I'm so sorry." Cypra apologized for Bucky.

"Nah its good, he's been such a dick to me since he got here I don't even mind anymore." The teen shrugged.

Cypra was furious. Furious at her dad for what he said to Bucky and furious with Bucky for lots of reasons. Steve was equally as angry. "Both of you. You're done seeing each other for the night."

"Show me the living room, I'll sleep on the couch." The young woman stated.

"Why?" Tony asked her, lifting the mask up.

"To ensure I don't get the urge to kill you in your sleep. That's why. Ублюдок."

Tony wondered where she had picked up Russian from.

Natasha sighed. "Мне жаль, что это Cypra, это не то, что мы думали.." (I'm sorry about this Cypra, this is not what we thought would happen)

"Пожалуйста, не извиняйтесь. Это я во всем виновата." (Please don't apologize, this is clearly my fault.) Cypra replied she smirked at the Black Widow.

Bucky knew it was actually his fault. He should have not reacted the way he did. He couldn't help it he had…missed her. He hadn't seen her in 3 years. He was shocked he even still remembered her, but then after what happened, how could he forget her?

"I'll show you the living room." Thor offered. Cypra followed behind him, wondering how everything could go so far south within 10 minutes of her return.

"And where did _you_ disappear to these last couple of months? I heard Asgard was destroyed. Are you ok?" Cypra questioned him as soon as they were out of earshot.

"I was going to ask you the same thing." Thor countered.

"I've been on Elvheim." She confessed. "Thor, I was so worried about you."

"I know." Thor pulled her into him. She had missed his embrace. "We've seen each other nearly every day for the last 3 years. It was weird not having you by my side." A smile tugged at the god's lips.

"I missed you too." She let him go.

"How do you know Barnes?"

"It was right before I met you." She told him.

"Is this what you were running from? Wait was he -."

"Yes." Cypra sighed. "He was."

"Cypra, you know if Tony finds out about this…" Thor spoke quietly.

"What he'll kill him? He's already tried apparently." She scoffed.

"Well yes, but, if he finds out you've been with me." He held her hands gently. Thor and Cypra weren't romantic, but they operated at a level of closeness that was rather unusual. It never progressed further than hugging or the occasional kiss to the hand.

"That's why we're going to hush about it, okay?" She shivered. "Damn, I'm still cold."

Thor found a blanket and wrapped it around her. "I'm in room R if you need anything." He rubbed her arms to warm her up, "Sleep well." He bid.

She never did, but when she dozed off, the memories jolted forward, like they'd been locked away forever.

" _This is the second time you've managed to burn water." Bucky lifted the pan off of the burner and dumped it into the sink._

 _Cypra laughed, "Hey, boiling water is my only weak spot. I can cook everything else."_

" _I know." Bucky put his hands on her waist. Cypra loved the coolness of his arm. "You're doing great." He reassured her, planting a kiss on her forehead. "You make a wonderful little housewife."_

 _She socked him the stomach playfully. "Not a housewife, James. Never will be, but if I don't feed you, you won't feed yourself."_

" _You know; I think you're the only person who's ever going to get away with calling me by my first name like that." He told her._

" _Good." She grinned. "That makes me special."_

* * *

Steve dragged Tony into the other hallway.

"What was all that about?" The super soldier snapped at him, blue eyes ablaze with fury. "Peter almost got shot."

Tony didn't have anything to say. He slid down the wall to a sitting position. He didn't want to cry, he was really trying not to. But when the tears spilled, he couldn't stop them.

Steve immediately changed his tone and sat next to his friend, who was clearly in a lot of pain. "Tony. I'm here for you."

"I needed you a long time ago." Tony told him.

"I know…I just-"

"It was a mistake, I get it." Tony lifted his head. "You don't have to explain."

"It wasn't a mistake." Steve looked over at him. "You weren't a mistake Tony."

"Then why'd you leave?"

"I needed time to reflect," Steve confessed. "and I needed time to heal myself. I had gone over the edge, I lost control with you and I'm sorry."

"I had a concussion after all that fighting and then when we-, I didn't know you'd leave so soon." He stopped. "I couldn't handle it. Simple as that, I calculated a risk and it didn't pay off."

"Tony," the soldier put a hand on his shoulder. "It happened. If I knew it was going to mess you up this bad…I'm sorry. I didn't know what I was thinking."

Tony felt sick, it was late, he was tired, sore and a little bloody from when Bucky got him in the side of his face. Thank goodness it was the nonmetal arm. "Goodnight Steve."

"Goodnight, Tony."

Tony slipped into his room and collapsed into bed. 10 minutes was all it took to screw it up yet again with his daughter. 10 minutes. And then Steve, oh Steve.

He pulled the knife out of his night stand. He was so, so over this.

* * *

 **Lots of mystery o.O Hope you guys enjoyed and again I'm sorry for the delay.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hey there this is a LONG chapter as I'm reciting history to clear possible confusion surrounding the OC , and also it's getting SUPER exhausting being an** **omniscient narrator because there are too many thoughts and emotions between the mess of characters I have to recreate and keep up with. This is why I am changing to subjective, you will no longer know the thoughts and emotions of i.e. Steve AND Bucky in the same chapter unless I switch characters, and that will be presented with a line across the page.** **Most of you have probably noticed Tony not really being the smartass he usually is, but you have to understand what a broken place he's in after Civil War. If you know the character, you will know that he loses some of his flair when his heart is broken. Take the MIT conference Tony held after he split with Pepper, he wasn't really being himself…enjoy**

 **Iconic vine of the day: "It's Wednesday my dudes... AAAAHHHHH"**

* * *

Bucky lay on his back staring up at the ceiling, fan whirring quietly from above. He felt high, like he was teetering between the realm of the present and the past.

 _Bucky held Cypra's hair back as she vomited into the toilet. She was pale, weak, and she suddenly became very picky about the menu for meals. No meat except red medium rare, no bananas, no oatmeal, nothing with too much sugar or salt. She stuck to eating rice and plain crackers. She had lost quite a bit of weight already. What kind of flu could she have possibly picked up and where? They'd been in the same place for almost 8 months. Whatever virus the 21_ _st_ _Century forged while he was in cryostasis was a nasty one._

 _Cypra sat back on the ground, breathing like she had just ran a mile in record time. "What. Is happening. To me."_

" _Your guess is as good as mine." Bucky let her hair fall to her shoulders and helped her up gently. "Please let me go get you something."_

 _She leaned against the wall, "Fine." She had finally given in after almost a week of Bucky pestering her about it. "Be quick, it's getting dark and HYDRA has been awfully quiet today, I'm worried something might be up." The 19 year old instructed._

 _Bucky put on a face, the mask he used to conceal any hurt, discomfort, pain, or fear he was feeling. His ice cold eyes met her soft, warm ones. "I will. Just promise me you'll eat something and be in bed before I get back"_

" _K." She agreed softly and looked at the ground. That was code for 'I'll do it but I don't want to.' Bucky had learned. He nodded, not wanting to start an argument by reiterating the importance of eating._

 _He slipped out into the cool evening air, hood up, hair pulled back. Bucky didn't understand why she didn't just eat to regain her strength. He recalled a time where he had gotten ill during a mission, HYDRA always assigned men to him to cover his tracks, supply him with weapons and food when he needed it, and most importantly, finish something if he could not. That day, he was miserable. He had been sick for weeks. The scientists were worried that the serum had caused a possible cancer in his bloodstream, or if his immune system had been compromised because he had been out of cryo for too long. During cryostasis, they would pump him with antioxidants and various fluids, some no short of vaccines on steroids. He had been sent to Holland to kill a reporter that was getting a little too close to HYDRA. Bucky remembered throwing up the whole way over there, much to his associates' disgust. He couldn't even keep down water. As he was prepping to snipe the overly inquisitive reporter, he felt his stomach flip and he missed his shot and instead hit a little girl. The crowd scattered except for the mother who was cradling her dead daughter in her arms, wailing. He felt nothing. Instead, he spewed vomit on the ground next to him, as he heard HYDRA cussing him out in his ear. The reporter had gotten away. Mission failed; his first one ever. He didn't even remember the punishment that ensued when he got back, he had actually blacked out due to the pain._

 _Bucky was abruptly ripped away from his thought as a pair of strong arms grabbed him and flung him across the street. The pavement cracked beneath his arm as he made impact. "Didn't think that we'd find you?"_

 _It was one of the other super soldiers…and he had his equally strong, super soldier friend with him. Bucky fought back best he could, but he was overpowered by their combined strength, he yelled out as something stung his neck, and then it was dark._

He'd never forgive himself. He'd left a sick, 19-year-old girl who went rogue on her own special ops mission, to fend for herself, in an unfamiliar country, thousands of miles away from home. Bucky knew she was more than capable of handling herself and obviously she did, but somehow during that time he felt solely responsible for her safety and well-being. That feeling had actually never left.

"Buck." It was Steve on the other side of the door. "It's almost 3 pm you can't just stay in there all day."

"Watch me." He replied irritably. Why couldn't Steve just leave him alone? That was probably the fifteenth time he'd been by. He sat up, wincing slightly as his bruised side pained him. Tony had gotten him good, probably even cracked a rib. Steve had begged him earlier that day to go to the on base hospital, but Bucky didn't want anyone seeing or touching him.

"Can I come in?" Bucky could hear Steve thump his head against the door in obvious frustration.

"Fine." Bucky conceded. He stretched his back muscles and took a bite out of a rice cake that was on his night table. Cheddar rice cakes is what Cypra would ask for every morning when she was sick. Their safe house was stocked full of them by the end of the week she started feeling ill. "FRIDAY let him in."

"Yes Mr. Barnes." The door slid open and a beat up, and slightly bloody, Steve Rogers stood before him. "What the hell happened to you." Bucky almost choked on his food.

"Stark and I got into a bit of an," Steve paused, "argument." He said slowly.

"Over me?" Bucky furrowed his eyebrows. "Steve."

"It was over a few different things." He sat on the bed beside Bucky. "I didn't like the way he handled last night…and Cypra," Bucky felt weird hearing her name come out of his friend's mouth. "Well, she's pretty angry at both of you."

Bucky's heart sank. He was already going to have to explain himself to her for Berlin, and now this. He wondered if he could even hold a conversation with her for five minutes without breaking down like a child. He wanted to hear her again, and feel her warmth. In that moment, last night, it was like she was the only one who existed. His universe came crashing down on him and he happily abandoned it for her presence. That was his _first_ mistake.

"Are we kicked off the base?" Bucky asked coldly.

"No," Steve sort of chuckled. "Cypra bawled him out, for lack of a better phrase, into letting us stay, thank goodness; our team needs work."

"I'm sorry Steve, I didn't mean to cause an issue." _'Not even 48 whole hours after you guys arrived, dumbass.'_ Bucky looked at his hands as he thought.

"You didn't. He was provoking you, probably upset that his one and only child knew someone he wasn't fond of."

Bucky looked up at his friend's sincere, but broken, eyes. Bucky knew something involving Stark happened even before they went to Wakanda, during the midnight hours as they grabbed their essentials. He didn't ask, he didn't want to pry.

"I on the other hand, am really confused about your reaction to seeing her." Steve began, raising an eyebrow slightly. "How come I've never heard about her, Buck?" He sounded the slightest bit hurt to Bucky, which made him shift uncomfortably. He bit the inside of his cheek trying to figure out how he was going to explain it.

The memories rushed forward again.

" _Stop it." Cypra whined and pushed him away. She was playing a game on something she said was 'an oldie but a goodie' a Nintendo 64. Bucky had never heard of it before, but he did enjoy pressing buttons at random while she played, messing up her progress. He would eventually stop when she either started yelling at him, or threw it at his face, which he always caught before it actually hit him. That just seemed to infuriate her more._

 _Then there were the nights, full of screaming and thrashing as the nightmares grew more and more intense. Cypra had a spray bottle of ice water handy beside her bed to wake him up. He often left bruises on her body as she stubbornly attempted to wrestle him out of the terror. He always felt awful the next morning when he saw them, yet she was always so chipper, full of life. She would hand him breakfast and coffee with a smile even if she hadn't got any sleep the night before._

A smile tugged at his lips as the memory flashed, but it disappeared as quickly as it had come. "She's…" He stopped. "It's complicated Steve, it really is." Bucky was not at all ready to talk about it.

Steve looked disappointed, but understanding. "Ok, you can talk about it when you're ready."

Then Bucky felt guilty, Steve was always opening up about things but here Bucky sat, with his huge vibranium walls up, fully armed and ready to attack anyone or anything that posed a threat to him or his feelings. He sighed, finally giving in. "I was her assignment. She was briefly recruited to S.H.I.E.L.D through the United States Air Force. That's how we met." That's all he gave his friend.

Steve looked satisfied for the moment and nodded. "How did you get so close?"

"We're not close." Bucky lied, "Weren't close." He corrected.

"You really expect me to believe that Buck?" The soldier slightly tipped his head one direction. Steve sighed when he was met with silence, "Alright, I'll stop asking. Please come to dinner."

"No."

"I'll bring my shield _and_ a gun this time." He coaxed.

"Fine."

* * *

 **Earlier that morning**

Steve woke up feeling ridiculously stiff. It was 6 am, time to get the team up for training. They had a long day ahead of them.

Everyone was up at the first knock except for Bucky, Steve knew he was going to have to fight to get him out of that room and he was starting to wonder if that was going to be a waste of time. Bucky was unbelievably stubborn when it came to forcing him to see someone he didn't like, and he knew that person was Tony.

After the third knock, he let it be. They gathered in the kitchen to eat breakfast.

"Barns isn't coming?" A familiar voice asked.

"Clint, when did you get here?" Steve inquired, half in confusion, and half in disbelief as he didn't remember seeing the archer at all prior to that moment.

"Last night," He replied. "Everyone was fighting in the hallway so I just asked FRIDAY what room I'd been assigned and she told me."

Steve felt incredibly guilty for some reason. He shook his head slightly and sighed. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that."

"Haven't seen Cypra since she was 11." Clint chuckled. "She was one of my students when I taught archery. She made it to nationals and won and after that I took her and a few others to France to defend our title." He laughed a little, "That was a disaster. Never EVER take a group of preteen girls to France."

"Oh don't pretend like you didn't have fun." A voice from the cabinet area emerged. Cypra poured coffee into a thermos. Her hair had been straightened and fell down her shoulders and she wore an MIT hoodie, most likely Tony's as it looked a little big on her.

Clint half laughed. "I'd have fun now that you're drinking age."

She laughed and sipped her coffee. " _That_ would be a disaster, Clint."

"I know." He confessed.

Steve couldn't tell if Natasha was annoyed or amused as she smacked him on the arm. "How come you didn't tell me about her?"

"It was a matter of her safety." He stated. "And plus, once I made the connection, Tony gave me 3 million to shut the hell up about it. I wouldn't have even guessed they were related until Cypra said something only a CEO or owner would know about Stark Industry stocks."

"Yeah, I was a blabbermouth." Cypra agreed. "But Tony and I aren't blood-related and we don't even really look alike so it was easy to hide. I mean I'm slightly tanner than him."

"Not blood relatives?" Thor lifted his head from his head from whatever he was reading.

She put her thermos down. "Yeah, Tony should have explained this to you guys a long time ago."

"Explained what?" Tony stepped in the room, rubbing his bruised jawline. He wore a long sleeve shirt which Steve thought was strange. Tony hated long sleeves, even in the winter.

"Why we're not blood relatives." She seethed to him.

"You're blood to me, I've always said that."

"I know, dad." Her voice softened. "You guys remember your good pal Nick Fury?"

Disgruntled 'Mhms' and "yeahs." Erupted from the room.

"I remember reading about him." Peter said, not taking his eyes off of his phone.

"Well, I'm actually his biological niece. His sister was my mom." Cypra expressed. Everyone turned to look at her, shock, across most of their faces. She looked down at the counter. "She was killed in '95 when whoever found out she was Nick's sister tried to use her to get to him. I was just a baby, not even a month old."

Silence.

She chuckled bitterly. "I guess that's what happens when you run an intelligence agency. I don't think I'll ever forgive him for that. I'm glad he's dead."

Steve wondered if she really knew.

"Anyways, Tony was 25, he was alone, and actually, his parents were friends with my mom from all the way back in the..." She turned to Tony seeking information.

"60's." He filled in. "But I never knew Nick."

"Nick obviously couldn't take care of me, and when Tony heard I was going to be thrown into foster care he jumped at the opportunity to become my legal guardian." The young woman continued.

"It was total spur of the moment." Tony whipped around to face the team after pouring himself some coffee.

"What?" Cypra turned to him. "You said you gave it a lot of thought."

"No, I just told you that so you wouldn't think I was a rash decision maker." He confessed.

"I _already_ think that." She told him in a slightly irritated tone.

Steve sat down, his legs were suddenly tired. "Tony, how come you've never told us about all this?" He noticed his voice was edging on hurt.

"To keep her safe." He explained. "Think about what would've happened if whoever killed her mother found out she had a daughter. That person, or anyone else who hated Nick Fury, could've killed her too to get to him."

It made sense, it really did.

"What about your biological father?" Natasha crossed her arms uncomfortably as she bravely asked such a question.

"I never knew him," Cypra shrugged. "And apparently neither did my mother."

"We never saw her with anyone." Tony gently stroked her arm once. "Your mother was very reclusive."

"Can't say I blame her." Cypra took another drink of her coffee. "Oh and you're in deep shit by the way for last night."

Tony heaved a dreading sigh. "I know."

"How's James?" Cypra put her thermos down and turned to Steve.

It was a few seconds before it registered that he had been asked something. "Well, he's not coming out of his room so I'm going to take a wild guess and say angry."

"Well that makes two of us then." She smiled, fire in her irises.

"Three." Steve corrected, eyeing Tony.

"Four." Tony shot back.

"Five." Peter shoved eggs in his mouth.

"Six." Clint stated.

"What? Why are _you_ angry?" Natasha turned to him.

"I'm not. We were all just saying numbers so I thought I'd add." He shrugged.

Steve was grateful for the comic relief.

"I can't believe I almost died." Peter expressed. "I mean; I've almost died a couple of times before but that happened faster than I could prepare for it."

"I know Peter, I'm so sorry." Cypra sympathized. "I was reading about you on my way up here. You're an impressive kid."

Peter looked up and beamed. "Really? Uh-I mean thanks, I feel kind of second-rate compared to these guys though."

"Second rate? Peter, I don't know anyone who has the 6th sense you do and can climb up a wall with their bare hands. Also, the molecular structure and intricate gene mutation causing the web discharge is just incredible." She told him. "You are not second rate. You just need practice."

Peter blushed a little at her words. Steve wondered if that was going to turn into Peter having interest in her. He hoped not, Bucky wouldn't respond very well to that.

That afternoon, during the lunch break outside next to the Quinjet hangar, Steve took the opportunity to apologize to Tony for their talk the previous night. He hoped it hadn't left him too upset. He quickly realized that it had… Tony hardly spoke to him except for a quiet, "It's all good, Rogers."

"Tony." Steve set his fork down trying to make eye contact. Tony wouldn't. "How can I make this right?"

"You can't." The genius informed. "Like you said, it happened. I'm over it, I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Steve huffed a quiet but defeated sigh, gave up on that conversation and switched to accountability mode. "Why'd you provoke him last night?"

"Barnes?" Tony turned to face him. "He was touching my daughter, what was I supposed to do? Let it slide?"

"You know your daughter is an adult." Steve countered.

"And your buddy is a serial killer."

"Not by his choice." Steve felt the anger rising. His long hair blew slightly in the wind. "How long are you going to keep blaming him for this?"

The wind ruffled Tony's hair also, "As long as it takes for me to forgive him."

"So never." Steve concluded.

"Maybe never, maybe someday." He took a sip of his 'water', which Steve knew was actually Everclear.

The soldier couldn't believe how nonchalant he was about this whole thing.

"Maybe Bucky will never forgive you for criminalizing him and tearing his arm off," Steve suggested. "But he probably will, you want to know why?" He had actually been trying all day to get Bucky out of his room, but each time Bucky would tell him to leave him alone, or not respond at all.

"Enlighten me."

"Because he's not an egotistical crybaby." Steve spat.

Tony clocked him in the face, which surprised Steve but angered him more. He stood up, grabbed Tony and threw him across the concrete.

"Hey!" Natasha yelled from the other table. The Avengers all stood, ready to break up whatever fight was about to happen.

Steve grabbed his shield, maybe Tony would understand if he beat it out of him.

Natasha stood in his way. "Steve, this is not the way to handle things." She was right, but he didn't care.

He shoved her out of the way to protect her and put his shield up as Tony shot a beam at him from the suit that had already assembled on him. "Alright Captain, I think you've gotten a little too comfortable." An electronic voice spoke as Ironman approached.

"Maybe." Steve got into fighting stance.

Steve flung his shield at Tony, knocking one of the boosters out of his boots, Tony went lopsided and collided into the wall behind them, temporarily grounded. "You're going to pay for that." The broken booster ejected and was replaced with a new one. Ironman flew at Steve and grabbed him, launching him into the grassy ditch at high speeds. Steve momentarily lost his wind, caught his breath and rolled over to grab his shield. No, Tony was the one who was going to pay. From there, Steve began landing blows to the suit, until Stark hit him square on the chest and knocked him back a few feet, Ironman then nailed him in the face a few times before Steve was able to get out of the way. Steve threw the billionaire off of him with his shield. Thunder rumbled above and clouds were suddenly forming in an otherwise clear fall day.

Steve was too distracted to notice Thor approaching, but by the time he did it, was too late. Thor pulled a massive bolt out of the sky and struck it into the ground between them with a loud _CRACK._ The shockwave sent the two Avengers flying backward, opposite of each other. Steve hit the ground with such force he momentarily blacked out. He came to, ears ringing, and sat up slowly. He couldn't hear Thor that well but he could read his lips. "Enough."

Steve saw Cypra say something to Thor and storm over to Tony. Before he knew it, he felt an arm scoop under his to help him up. The ringing finally subsided and he noticed it was Sam. "Thanks." Steve dusted himself off. That bolt had knocked the fight right out of him. He had almost forgotten how powerful Thor really was.

"We done?" Cypra threw her arms up in frustration.

The look on Steve's face must have said it all.

"Good." She dragged Tony who deactivated the suit inside the hangar. Steve couldn't hear what she was saying but the way she stood before him arms crossed and the way Tony's back was against the wall, head slightly lowered, it didn't look good. At one point she even punched him in the chest and got in his face. Steve turned to Thor whose expression was equally as surprised. Thor even looked a little impressed.

"Captain." Cypra spoke with such authority he almost said 'yes ma'am.' He didn't want to get hit in the chest again. "I just saved yours and Barnes' ass from being kicked off of base." She approached them until they met eyes.

Steve didn't know whether to say thank you or ask her why, but it didn't matter because he didn't have time to speak.

"So I would think very closely about your behavior from here on out. You're supposed to be the mature one." The wind blew her hair up from beneath. Steve felt a chill somewhere in his back, her eyes were a warm brown with green and flecks of gold surrounding her pupil. Her eyelashes were long and dark further bringing out the green, a few small freckles sprinkled her face. She was short, probably about 5'4 but she had a fierceness to her, result of being in the military. Steve noticed she was actually quite beautiful, and the world slowed a little as he thought about the relationship between her and Bucky. He blinked out of it, hoping she didn't notice him staring.

"You're right." Steve stood a little taller trying to come off a little more in charge. "I was reckless."

"Well he started it." Sam argued.

"And did you not just see me rip him a new one for that?" Cypra shot him an irritated look. "He won't do it again." She assured. "I need to talk to Barnes."

"You can try." Steve scratched his head and looked at the ground briefly. "He won't come out."

"I'll just wait till dinner then." She shrugged, "He's got to eat at some point."

That was true. Steve wondered if his friend had eaten anything at all today.

The first lieutenant pivoted and headed back for the table, mentioning something Steve couldn't hear to Thor who erupted into laughter. Those two seemed to get along great already. He remembered it being a while before Thor warmed up to him.

Steve cut the training for the rest of the day, he was in no mood to teach after having the shit knocked out of him like that. He spent the rest of the day setting up the next day's training. Cypra's eyes and voice kept flashing back to him, he was slightly restless about her for some reason. He needed to find the backstory without stepping on anyone's toes. He was going to have to force it out of Bucky and _that_ would not be an easy task.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry this took so long, I've had a crazy week and my boyfriend is in the Army he's been gone all weekend. Also, my son is being an attention seeking insomniac demon. He won't sleep through the night now that dad is gone *** **insert eyeroll * this chapter has rated T content in it.**

 **Iconic Vine of the day: "Hurricane Katrina? More like Hurricane Tortilla!"**

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Dinner conversation silenced as Bucky entered the room, he could hear Cypra take a deep breath in a clear attempt to clear the air. He felt like everyone was simultaneously trying to stare into his soul. He had gone from perfectly happy and warm in Wakanda, to apprehensive and cold when he arrived, and then into this dreamlike feeling and awful heat early in the morning. He was so hot and uncomfortable all day, he even turned the air all the way down to 60 degrees in his room and he was still sweating.

"Your side." The young woman chirped.

"What?" Bucky hadn't even heard her. He didn't even recognize the sound of his own voice as it escaped from his lips. She approached him gracefully, hardly making a sound on the marble ground. He felt lightheaded, and shaky. He wondered if this was all a hallucination or his eyes were playing tricks on him. They often did that while under HYDRA's control, it was the drugs they gave him to keep him calm. Cypra seemed to glide, not really walk. ' _Something must be wrong with me.'_ He thought to himself.

"Let me see your side." It wasn't a question and before Bucky could protest she had lifted the left side of his white shirt up to reveal a black and blue rib cage. His abdomen tightened as her cool fingers brushed up against his body ever so slightly. He felt an unfamiliar warmth between his legs and cussed himself out internally, he retreated to the depths of his self-control; his very being, to keep an erection from emerging. Why would his body have such a strong reaction to that? Great. He knew now that she couldn't hardly touch him or he'd unravel like a tightly woven ball of string.

She hissed slightly at the sight. "You might have cracked one of his ribs, dad." She sent an icy glare over to Tony who was sitting at the end of the table looking expressionless. She dropped his shirt.

"Good." Tony half snorted. It took everything in Bucky's power to stay perfectly still.

"You better cut that crap." She sliced the air with her words. "I swear to God, Tony." The fury seemed to seep out of her slowly, like lava flowing down a volcano.

The billionaire sat up a little straighter. "You know; I don't remember raising you to be so demanding. I thought I was _your_ parent, not the other way around _missy_." Missy… Tony was challenging her, and Bucky knew from first-hand experience what happened when you challenged Cypra Alise.

 _It was unbelievable how quick she was. Bucky couldn't shake her, not even for a moment. He thought about using his sheer strength against her, but there was no way he would get a moment to execute that kind of force without getting slashed open first. Her focus seemed to dance from his eyes to his hands as she parried and stepped towards him almost nailing him in the carotid, He had to either get out of there or get that knife out of her hand, neither of which was going to be easy. Her eyes seemed to glow as a whirlwind of sharp kitchen objects came flying at him from all directions, he managed to dodge them or block them with his arm. What seemed like hours later, he finally got an opportunity to grab her arm and when he did, he unintentionally broke it. Bucky then threw her to the ground and used his weight to keep her there until the objects all clattered to the ground. This was the second fight they'd had in two days. She didn't trust him, if he made a suspicious move; she was there, ready to fight him off._

" _I was getting the bread off the fridge." He ensured. Her eyes welled with tears and Bucky sighed, helping her sit up. "Cypra…can I call you that? Or do you prefer First Lieutenant." Bucky really didn't care, but he was afraid he'd loose his asset. She was his only way out._

 _She appeared too angry to reply._

" _I think I might have broken your arm. I'm sorry. I'll make you a sling." Bucky sounded so foreign to himself actually apologizing to someone._

" _I think I stabbed you." Cypra looked at his stomach area, and sure enough, she had gashed him. He didn't even know when that had happened, but he was bleeding, suddenly the dull stinging amplified and he grabbed a washcloth off of the counter and began applying pressure. "And I'll stitch it up." She affirmed blankly, and stood to grab her medical bag in the other room._

He still had that scar.

"Really? You sure act like a child for a so called parent." She snapped, "In fact I remember a time when I had to regularly hide your prescription pain killers from you because you kept over taking them."

Tony was quiet. Sober faces flooded the table.

"I had to sleep with you every night to make sure you didn't overdose." Cypra was close to tears. "Because if your heart just stopped beating and you died," She stopped herself for a moment to regain her composure. "you were the only one I had."

Bucky could feel the anger rising in Cypra, after she reached a certain level, he knew there was no return. Then he saw it; the dinner plates, the utensils, the glasses, even the napkins slowly rising off of the table unbeknownst to her. The rest of the Avengers sit some with confused and some with startled faces.

"What was I going to do without you, dad?" The tears had finally fallen. "Seriously, and now 13 years later you want to scold me, for what? You don't like that I know James on a personal level? Classified. You don't like that I've been gone for so long? That's tough. I am a big girl now; I grew up a long time ago thanks to you!" She was yelling at that point.

"Cy." Bucky grabbed her wrist, a move so bold he was almost expecting Tony to jump up and charge at him. "Please don't." He had only seen her completely lose it once, 20 people had died almost instantaneously.

She turned her head around like she was going say something to him when she noticed the dinnerware. She gasped slightly and they all came crashing back down on the table.

"What _was_ that?" Peter examined his plate and the looked up. "How'd you do that?"

The First Lieutenant ignored him. "I'm going to bed. Fuck you." She turned to Tony when she swore. She gently pulled her wrist from Bucky's grasp and gently brushed past him as she left the room.

When she was gone, Bucky looked up at Tony. "She could've killed every single one of us just now."

"You don't think I know that about my own daughter?" Tony seethed. "It came out when she was 10. She never learned how to control it."

"Tell me about it." Bucky lifted up another part of his shirt to show a nasty scar trailing from his abdomen down to where his pants met his hips. Bucky noticed that Steve's face washed over with concern. "43 stitches."

Tony's eyes darted from the scar to his plate. "Treat her like you would Banner." He announced out loud. "She's not as sensitive, but…" He trailed off. "The extent of the damage she can do is…"

"Exponential." Vision finished. "We are unsure what she's capable of. Wanda is the best candidate to relate to her, however." Thor shifted uncomfortably, he looked almost guilty. Bucky wondered why the God of Thunder suddenly lost his sense of contentment.

"I'll try to talk to her." The Sokovian quietly stood up and left the room after the other woman.

Steve crossed his arms. "Tony, you've got to watch what you say. I've been telling you that for years. If you knew what she was capable of, why did you provoke her?"

"How did I provoke her?"

"You called her 'missy." Bucky answered a little irritated at the stupidity of the question. "She's not 5."

"You watch your tone with me, Barnes. I know her better than you ever will." Tony crowed.

Bucky let a smirk creep to his lips, he loved watching the billionaire rage. "You sure?"

Tony shot up just to be slammed back down to his seat by Steve, who held him there. "Really Buck? Do you need the lecture too?"

"I'm sorry, I just like to watch him get his panties in a bunch." Bucky half laughed. "It's actually kind of entertaining." Tony struggled against Steve's strength in an attempt to get up. Steve shot Bucky a partly angry, partly disapproving look.

"Alright, Alright. I'll eat in my room." He picked up his plate and left the kitchen, glad to be out of the awkward environment.

He ended up eating, showering, and then laying down. TV blaring in the background. He didn't know what could've possibly caused him to get so tired, he'd been in the room all day. Yet he was exhausted. It had to have been lingering jet lag.

 _Her hair ticked his midsection as she lay next to him, head resting on his chest, metal arm across her comfortably. He listening as her steady breathing lulled him into relaxing further and further. HYDRA often sent random women in to pleasure him, they were trying to get him to release his urges then to keep him focused in the field. He always pushed them away and told them no. He hated people touching him, and he didn't know why HYDRA thought he made prostitutes an exception. With Cypra however, he seemed to melt at her touch, or at least it felt like it. He actually craved it, and he learned pretty quickly that if he touched her first she would touch him back. He soon found himself at various parts of the day gently rubbing her back or entangling her hair between his fingers, anything to cause affection from her. He felt bad manipulating her like that, but then again…_

Bucky awoke, "FRIDAY, time." He sat up slowly.

"It is 2:19 am Mr. Barnes."

"Shit." He had meant to talk to Steve little before bed, oh well.

Something compelled him to check out the rest of the facility. There were 3 floors and Bucky had only seen one. He decided he was going to take a little self-guided tour while nobody was around to bother him. He found the elevator and pushed the up arrow, it slid open quietly and he stepped in, it smelled strange, like a new car.

The second floor consisted of 3 conference rooms, A, B, and C and 2 fitness centers filled with high tech training equipment Bucky had never even seen before. HYDRA always had him training, sometimes up to 10 hours a day, they often used outdated Soviet equipment that would occasionally either fall apart and hurt someone, or stop working all together. All in all, the equipment here wasn't as advanced as Wakanda's training rooms, but it was a close second.

The third floor was obviously a leisure level. There was a small library, a computer room, a lab, but what caught Bucky's eye the most was the massive Olympic size swimming pool to the right. He approached it, taking in the view of the water. Suddenly, something caught his peripheral vision. He looked to the left and saw tiny splashes erupt from the water. Someone was swimming laps. He entered the swimming center; chlorine instantly filled his nostrils. As he approached, the figure stopped to take a break at the end of the pool closest to him. He immediately recognized her. She turned around as if she knew someone was coming and slightly jumped at the sight of him.

"James." Cypra put a hand on her chest for a brief moment. "You scared the shit out of me. What the hell are you doing up here? Do you know what time it is?"

"I could ask you the same question." He countered. "And yes, its two thirty in the morning."

She acknowledged him with a tilt of her head and pulled herself out of the pool. She had a bright red bikini on. Bucky took in her half nakedness feverishly but respectfully. Cypra sighed, she must have felt him looking, she wrung out her hair as she said, "I couldn't find a wetsuit so I resorted to this thing. Can't believe it still fits, last time I wore it was my freshman year of college, which was simultaneously my junior year of high school." She chuckled quietly. "Good times." She switched gears. "I'm still pissed at you."

"I know." He sat down next to her after tossing her a towel. "I would be too."

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Bucky didn't know what to say. He could apologize, but he wasn't really sorry for anything. Stark got what he deserved. It took him almost another thirty seconds to realize she was crying.

"Cypra." Bucky then materialized in his mind what he _actually_ needed to apologize for. "I'm sorry about Berlin."

She shook her head quickly. "It had to have been HYDRA."

"It was," He reassured her. "They sent 2 chemically enhanced soldiers after me."

She covered her face with one of her hands wiping the sudden tears away. "I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you." She spoke with a steady voice.

"Protect me?" The Winter Soldier was dumbfounded. "Cypra, you protected me for 8 months, I'm the one who couldn't protect _you._ You even warned me before I left that they had been quiet; you couldn't have known. _We_ couldn't have known." He was quiet for a few seconds trying to fight back his own tears. "I thought they killed you. They told me they had."

Cypra laughed bitterly, "Yeah James, they would've had to catch me first."

Bucky let a smile crawl to his lips. "I know, it's just, you were so sick."

She turned her whole body to face him. "I wasn't sick." Bucky was taken aback by that statement. He looked her blankly.

"I managed to catch up with a friend who was in the same area at that time, her name was Jane." The young woman began. "I made her swear to keep me off of the radar but she insisted that I go to the hospital; obviously I told her no way. We were fighting about it for days and then…" She glanced upwards at Bucky. "I met her boyfriend, Thor."

The pieces were suddenly coming together. The way he had walked her away from the fight, the look on his face at dinner. "So you've known him for a while then?"

She nodded slightly. "He said that they had advanced medical equipment on Asgard, and he could take me there to get checked out. Nobody had to know." She continued. "I was out of options; I hadn't eaten anything in almost three days." Bucky felt a pang of guilt hit his stomach. Tears fell from her eyes again; she didn't wipe them this time. "Their doctor ran some tests and found that I wasn't actually sick at all." She met his eyes with such intensity that it made him blink. "I was actually 8 weeks pregnant."

The world stopped spinning. Bucky was so caught off guard he had to put a hand down to support himself sitting up. All of a sudden he felt like he had jumped off of a cliff. The adrenaline was racing through his veins. _The feeling of her hair against his neck, her lips, her fingers racing against his skin._ A child? How could he have been so reckless? It must have been a minute before he came to. Cypra had her head in her knees, trying to stifle her cries. "And then not even 3 weeks later," She couldn't finish. "The blood." She choked out.

Bucky was unsure what she meant at first, but as his mind raced, it came to him that she had miscarried. This time his world came crashing down on his head to the point a headache ensued. A child? _His_ child, miscarried? He instinctively grabbed her and pulled her into his chest. He didn't care if he could get in trouble, he didn't care about Stark, and he didn't care about the cameras, or who, if anyone, was listening. He just wanted to hold her there forever, and he told himself he would stay as long as she wanted to stay. Bucky was shaking, he was sure Cypra noticed but he could care less. The memories and images of her all flashed behind his eyes so fast, he feared for a moment he would lose consciousness. That's when he realized he hadn't been breathing. He took a deep breath trying to calm himself, but in all seriousness, he was panicking.

"I'm so so sorry," He whispered to her, rocking her back and forth, his voice broke "Cy, I had no idea."

Her sobs continued into his chest and echoed slightly in the large room. He had broken this poor girl, and he would never forgive himself. He was a monster, he killed people and ruined lives, that was his specialty. _This_ was his specialty.

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Cypra lifted her head from his embrace. It was 3 years in the past, why was she still crying about it? She had cried for months after the miscarriage, she couldn't even help Jane through her breakup with Thor she was so destroyed by it. Wiping her eyes she half smiled. "I can't believe you escaped."

"I can't believe you're alive. I thought for sure that they had killed you." James shook his head bitterly. "It was all another one of their ploys to control me."

"You had a bad in there, I know. I'm Sorry." She touched his collar bone gently. "I didn't know what I was thinking trying to keep you away from them, I should've known better. I never intended for you to get recaptured. But HYDRA, they're always one step ahead of you it doesn't matter what you do. And then when the Bifrost broke," Bucky's slightly confused expression compelled a further explanation. "It's their way of traveling, it broke and I was stuck on Asgard, with Thor for a while. Even after they fixed it I wasn't ready to come home and face it." She wiped away more tears. "Face you."

"Please stop blaming yourself." His usually cold green-blue eyes were now tender. He grabbed her hand and held it in his for a moment, it was then that reality hit. "Your dad's going to kill me."

"He already tried and didn't succeed so I wouldn't be so worried about it. Plus, he doesn't have to know." She shifted slightly, and touched his metal arm, gently running her fingers down the ridges. Whoever designed the new one did a really good job. "My dad is full of hot air, but there's a limit to what he can do."

"I think I'm starting to see that." James stated irritably. "Doesn't make it any less annoying."

Cypra sat quietly, enjoying the heat radiating off the man's body. "What happened in Berlin?" She looked up at him. "I feel like I can't remember that part of my life." _'I can only remember how I felt.'_

Bucky smiled slightly, "I feel like that's the _only_ part I remember; _want_ to remember anyhow."

Cypra could feel it in her chest; the suffocating tightness that usually preceded a rapid heartbeat and semi flushed face. She felt his real hand slide up her leg slightly, the sudden warmth on her cool skin made her breakout in goosebumps. The young woman closed her eyes momentarily. ' _Don't do it.'_ She begged him in her thoughts. ' _Because once you start, I can't stop.'_ She scolded herself, why, why wasn't she in bed like everyone else? Why did she have to have these feelings towards him? He killed her grandparents for Christ's sake and he could've killed her father. Shit, he had almost killed _her_ at one point. Cypra always had a bad pick with guys but this; this was something else entirely.

"Are you cold?" He asked.

She stood up suddenly, "Yeah, I should probably get to bed. Goodnight." She had to get out of there. She turned towards the door, but a metal arm grabbed hers.

"Oh no. You're not just going to tell me about how we lost a child and then shut me out." Bucky angrily pulled her back towards him to face him. His eyes had a waterline in them. "You're not going to do that to me."

She scoffed and gave him a look of absurdity, "Look James we can't just-" and with a rather rough yank of her long brown hair his tongue was suddenly in her mouth, her body against his and she could feel his blooming hardness against her. Cypra's body threw her into fight or flight mode, but she knew it was already too late. The second he had seen her walk into the facility it was too late. This needed to happen or it was going to be a never ending battle from then on out between them.

She allowed their tongues and lips to dance a little while longer before pulling herself away. "There are fucking cameras in here, moron." She chided.

"Well let's hope they aren't recording anything."

"James, I really got to shower." She pleaded, "The chlorine is going to dry out my skin."

He seemed to get the message. "Alright." He made eye contact with her briefly. "It's going to take me some time to…"

"Adjust?" She finished.

"Yeah, that."

"It's just that if my dad knew about-"

"I know; I'm not trying to get in between that." He looked towards the door hesitantly. I'm under strict instructions not to cause issues. I already screwed up once."

"Who gave you those, Rogers?" She smirked. That man was such a goodie two shoe, but it made sense. He was _unbelievably_ polite.

Bucky shook his head slightly. "Cypra, I can't just pretend nothing happened."

Cypra traced his jawline with her finger gently feeling the stubbly hair brush past her, "I'm not asking you to. Do you remember, when we staked out that library?" A memory jumped forth.

"Hide in plain sight." He resolved. Bucky looked up at her with worry across his face. "I don't know how long I can do that."

"Just try." She told him softly. "I'll work something out."

The truth was, she didn't want to cut ties with James. She still wanted him, three years and one miscarriage later. He still occupied her thoughts, her dreams, and even influenced her actions at times. Not a day went by where she didn't see his eyes when she closed hers, or hear his laughter in her head. For years he had been tearing her apart and rebuilding her, day by day, moment by moment, and she credited him with who she had become. Seeing him here had thrust her into many unanticipated emotions, she quite frankly didn't know how to cope with them. She defaulted to soldier, carrying herself like she had it under control. ' _The enemy can read your emotions.'_ She flashed back to basic training. Cypra left the room quickly.

The Air Force had taught her well.

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 **Buckle up people, shit's about to get real. If you have any questions or concerns about anything ever please please PM me. I promise I won't hunt you down and kill you :P Also if you don't want to review this story you can shoot me a PM and let me know how things are settling with you. :) Stay tuned, I've already started the next chapter.**


	6. Chapter 6

**HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Here's something scary for you guys: THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M**

 **This chapter also takes place a few weeks after the last one** **. Please read the** _ **whole**_ **thing or you're going to be lost when I post the next one! I've never written an explicit scene before, and it's not like super smutty either, it keeps its maturity (Because, well, the act is a mature thing lol) so just let me know how I did.**

 **Iconic vine of the day: WelL, WhEn LiFe GiVeS yOu LeMoNs **** **Thomas the tank engine theme intensifies** ******

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"Cy," Peter called, laughing, "You've got to see this."

Cypra strode into the dining area coffee in her hand, glasses on, trying not to spill on her white tank top. She had her hair up in a bun a few locks of hair hanging from her head. Her black dragon tattoo was slightly exposed, crawling up her chest onto her right shoulder. Peter had a picture of a defaced 'don't text and drive' PSA but a giant moth was in the car, and the car had crashed into a stop sign. The photo showed the moth with a phone in hand, and the phone had a picture of… a lamp? 'AT&T reminds you to stay safe while driving' The text below the picture informed. Cypra busted out laughing. These moth memes had gone so far as to take over PSA about driving safely. The two had really gotten to know each other in the last couple of weeks, Peter, though incredibly intelligent, lightened the mood whenever things between her dad and Bucky got heated. She learned that she could grab the teen's attention for a few minutes and either laugh, or learn something new about computer engineering.

She shook her head in disappointment after she had calmed down. "That's too much." She sat down next to the teenager as he scrolled through Reddit. She sipped her coffee, occasionally laughing as he tapped on various moth related memes.

Bucky sat next to her, peering past her to see what was so funny on Peter's phone. Cypra let down her hair shaking it out and turning towards him, she smirked at the look of irritation on his face. "James," She gently brushed up against him, "It's just an internet meme. It's like a joke."

The Winter Soldier spread cream cheese on his toasted bagel which Cypra promptly took a bite out of and handed back to him. She grinned with mouth full of food. In Berlin, she was always eating his food, in fact, whenever they were out to dinner on a rare occasion, she would make sure he ordered something different than her just so she could try it. Bucky smiled, expression moving from discontent, to light humor and familiarity.

"I still can't get over how you call him James." Natasha sat down across from them, plate filled with various fruits and grains. "Or is that classified information also?" She smirked.

Cypra swallowed her food and scoffed, "No. That I _can_ tell you." The room seemed to quiet, just like it did every time Cypra was about to reveal a small, seemingly insignificant part of their past. "I was always on a first name basis with him." She revealed. "I always called him James no matter how mad he got at me. For me, it was to separate him in my mind from being 'The Winter Soldier, the assassin' or "Sergeant Barnes, from the 107th' or 'Bucky, Steve's friend.' In a sense, I wanted to make him my own." She confessed. "I wanted to make him significant to me in a way that he wasn't with anyone else. He was my operation, he was _mine_."

Bucky nodded his head slightly and smiled a little, like he was hearing that for the first time. Maybe he really was. Cypra could've sworn she had told him that before. "Yeah I think after the second or third week of being called James, I just gave up. She's stubborn as all hell about some shit."

"Yes she is." Tony piped in.

"I tried to make her a grilled cheese sandwich once and she wouldn't eat it because it wasn't white bread and American cheese." Bucky took a bite out of his bagel.

"Yep and she won't watch TV without the captions on." Tony continued.

"Or sleep without a really heavy winter blanket, even in the summer." Bucky added.

Tony actually laughed at that one, he then groaned. "If I see coffee grounds in my disposal one more time-"

"-I'll clean it." Wanda offered from the couch.

"Hey, I sleep with the heavy blanket because it's a sensory issue, it also helps with anxiety. Didn't I tell you that I'm on the spectrum?" Cypra nudged Bucky playfully, squinting her eyes at him to see if he really didn't remember her telling him that.

"The spectrum?" Natasha asked.

"Autism." Cypra answered.

"You're autistic?" Peter peeled his eyes off of his phone to look at the woman. "I would've never guessed."

"That's because I'm very high functioning." She told the teen. "My issues are mostly, as I said earlier, sensory, which only happens at night; and anxiety driven obsessive-compulsive disorder."

"She's also very intelligent. More than she lets on." Tony complimented. "She helped me design the earliest of my suits."

Thor made brief eye contact with Cypra, his look seemed to say _'That explains a lot'_ he went back to reading 'Of War and Peace' promptly as not to draw attention to himself.

"Her attention to detail is also pretty amazing." Bucky added. "She learned how to take apart all my weapons and put them back together in a matter of hours."

Cypra could sense a competition beginning to ensue; who knew the most about her?

Peter phone buzzed, he read it, frowning slightly. "Hey Cy," Peter put his phone in his pocket, "Can I talk to you outside for a moment."

This probably wasn't good. "Sure," she scanned his face for an explanation, but he just stood up and left the room. Cypra stood up, raised an eyebrow to Natasha and briefly put her hand on Bucky's head before heading after him. The air conditioner hit her on the way out as she entered the hallway. "You ok?"

"No," Peter pouted, swaying his body in frustration. "This is a weird question," he began, "and you don't have to say yes, but, you're young enough; people wouldn't question anything…"

Cypra furrowed her eyebrows in concern, where could he possibly be going with this?

"Would you be my homecoming date this year? It's next Saturday. We'd just go as friends of course."

Cypra was taken aback at first, but then realized his phone buzzing must have been his date canceling. She immediately felt horrible for him. Tony had sent her to a private school in Texas growing up, they didn't have any fun events except for graduation at the end of the year. A few seconds had passed before she realized she hadn't even answered. "Uh, yes Peter! Of course, I would love to go it's just that," She felt kind of embarrassed. "Tony sent me to a private school and we didn't do any of that so I don't know how any of it works."

Peter perked up, "Oh don't worry about any of that." The teen was beaming. "All you have to do is wear a dress, I'll take care of everything else."

A dress? Cypra's heart skipped a beat, she hadn't worn a dress in years. She swallowed nervously, "What color does it have to be?"

"Any color you want." He smiled, it seemed like his world was finally falling into place. Cypra knew he had been acing his training and his calculus class at school. Now he had a date to homecoming. So, a black dress it was.

Cypra wrapped the teen into a hug. She was partially excited, no boy had ever asked her to a dance before, it took being out of school for five years for it to happen. "Thank you for being the first guy to ever ask me to a dance." She let him go.

"Thanks for being the first girl to ever go with me." Peter was blushing a little. She ruffled his hair as a reminder that she was much older than him and that there would be no romantic anything taking place between them ever. "I know you're way older than me, but girls my age are so…" He was searching for a word.

"Petty?" He nodded. She put a hand on his shoulder and nodded with him. "Yeah, they are." She released his shoulder. "Can I tell the team?"

"Yeah," Peter affirmed, "I've got to finish some homework before training, just tell your dad we're going as friends so he doesn't get all, I don't know, _weird_ about it. Like girls' dads do. I'm not trying to upset him."

"I know." Cypra sighed. "He'll be fine. Go finish your homework." She slapped him on the arm playfully. "I'll see you at nine." She began heading back to the kitchen.

"Ok." Peter headed off the opposite direction.

Cypra entered the kitchen beaming, earning a "What happened?" from her dad.

"Well, Peter's homecoming date is being a bitch, so he asked me if I'd go with him instead and I said yes."

"You what?" Tony nearly dropped his tablet on the counter. Cypra could hear Bucky sigh quietly in frustration.

"Relax, it's not like a romantic thing, we're just going as friends. You realize he's like 6 years younger than me?" She reassured. "He just didn't want to feel left out. Plus, the school you sent me to didn't do fun things like that. So it's kind of like making up for lost time."

"You know you have to dress up for that kind of thing?" Tony told her.

"Yep," She sighed cheerlessly. "So yay me. Dress shopping. I don't even know how to shop." Cypra clattered he phone down on the counter next to her dad. "But at least money won't be an issue."

Tony smirked and kissed her gently on the head. "You are quite fortunate there."

"Can I go with you?" Wanda asked. "I know how to shop."

"Me too," Natasha offered. "I think I'm pretty good at it actually."

"You guys are angels." Cypra turned to them with profound relief. "Thank you so much."

"Plus, it'll be nice to get away from all the testosterone for a while." Natasha sipped her coffee.

Cypra disagreed, testosterone was what kept her sane. She couldn't stand being with lots of girls for long periods of time. She inched closer to Tony as Steve walked in the kitchen. "Are we ready?"

"It's only 7:30." Tony announced.

Steve must have noticed the annoyed look on Bucky's face and the slightly nervous one on Cypra's. "What's going on?"

"Peter asked Cypra to his homecoming dance at school." Bruce announced from the back of the room. He had otherwise been quiet all morning.

"Cute?" Steve asked hesitantly.

"Yeah it's adorable," Cypra agreed. "I'm just recruiting help for a dress."

Steve nodded his head like he understood, but Cypra knew he really didn't. Nobody did. She could feel Bucky's eyes on her as she made her way back to her seat, fresh cup of joe in hand.

"Relax." She hushed to him while normal conversation resumed in the room. "It's not serious."

"It better not be." Bucky told her in Romanian. "There will be consequences if he pulls something."

"I know." She patted his knee gently. She was going to avoid that at all costs.

Training was mundane for the next few days, Cypra had been working on her hand to hand combat and firearm skills so much in the last few weeks she felt like she could do it with her eyes closed. She wished she knew how to better control that curse of hers so she could focus on something else. She did yoga at 5am every day, an hour before everyone was supposed to be up, it was her time to reflect on her experiences and make sense of the world around her. She retreated to the roof of the facility to take in the fresh morning air. As she was deep in thought in her warrior pose, she heard a door close behind her. She whipped around ready to strike whoever had the nerve to sneak up on her like that. To her relief, it was just Steve.

"I didn't know you were up this early." He spoke with that smooth, clear, matter of fact tone of his.

"I didn't know you liked to follow people." Cypra snapped at him, breathing out and returning to her pose. More like why the fuck was _he_ up so early?

"I didn't mean to startle you." Steve apologized, "I heard the elevator ding and I got curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat, Rogers." She flared.

"I'm aware." He approached her and sat on the ledge. His hair blew in the wind, and his blue eyes were illuminated as the roof lights hit his face.

Cypra continued her yoga under the soldier's quiet watch, emptying her mind of all distractions and focusing on her breathing.

"How long have you done yoga?" Captain America inquired.

"When I was 15, I came home for the summer and my dad and I had a fight. Needless to say, I destroyed most of the house." She inhaled slowly and changed poses. After exhaling she continued. "Tony was desperate to find something that would calm me. He threw me into all of these classes, yoga ended up being the best fit."

"So, you don't know what your ability is?"

"No. You call it an ability, I call it a curse." Cypra replied coldly. "I've killed people."

"I think it's safe to say most of us here have." Steve settled.

"I've almost killed your best friend." Cypra moved to another pose. That caught his attention. "I wonder sometimes what would have happened if I did. Would you have come after me to avenge him? Would I have had to kill you too?"

Steve was silent, he looked down at his feet solemnly.

"Every book report in grade school, every research paper, every thesis for college-level history I wrote, was on you." Cypra confided. He looked up, meeting her eyes with sincerity and a bit of surprise. "I was worried I'd have to erase the only part of history I ever loved."

A smile eventually crept to Steve's face. "Cypra, what you can do is nothing to be feared. I for one, am a little fascinated by it."

Captain America had managed to make Cypra feel validated. What an interesting turn of events. Cypra had been fascinated by him most of her life, yet here he stood, flesh and bone, fascinated by her instead. She let her tears fall and took a slow, deep breath as she shook out of her pose. Steve stood and met her next to the mat. He seemed to tower over her a little making her a tad uncomfortable before he said, "Cypra," he put his forefinger and thumb between her jaw and gently raised her chin so she would look at him. "I know you think you're a liability; we've all felt that at one time. I know Bucky feels like that every day, and not just because of his arm." Steve was right. Cypra was beginning to feel dizzy looking into his eyes, each were like endless oceans of their own. She knew how to swim, but she was falling short on her endurance in the water. "We'll figure out how to channel it. I promise." He released her, the cold wind chilling her skin where his fingers had been. The two were silent for a minute until Steve cracked a smile, "Do you know what you're going to wear to that dance?"

"Hell no." She shook her head, laughing a little. "I don't even know _how_ to dance. My dad never taught me, I never needed to know." She shrugged.

"Come on," Steve slightly tilted his head smiling wider, "That's a skill everyone needs to know. It's easy."

Cypra looked at him and shook her head harder this time. "No its not."

"It is," He offered his hands to her calmly, "Can I teach you?"

Cypra knew this was going to be a defining moment in her life. Captain America was offering to teach her how to dance. This was most likely a once in a lifetime opportunity, and she knew she should just say yes before she talked herself out of it. She took his hands gently and gasped slightly as he pulled her towards him, positioning her hand on his shoulder and his on her waist, he clasped their other hands together and brought them out to the side a little. "You ready?"

Cypra was honestly speechless but she managed a quiet, "Yeah."

Steve began moving her side to side counting slowly. "One, two, three, four. One, two three, four. One, two, three, four." Cypra's bare feet were cold off of the mat on the concrete, but it was a small price to pay as Steve gently guided her, comforting and correcting her when she misstepped or stumbled a little. After a few minutes, she got the rhythm enough for Steve to twirl her and pull her back in. She was then smiling at her minor achievement, she needed more work, but for the time being, she was doing it. They sped up the pace, and there they were, dancing on the rooftop at 5:30 in the morning. Cypra loved how the cool wind felt in her hair and the warmth and comfort of Steve's hands played off of each other creating a feeling of content similar to when she was –

"Cypra." A sudden familiar voice broke her bliss. The super soldier stopped abruptly making Cypra trip over her feet and crash face first into his chest. She apologized and stepped away from him. Bucky stood, with an odd look on his face, eyes darting back and forth between Steve and Cypra until they finally settled on the woman.

Fuck.

"Your dad wants you, he's trying to run some algorithm but he keeps messing up or something and he's getting pissed off. He says you'd know where he's screwing up." The Winter Soldier explained.

Cypra sighed; back to reality it was. "I'll be there in a second." She squatted and began rolling up her yoga mat.

"We'll keep practicing," Steve assured her. "You're a quick learner."

Cypra stood with the mat under her arm and smiled. "And you're a good teacher."

Bucky was quiet the whole way down to the lab, Cypra hoped she hadn't upset him, but all in all her and Steve weren't doing anything wrong, it just _looked_ bad. She waltzed into the lab quickly corrected the algorithm, scolding Bruce and her dad playfully on how they should retake introduction to aerodynamics. Tony planted a kiss on her forehead. "How'd you get so smart?"

"Well, my dad's a genius for one." She replied, she knew she shouldn't be feeding his ego, but it was true, he had taught her all the basic blocks of STEM she later built on in college and the Air Force. "And I'm a high functioning autist. My brain is wired differently."

"True, and also true." He tugged her hair playfully and returned to typing. "See you at breakfast."

"You know it." She ushered Bucky out of the lab.

"So what's new with you and Steve?" Bucky led Cypra into the elevator.

"He's just teaching me how to dance in preparation for Peter's school event."

Bucky snorted amusingly, Cypra could tell there was a hint of jealousy in there. "Why are you even going to that again?"

"Because his date canceled." She replied irritably. "Look, I know you don't have empathy for people, but I do."

"Are you sure it's empathy and not _sympathy_?" Bucky's comeback lit a fire under her ass. She went to punch him, but her momentum was stopped abruptly by his metal arm. The man then pushed her back to the opposite side of the elevator. Before Cypra could push him back, the assassins mouth collided with hers and she was instantly breathless. The elevator dinged and opened for them to get out. She let Bucky drag her to his room, lock the door, and push her up against the wall, and kiss her more passionately than he had previously.

"I have to shower." Cypra's lame excuse didn't cut it this time.

"Let's shower then." Bucky began kissing her neck and across her jawline. His stubble tickled Cypra and she giggled, she could feel her face flush and she was unraveling with each brush of his lips. She began undressing, finally relieving herself of her now suffocating panties. They fell to the floor and Bucky followed suit, briefly breaking their kiss to get his shirt off. He gently ran his original hand down her back, squeezing her ass and slowly making his way to her most sensitive area. Cypra shuddered in pleasure and pulled his brunette hair harder, letting a moan escape her mouth as she felt the warmth of his fingertips on her clit. She was soaking wet, and he was moving his fingers in agonizingly slow circles. She spread her legs a little wider enjoying his touch and the large bulge through his pants against her hip.

Bucky undid his belt and zipper, as his pants clattered to the floor, Cypra took his erection through his underwear in one hand, gripping and stroking it at the same pace Bucky was rubbing her. He smiled mischievously and poked gently at her entrance. "I promise I'll try not to hurt you."

Cypra took his mouth back into hers for a second, enjoying the taste of him, "You're not going to." She informed him. "Trust me."

He entered slowly at first, angling his hand and wrist to hit her g spot with each thrust as he fingered her. Cypra squeezed her eyes shut and covered her mouth to keep from making any noise, but she was desperate to release something, anything. "All of this, for me?" Bucky met her eyes lustfully. "How long have you been waiting for me Cy?"

"Three years." She blurted, tears welling in her eyes. For three years she had practiced abstinence in hopes she would see him again. She was getting close. "I'm gonna come."

"Come then." Bucky demanded, speeding his pace and thrusting his fingers into her even faster and deeper than he had before. Cypra was doing her absolute best to keep quiet, but a desperate noise came from her mouth as she orgasmed, ejecting fluid from her opening onto Bucky's hand and she felt it run down the inside of her legs.

She was weak; time and space were almost non-existent as Bucky carried her to the shower and started the water. The initial cold spray woke her up a little and she gently tugged at his tight-fitting, dri-fit underwear. Bucky pulled them off and allowed a strikingly large member spring loose. Cypra's eyes widened a little, she was intimidated by the size, but if she had taken it before she could take it again. A little daunted, she got down on her knees, letting the warm water hit her back as she took him in her mouth. Bucky simultaneously gripped the support bar in the shower and her wet hair. She looked up at him watching his eyes glaze over in intense pleasure, taking in more and more of his genitalia each time she pulled him into her mouth. Her other hand was complimenting her blowjob, stroking him as she pulled out and resting as she took him back in. Soon she had him all the way down her throat, cutting off her oxygen supply momentarily as she serviced the older man. Bucky gripped her hair tightly, "Cy," He pulled her off of him. It was amazing the control she had over the Soviet-trained assassin. It was a power trip, and she was a little sad he ended it.

She caught her breath and smiled at his desire. "I get it. It's nothing like the real thing." She stood and turned, back facing him. "I would like to walk out of here without limping."

He pushed her against the shower wall laughing a little. "I'll do my best; no promises." Bucky prodded for a moment and then Cypra gasped as he entered her, filling and stretching her in ways she had forgotten.

"James." She breathed. "Holy shit I forgot how big you were."

Bucky kissed her neck from behind, pumping in and out slowly and evenly at first. "I forgot how ridiculously tight you were." He began teasing her, moving at different paces and depths to get her body used to him. Finally, Cypra couldn't handle it anymore.

"Faster," She demanded. He complied. "Harder." He complied with that also. Soon she was chest against the cold shower tile, feeling the warm water pour on them both as he slammed into her over and over sending her into an earth-shattering feeling of pure ecstasy. After a few minutes, she felt his pace change.

"Cypra." He warned.

She was close also. "I know, I know, me too." A few thrusts later, Cypra could feel him eject his seed into her. This launched her body into an orgasm so intense she actually blacked out. She came to, sitting down with the shower turned off and a towel wrapped around her.

"Are you ok?" Bucky helped her up. "You went limp."

Cypra's world was spinning. "Yeah." Her throat was sore. "I was on cloud nine." She must have seemed a little upset because Bucky looked her square in the eyes.

"Cypra, I didn't just…cross a boundary. Did I?" The sincerity woke her out of her daze.

"No," she shook her head and traced his chest with her finger. "I wanted it, and I had been lying to myself about it for weeks."

Bucky pulled her in and kissed her gently. "Me too, your dad is so goddamn nosy."

"Tell me about it." Cypra rolled her eyes, then gasped, "Oh fuck, breakfast! FRIDAY what time is it?"

"5:53 am Ms. Stark."

"We got 7 minutes!" Cypra hurriedly threw her clothes back on. "I got to get to my room."

"Ok, I'll see you in a bit then." Bucky began redressing as well, grinning at her intensity.

Cypra sprinted to her room, threw on new clothes, blow-dried her hair best she could, and applied her makeup, all while nursing a sore throat, and trying to regain her composure.

She walked into the kitchen coolly and began getting what she wanted to eat. Bucky was already at the table and the rest of the team was scattered in between the dining and living room. Steve handed her thermos to her already filled with hot coffee and creamer. "Crème brulee, right?"

Cypra paused, she could see Bucky look up from her peripheral vision. "Yes, thank you." She accepted the thermos and knew was losing her voice. "You're so thoughtful, Steve." The super soldier smiled back at her.

"Force of habit." He shrugged.

"Are you alright? You sound like you have a cold." Tony turned around on the couch to face her.

Bucky buried his face in his mug trying to stifle his laughter.

"You're a dick." She told him, barely audible. That just made the laughter worse. Cypra scolded herself for walking into that one.

"It's allergies, I was dusting the vent in my room." She lied to her dad. She really was allergic to dust though, in that moment she had never been more grateful for that.

"What's funny, Barnes?" Tony challenged.

"Nothing." Bucky managed a straight face. "She just sounds weird."

Natasha wasn't buying it, but Cypra could tell she also didn't want to know.

Cypra was strangely comfortable next to Steve in the kitchen, but as his eyes met hers she felt a wave of unsolicited guilt flood over her. She was suddenly angry at herself. This would be the second or third time she allowed herself to be manipulated by James. She couldn't help her longing for him, but she could help her own self-control. She wondered if Steve would be mad at Bucky if he found out they were sleeping together. He was almost 100 years older than her.

She sat down and put earbuds into her ears, she needed something to take her thoughts away from what had just happened.

Metallica it was.

* * *

 **Spicy enough? Hope so! Hope everyone is enjoying reading this as much as I'm enjoying writing it. I realize the word count on this thing is ridiculous, but as I've matured, my writing and therefore accuracy and attention to detail have matured also. Still looking for a beta, PM me if interested.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Konnichiwa, thanks for being so patient! I've noticed a staggering lack of reviews; do you guys like it? Hate it? I need to know because that will help me decide my future writing projects. I'm also open to story ideas, suggestions, or questions regarding things that you guys write as well! I'm not scary, I promise. Regarding these last few chapters, be prepared for things to get really intense really quickly. Some of you might even shake your head a little at the actions of our protagonists. That's good. I WANT that reaction. Some things will be revealed that you may or may not like. That's ok too. The beauty of writing a story is that it's yours. Enjoy.**

 **Iconic vine of the day: Interviewer: "Who's the hottest Uber driver you've ever had?" **Boy stands for a second and thinks** "Um, I never went to oovoo javer."**

* * *

Steve woke up slowly at first, stretching his sore back muscles, Bucky had hit him pretty hard with that metal arm during training. Steve still wondered if his friend had done that on purpose or just gotten too excited. He grunted slightly as he sat up. The recent couple of mornings had become Steve's favorite part of the day. He donned a dark t-shirt and some Nike joggers before combing his hair back and brushing his teeth. The soldier slipped out into the hallway and took the stairs to the roof. He opened the access door quietly as not to disturb Cypra during her yoga routine. She shook out as she finished, Steve knew that then he could talk.

"Good morning, Captain." Cypra slipped on her socks and shoes.

"Good morning," He rotated a shoulder backwards to stave off the irritated muscle. "You want to try going faster today?" Steve approached her evenly, hands in his pockets. It was chillier outside today than yesterday.

"It's tomorrow night. The dance." The woman blurted nervously. "And you're not Peter, what if I trip over him?"

"Chances are, if one of you does make a mistake, you'll trip over each other." He rotated the other shoulder, this was going to be a pain to deal with. "You'll recover."

"Are you ok?" Cypra stepped behind him and ran her fingers across his shoulder blades. The hair on the back of Steve's neck stood straight up, and he felt his body tense up. "You've got some swelling. How hard did he hit you yesterday?" The striking concern and slight anger in her voice made Steve wish he hadn't moved his shoulder at all.

"Pretty hard," Steve confessed. "I think he got a little too enthusiastic about the training."

She came back around to his front, she wouldn't make eye contact with him. It was like perhaps she knew something Steve didn't. "He's acting weird, but-" She stopped herself. "Anyways, are you ready?" She took the soldier's hands into hers.

Steve felt a strange tightness in his chest as he pulled her close, the lights reflected off of her green gold eyes and he hesitated, preparing his mind to teach her. "One," They stepped as they both counted. "Two, three, four."

Two minutes in, they were flying. Every step was perfectly calculated; every spin was balanced with extreme precision. Everything was beginning to move in slow motion again. Steve's brain brought forth a memory.

" _I'm going to need a rain check on that dance." Captain America was lowering the plane to the ice._

" _Alright, a week next Saturday at the Stork Club." She agreed._

" _You got it."_

" _Eight O'clock on the dot. Don't you dare be late. Understood?" Peggy's voice echoed in his head._

" _You know I still don't know how to dance."_

" _I'll show you how." She promised._

Steve had never gotten that opportunity; he woke up in a radically different world. He spent countless hours teaching himself how to dance in hopes that one day…

He watched the woman in front of her, the girl his friend Bucky was so in tune with, the girl his friend Tony raised and held so close to his heart. How lucky was he to get this chance? He rarely got to immerse himself in other people's lives like this. However, this was something that he was beginning to lose control over. Should he stop? Should he bury his head in planning training and never look up again? He didn't know how to approach this. He didn't want to face it. Steve wanted to control it, before it controlled him.

Cypra let him go. "Steve?"

The solder snapped back to reality.

"Are you ok? I think I've got it now. Thank you for teaching me I would've been totally screwed." She pushed some hair out of her eyes.

"I'm more than ok." He smiled at her. "I successfully taught someone to dance."

Cypra laughed and pushed his chest playfully. "Alright Sensei. Well, I owe you one."

Some laughter escaped Steve's mouth. "Oh, I don't know about _sensei._ " He got serious as he took one of her hands in his. _"_ And you don't owe me anything _._ " He squeezed it gently. "It was a pleasure."

Cypra blinked twice and smiled, looking off to their feet as she did. Steve could tell she was blushing. "God you're so polite." That made Steve chuckle a little. She shook her head and sucked a breath in. "If there's anything I can do for you. Let me know." She made solid eye contact with him. Steve's heart seemed to skip like the records he and Bucky would play at his house in high school.

Steve jumped at the opportunity without even thinking. "Well…there _is_ this new Italian place on 7th in NYC I've been wanting to try, I just don't want to make the drive over there by myself."

Steve prepared to be rejected. This had happened numerous times before. He didn't even know why he was asking her out. He scolded himself for jumping the gun. Why on earth would she even be interested in him? She probably just saw him as a role model or museum artifact.

"Hell yeah, I love Italian food!" She rolled up her mat. "I'll just take my dad's card, no point in paying for shit when your dad's a freaking billionaire. He won't miss it." She stood. "Sorry about my mouth."

Steve couldn't believe his ears. Cypra had just agreed to dinner with him.

"I-it's ok." He stuttered like an idiot. "Sunday?"

"Sunday." She nodded. "Finally, someone else who likes to deviate from Tony's cooking every now and then." She elbowed him playfully. "I'll see you at breakfast in 45." She left the roof promptly, Steve knew it took her about that much time to prepare herself for the day.

Steve sighed, finally admitting defeat. Why was it so easy this time? And why on such short notice? He was fine until she had mentioned being afraid of having to kill him.

Steve Rogers was beginning to fall.

* * *

Cypra felt the intensity of the water pressure hit her back. She tossed her head back into the stream and let the water run down her head, down her back, down her legs to her feet. On Elvheim she remembered having to bathe in a cold stream, she had forgotten what a luxury showering was.

The shower door slid open suddenly, "Cypra," a groggy voice presented itself.

The woman nearly jumped out of her skin. "James! You scared the hell out of me." She smacked him on the shoulder irritably. "What?"

Bucky smiled sleepily. "Where'd you go?"

"Yoga." She told him. "Dance lessons. Like every morning."

He was quiet for a moment. "Hey."

Cypra stopped washing her hair and looked at him. He was serious.

"Is Steve…coming on to you at all." He inquired. His expression was still tired but sincere.

Cypra didn't exactly know what he meant 'coming on to her'. As far as she was concerned he was being really nice. He wasn't rude or pushy with her in the least. "No." She frowned. "Why would you even ask that. Steve is like the nicest person ever." She slathered herself in soap. She flashed back to the super soldier's eyes, how often she got lost in them and then his gentle squeeze of her hand. She admired him, but that seemed to be all.

Bucky chuckled, "I know he is. I just want to make sure he knows that you're off limits."

Cypra froze. So that's what he meant 'coming on to her'. "Oh, you think he _likes_ me?" She began moving herself again slowly, rinsing off the soap.

"Maybe. Maybe I'm just paranoid. I don't know, I just got you back." Bucky stretched his arms above his head for a minute. Cypra admired his build, her face flushed a little. Everything was screaming at her to coax him in there with her, but she knew she didn't have time. "I just don't want him swooping in with his charm."

Cypra laughed, "He _is_ charming, I'll give him that. He's got that childlike innocence vibe."

"See?" Bucky's voice lowered.

"James." Cypra turned off the water, and began drying herself off enjoying the look on her lover's face as the steam cleared, revealing her completely naked body. She cloaked the towel around her and wrapped the Winter Soldier in a hug. "I'm yours, nobody is going to take me from you."

Bucky used both arms to pull her closer. Cypra could feel him through her towel, so she slipped a hand down to his erection, gently stroking upwards. She knew she was being cruel but she was so fascinated by the hardness of him she couldn't help herself. Cypra felt him tense up.

"We don't have time." He informed her.

"I know," she replied disappointingly. She stopped teasing him. "I can't help it I'm sorry."

He let her go, only to pull her into a kiss. "Don't be. I like it."

A loud knock on the door startled them both.

"Stay in here and be _silent._ " She whispered to him, but she knew she didn't have to give an ex-assassin very many instructions. He knew what to do. Cypra wrapped the towel around her tighter and closed the door to the bathroom quietly. She ran to the door, opening it with a press of a button, her hair still dripping. It was Steve. She wrapped her towel around her even tighter. "Hey."

Steve looked a little startled. "I didn't know you were in the shower, sorry."

"I just got out, it's fine. What's up?"

"Have you seen Bucky? He's not in his room."

Cypra shook her head, "I came straight here. He should show up for breakfast, why? What's wrong?"

"I just wanted to talk to him about training yesterday." Steve stood a little straighter, his pectoralis muscles protruding. "Figured I'd do it before we ate."

"He's probably asleep somewhere." Cypra rolled her eyes. "Or you know…it is morning. I know boys like their privacy in the morning." She winked.

Steve immediately looked uncomfortable. "I didn't even think about that. There was this one time in Wakanda I..." He heaved in a breath with a disturbed look on his face. "I'll see you at breakfast." He went to leave but then caught himself and spun back around. "I know you just got here, but that Italian place is like a business casual attire I just read. I'm going to have to go shopping."

Cypra laughed. "Yeah, Maximoff, Romanoff, and I spent four and a half thousand dollars at the mall the other day looking for my dress. I pretty much bought a new wardrobe."

Steve shook his head. "You really are a Stark."

Cypra smacked him playfully clicking her tongue. "Get out of here Rogers, I still have to get dressed."

"Of course, your highness." He smirked.

She rolled her eyes and shut the door. She waited until his footsteps weren't audible to open the bathroom door. Bucky stood arms crossed with a mixture or hurt and rage in his eyes. "He's flirting with you."

"No he's not." Cypra dropped her towel and began looking for her Under Armor training wear.

"Yes he is. I know him better than you do." Bucky's voice was cold.

She couldn't argue with that.

"And what is this about an 'Italian place?" He sat on her bed, looking more and more furious by the second.

Cypra dressed quickly, "Oh, well, I told him I owed him one for teaching me how to dance. He asked me if I wanted to try this new place in NYC on 7th with him because he didn't want to go by himself."

"He asked you on a date and you accepted." Bucky stated.

The young woman froze again, her pants halfway up. Did she just agree to a date? It didn't come off that way when he asked her. "No, it's not a date, we're just trying this new place."

"This new place." Bucky began, "For dinner, at a nice restaurant, in business casual attire."

Cypra realized then that she had been played like a goddamn violin. "That son of a bitch." She said under her breath as she pulled her pants all the way up. "He made it sound like it was no big deal."

"Cypra Alise." Bucky raised his voice. "This is exactly what I was afraid was going to happen. I can't even trust my best friend around you."

"I swear I had no idea!" Cypra raised her voice with his as she protested. "He's fucking smooth, holy shit." She was dumbfounded. "But I can't just back out of it now, I owe him one!"

Bucky was quiet, clearly seething.

"I know you're mad because I-."

"I'm mad because he manipulated you. He took advantage of the fact that if he taught you how to dance, you would feel obligated to make it even." Bucky spat.

"I don't think that's what he…look, he told me that I didn't owe him anything at first, but I persisted. I was just trying to make it right. I mean, he took time out of his morning that could've been used nursing his shoulder blades because you hit him so damn hard, to teach me something my own father failed to do." Cypra didn't know why she was defending him.

Bucky stood suddenly and approached her closely. She hated it when he got in her face like that. "I hit him because he wouldn't stop staring at you." His voice was low and threatening. His possessiveness of her was starting to get a little frightening. Cypra became very nervous, she hated fighting him, it was painful and it had always left a part of her broken.

"You got about 6 seconds to get the fuck out of my face and leave the room, you're starting to get out of control." She looked him dead in his beautifully cold eyes. "Don't _ever_ get this close to me again with that tone." She warned, she didn't want to get angry. Bad things always happened when she got angry.

Bucky took a slow deep breath in and out through his nose, shaking a little. He left quietly, the door sliding shut behind him.

It was going to be a long day today.

Cypra sat in the living room away from the table. Steve was trying to talk to Bucky, but the ex-assassin kept blowing him off, eventually, he sat on the opposite end of the table with a newspaper and his coffee.

"You alright?" A gentle voice sat next to Cypra. It was Wanda.

"Yeah, you look really upset." Natasha sat on her other side. "And you do a really good job being expressionless most of the day."

"You guys are going to have to promise to keep this between us, and keep your voices low, nobody else needs to hear this. I just need help from other women because I've made a mistake." Cypra hated asking for help. She was very independent all of the time, and her independence is what let her excel in the military.

"We're listening." Wanda said slowly but quietly.

"I think Steve asked me on a date, and I told him yes."

Natasha lowered her cup to the table. Wanda almost choked on hers. "What?" The witch looked kind of bewildered.

"Look, I had no idea how to slow dance, so to avoid looking like an idiot at Peter's school thing tomorrow I let Steven teach me for these last few days." She confessed. "I finally have it down and I told him I owed him one and he just made it sound like we were going to try this cool new Italian place on 7th because he didn't want to go by himself, and it was going to be no big deal. Then James brought to my attention that it was a date because it was dinner at a nice place and I have to dress up."

Natasha put her head in her hands for a second. "Cypra."

"I just can't believe I was manipulated like that-."

"Cypra." Natasha called again.

The First lieutenant looked at the spy.

"He's been hardcore flirting with you for almost a week during training. You honestly didn't know?" The black widow apprized her.

"He wasn't flirting with me; he was being nice." She protested.

"No." The witch and the spy said together.

"We know him." Wanda sat up a little. "We thought you knew."

Cypra stared at the coffee table feeling trapped in her own mind. She had spent the last 3 years dealing with tyrants, gods, and other barbaric civilizations. She had become oblivious to men hitting on her, on Elvheim, everyone respected her, none of the men there would even think to pull that kind of crap on one of the God of Thunder's friends. She shook her head gently as tears filled her eyes. What kind of shit had she just gotten herself into? Steve and Bucky were going to end up killing each other over this, or at least killing their close bond.

Wanda put an arm around her. "We're here for you, don't worry."

"Is this where the premenstrual club meets every month?" Tony seemed rather chipper as he entered the living room, eyeing the solemn women.

"Dad shut up you're so immature." Cypra snapped at him. "Seriously, grow up."

The living and dining room quieted. Tony's face went from smart-ass to concern in a split second as he saw she was crying. "What happened?" When she didn't answer he looked over at Bucky. "What did he do to you?"

Bucky sat, ignoring him, but he looked equally concerned with Cypra's tears.

"Nothing dad. Fuck off."

Tony sighed and went to the kitchen. Cypra knew he was in no mood to fight with her.

"You're still upset with him?" Natasha took a sip of her drink, flipping some of her short blond hair to the side.

Cypra sniffed. "He just doesn't understand the dynamic of my relationship with James, who's furious about this, in case you couldn't infer that on your own."

"He's just trying to protect you." Wanda told her. "It's obvious he holds you very close to him."

Cypra nodded and smiled through her tears. "It's mutual."

* * *

 **Ok, I know this is a shorter chapter, but I cut it here because next chapter is the homecoming dance and we're going to completely switch gears! On a serious note, please review I would LOVE to hear your feedback! I know at least 30 people are reading this, maybe more, but that's a lot of differing opinions because you are all so unique! I've already started the next chapter so it should be out shortly, sorry about the wait.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi all! Sorry it's been so long on this chapter, I just found out that I'm pregnant again. :/ My boyfriend and I are in total shock as we did not plan/expect this. We were actually being really careful and I was a week out from getting birth control. This is a fucking disaster. Don't get pregnant ladies it's really not worth it.**

 **Then, I was going to upload this chapter late yesterday but my son ended up having a severe allergic reaction to (we think) broccoli, so we spent the whole afternoon into nighttime in the hospital and at Walgreens. He's doing much better now.**

 **This chapter is going to be a little faster paced. We're going to focus on two parties of people, Cy and Peter, and Steve and Bucky **TRIGGER WARNING** for psychological,** **intense sexual** **, and physical abuse. If you have suffered any sexual abuse, please skip the part. I will label the sexual abuse beforehand and afterward; it will be in bold and capitalized so everybody has plenty of warning. PSA for rated M content. Don't like it? Don't read it. This is going to be a** _ **long**_ **chapter. 5k words.**

 **Iconic Vine of the day: Guy: "So I was sitting there; barbeque sauce on my titties-" **black girl begins laughing uncontrollably****

* * *

"You look good." Natasha fastened the dress behind Cypra. "I don't think I could pull that off."

Cypra rolled her eyes, the spy could pull _everything_ off. Her physique was the most sought after by women her age. Wanda pulled the young woman's hair back, braiding and twisting until it was an intricate ball on the back of her head, a few strings hung loosely by her ears. "Do you feel ok? You're not going to have a breakdown with Peter are you?"

Cypra really couldn't promise anything. In the last day, Bucky had been refusing to talk to her or Steve at all. She knew she had hurt him, however, she didn't mean to. Alternatively, she didn't regret accepting Steve's proposition for dinner. She found herself excited to sit down at a nice establishment, maybe have a glass of wine, and ask all the things she ever wanted to ask Captain America. Bucky never understood her fascination with the super soldier because he had known Steve his whole life up until the time he was wiped. "I think I'll be ok." Cypra stared at her dark eye makeup and then at her dragon tattoo. "Do you think I should cover that with concealer?"

"Why?' Wanda asked. "I think it just adds to your look."

"I think it sets you apart from the other girls out there." Natasha chimed in. "You're a grown woman, not a little teenager."

Cypra nodded, partially smiling. She felt tears coming up so she took a deep breath. "Thank you guys for your help."

"No, don't cry!" Wanda excitedly wrapped her in a hug. "You're going to make me cry! Plus, you'll ruin your makeup." Wanda had spent over an hour putting it all together.

"I'm not going to cry," Cypra stated, more so to herself than Wanda. "I've just been an emotional wreck. I'll get over it." The witch pulled away.

Natasha rubbed Cypra's arm affectionately, she didn't do much hugging unless she really knew the person. "Just forget about the boys. Tonight is about you and Peter, so, just have fun. It's a first for both of you."

Cypra stepped into the hallway, she didn't like how her dad was practically staring at her as she approached him and Peter, but she was glad the rest of the team were off doing something. Peter wore a nice shirt with dress pants. He seemed taller and his clothing added a level of maturity to him Cypra had never seen before. Wanda and Natasha were on her heels, just to provide support.

"I forgot how you looked in a dress. You're stunning." Tony turned to Peter who had yet to take his eyes off of her. "Isn't she?"

"Y-yeah, she looks amazing." Peter cleared his throat.

"Don't try anything." Tony warned him.

"I won't, sir."

Cypra shot her father an annoyed look. "It's a school dance dad, we're not going clubbing." Peter cracked an amused smile.

Tony reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He handed Cypra a shiny silver card. "100 grand. Don't max it. I already called a limo."

Peter's mouth nearly dropped to the floor.

"I promise I'm not going to spend a hundred thousand dollars." Cypra tucked it into her bra. She pulled her father into a hug, "I'm done being mad at you, but please, please stay off of James' ass while I'm gone."

"Did something happen between him and spangles? They're being kind of…cold, to each other." The billionaire inquired.

Cypra sighed and let him go. "I agreed to go to dinner tomorrow night with Steve in exchange for a favor he did for me. James, in case you haven't noticed, is very protective of me and he doesn't like the idea of me going to NYC without him." She lied.

"What kind of favor?" Tony crossed his arms.

"It was nothing illegal." Cypra assured him. She had a bad rap for talking people into doing illegal things for her.

"Better not have been young lady, you're already in trouble with the Air Force."

This was true, her command was mostly sympathetic to her absence as they assumed she was killed by HYDRA, but a few people liked to use the phrase AWOL. Some people were questioning whether she should get court-martialed, but Cypra was confident that when she, Bucky, and Thor discussed it with the president, he would understand.

' _Young lady.'_ Cypra seethed quietly. "Are you ready Peter?"

The teen smiled, extending his elbow you Cypra could grab onto his arm. The woman kissed her father, thanked Nat and Wanda once more, and her and the teen turned and made it to the entrance, shiny black Hummer limo waiting for them.

The chauffeur emerged from the driver's seat, opened the door and allowed the two inside. It was much nicer than a regular limousine. Neon lights ran on the top and bottom of the interior and the seats were made of a certain fine leather only Tony would approve of. Cypra immediately opened a bottle of scotch and poured herself a glass. She offered Peter a sip, but he shook he shook head. "Cypra, look, I don't know what's going on with you and metal arm guy-."

"His name is Bucky; I am the only one who gets away with calling him James." She corrected him. "And it's adult business so you don't need to worry about it."

Peter was quiet as the vehicle began moving. "All I was going to say, was that I'm here if you want to talk about it, and I promise I'll keep it between us."

Cypra felt a pang of guilt as she finished her scotch, pouring yet another glass. Peter didn't deserve her animosity. She composed herself and turned to the teen, and put a hand on his knee. "What I meant to say was 'thank you' for caring, and you look very nice."

The teen smiled at her briefly. "I get it if you don't want to talk about it either and focus on something else." He pulled out his phone, "We can always check out Reddit." He shrugged. "And just for your information, you're like, the hottest girl I've ever met."

Cypra almost choked on her drink, laughing. They both were. Somehow, she could be the shittiest mood ever, but that kid would always drag her out of it, and it was going to be a long drive to Queens.

* * *

Bucky lounged on his bed, reading a book; _1984_ by George Orwell. It was recommended to him by Steve who had a seemingly endless list of things the two needed to watch, read, or listen to, to properly catch up on the 21st Century.

" _Until they become conscious they will never rebel, and until after they have rebelled they cannot become conscious."_

Bucky's head fell back against the headboard as the words triggered a flashback.

 ****SEXUAL ABUSE TRIGGER WARNING ****

" _Who do you belong to, Soldat?" A man spoke to him in Russian. It was well below freezing, however, Bucky was in his cell, pants down, sweating as his handler was slamming into him from behind. Bucky didn't let the tears come to his eyes, his handler wasn't worth what little emotion he had left. He wasn't going to let him win. The man behind him grabbed his long hair and yanked him back roughly. "Who do you belong to, Soldat?" The man repeated, this time, with impatience._

" _HYDRA." Bucky choked out, as his prostate was hit, over and over, sending a chill down his back and warmth to his unwanted erection. He swore he wasn't going to let the man tip him over the cliff like last time. He was going to stay strong. This had been going on for days since HYDRA recaptured him from Berlin. They had stripped all of his privileges and he was confined to a dirty cell, only getting oatmeal and an orange for breakfast, and a stale bread roll and some meat stew for dinner. He was working out almost 14 hours a day now with little water, and a couple of protein bars, and was confined to that machine for the rest of the day undergoing intense electroshock 'therapy'._

 _The only thing that occupied his thoughts, was Cypra. The only thing that got him off of the ground in the morning was Cypra. He was cold, near starvation, and bruised nearly everywhere on his body for defecting. Incredibly, what tortured him the most, was the guilt of leaving her in Berlin so suddenly._

" _Yes, but more importantly,_ who _owns you?" The man behind him quickened his pace._

" _You do, sir." Bucky finally told him. The faster he complied, the faster it was over with. Soon, the man began stroking the winter soldier's erection. This was new. There was no way he was going to fight it off this time; the drive had left his body, and so he gave in. His handler continued to thrust, laughing to himself as Bucky became desperate to release. Finally, after what felt like hours, relief flooded him. He swore as he came onto the wall in front of him, panting as it dripped down his member on to the man's hand. His handler let out a breath and unloaded into him, promptly exiting the assassin. Bucky slumped to the ground, naked, humiliated, defeated, and again stripped of any dignity he ever thought he had._

 _The man slammed the cell door shut on his way out, sucking the cum off of his fingers. "Man, he really enjoys our time together." He told the guards outside, mocking him._

 _Bucky broke down, burying his head in his arms on top of his knees crying, shaking more from the rage than the cold. He closed his eyes remembering her smell, her gentle touch, the way she cuddled into his chest at night. His handler had given the news to him yesterday. They had intercepted her at the market. They had captured her, raped her, slit her throat, and threw her body into a river. He suddenly felt sick and heaved over, vomiting what little food he had in his stomach. The assassin had truly wished for death in that very moment. At least then he could be with her._

 ****END OF TRIGGER****

A knock at the door startled Bucky. He was thrown back to reality and immediately felt guilty for the way he had been treating Cypra and Steve. "Come in."

Natasha entered, bringing him some fruit, a granola bar, and a bottle of water. She put the food on the night table beside him. "You need to eat." She snatched the book out of his hands inspecting it and giving the paperback a disapproving look. Bucky was done reading it for today anyway. "And you don't need to be reading books like this until you've done some more therapy."

Bucky appreciated her concern, but he really didn't want to see anyone but Cypra right now, but she was off with Peter, much to his discontent. Natasha made him a little nervous for some reason. "I need to be alone right now."

"You've been alone all day Barnes; Steve was worried about you so he sent me."

"I can take care of myself." He protested.

Natasha sat next to him and put a hand on his thigh. "The thing is, you don't always have to. It's ok to let people help you." Bucky stiffened and gently removed it. The spy smiled. "I know you're loyal to her. I was just trying to comfort you. It didn't mean anything."

"Loyal to her?" Bucky repeated.

Natasha chuckled. "Barnes, it's my job to know things."

Bucky glared at her. How could she have possibly figured it out already? Cypra and Bucky spent most of the day carrying on normal conversation. Never smiling at each other, and definitely not touching each other.

"However, it's also my job to keep quiet about them." She assured him. She suddenly smirked. "Plus I think it's cute watching you two interact."

"What's so special about how we interact?" The ex-assassin inquired, opening his granola bar and taking a bite.

"The way you look at her. The way you're so quick to take a bullet for her in training." Natasha confessed. "You love her."

Bucky wasn't going to pretend that was an absurd statement, but he also wasn't going to pretend it was a correct one. "I don't know if I'm capable of love."

Natasha pushed some hair behind her ear. "If you only want what's best for her, and you feel like she brings the best out of you. That's love. If you're compatible at a level people could never understand, if you've shown her all of your demons. You love her. If you trust her with your life, and you would happily lose yours for her…you love her."

Bucky was able to check off all of those boxes. Maybe he was capable of love after all. He doubted it, but he was never really able to describe how he felt about her. Maybe it was love and this was the first time he was experiencing it. The first emotion he felt when he thought about her was an overwhelming need to protect and care for her. Then it was a heart softening feeling of comfort. That then turned into an intense need to feel validated by her. Then it was to pleasure her, watch her unravel beneath him…he shifted uncomfortably trying to hide his budding hard on.

Natasha stood. "I know it's not my business, but I hope you find peace and comfort in her, just as much as she does in you. She loves you also, Barnes."

He met the Black Widow's eyes. "Thank you."

She nodded and promptly left the room.

Bucky sighed quietly and slipped his hands down his pants, stroking himself as he thought of her.

" _James," She moaned in desperation as he slid in and out of her missionary style on top of the kitchen table. "Oh god." She moved her head from side to side, clearly trying to process the sensory information. It was two in the morning, she had woken him up with a blowjob. They hadn't had sex in a few days, so Bucky assumed at the time she'd just gotten randomly horny. He would later come to understand from research that one of the very earliest signs of pregnancy was increased sex drive._

" _You're close." He hummed in her ear and smiled watching her green-gold eyes begin to lose their focus. "Cypra Alise."_

" _Fuck." The woman arched her back as she came, squirting fluid onto both of them, releasing a moan that sent him hurdling into bliss inside her. He collapsed on her naked body, both of them panting and laughing, and kissing. It was warm inside and Bucky remembered wishing he could poof HYDRA out of existence and live here, just the two of them, forever._

Bucky grunted lightly as he came on his stomach, feeling immediate relief from the pressure that had been building in him for a few days. He wiped himself clean with a tissue and tossed it in the wastebasket.

He decided to go find Steve. He swallowed his anger and betrayed feelings remembering that Steve had no clue about the nature of his relationship with Cypra. It was better to just let him take her out so he wouldn't draw attention to himself. The thought of his best friend getting with the woman he was so deeply attached to, however, infuriated him to a level he himself didn't even understand. He knew Steve was very respectful around women, he just hoped that he didn't advance on her. "Hey." He stood next to the super soldier on the balcony, overlooking the forest.

"Bucky, I'm sorry." The soldier apologized.

"For what?" Bucky was caught off guard.

"I know you just want to protect her and I should have spoken to you before asking her out to a place so far away from the facility." He admitted. "I feel like maybe I crossed a boundary I didn't even know was there."

Bucky sighed, Steve really had no idea at all. "Just promise me you'll keep her safe. If a faction of HYDRA is out there somewhere and they see her…you know, you're not supposed to know this."

"Buck." Steve looked him dead in the eyes. "I will die before I let her die or be taken by them."

The sincerity and conviction in his eyes made Bucky's well up with tears. He really couldn't have asked for a better friend.

Bucky wiped his eyes with his palms. "You don't know how much she means to me. I can't really describe it."

Steve put an arm around his friend. "You're right, I don't. But the way you feel about protecting her was the way I felt about protecting you when you were framed."

Bucky was slowly starting to understand. It surpassed all logic, his need to keep her safe and to…love her. He knew he wasn't on good terms with Tony, her father, and he didn't care. There was a part of him that wanted stability in his life, then once he realized that they almost had a baby…he needed her. To know that Steve at least felt some of that, was incredibly eye-opening.

* * *

Cypra and Peter stood awkwardly in front of each other in the crowded cafeteria as the song changed from fast pace to slow. It was crowded, people moved past them and around them. Earlier Peter had been bombarded with his friends asking questions and gawking at the older woman. She had just stood, smiling, and wanting to punch every last one of them in the throat. She had almost forgotten how disgusting teenage boys were, and how much she hated them.

"Uh." Peter cleared his throat. "Do you want to dance or sit this one out."

Cypra put a hand on his shoulder and offered him her other one. This was the moment all those mornings on the rooftops with Steve had been training her for. Peter accepted and the two began to dance.

' _One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four.' Again the wind was in Cypra's hair as Steve spun her around the rooftop. The scent of him filed her nostrils, she didn't know why but he always smelled so good. She let his strength pull her close and push her away again. Each time she met his eyes, she fell deeper and deeper into them. Soon, she found herself on a boat in the middle of the Arctic cold, but unafraid. Steve had her wrapped into his arms from behind, his breath in her ear as he whispered over the wind, and in his infinite warmth, she actually began to melt._

Oh no.

"Cypra-." Peter snapped her out of it.

Cypra jolted a bit, confused as she came back to her senses. She knew she was a little drunk, but this daydreaming had started to become a real issue during the day. Steve and Bucky simultaneously occupied the space in her brain so much, she didn't have room for anything else it felt like. "Yeah sorry, what's up?"

"The song's over. You did amazing." He took her hand and led her past the crowds of people into the hallway where rows of lockers met them. Cypra felt bad for not being as engaged as she should've been. It was just her mind playing footage over and over all night long. It was giant dinners with Thor, dancing with Steve, and cold nights with Bucky, gunfire, sex, blood, pleasure, wind, rain, thunder, Elvheim, Germany, New York. It was all packed so tightly together. "Hey," Peter squeezed her hand. "you're shaking, what's going on?"

Cypra looked down at her trembling hands. "I need a drink."

Peter met her eyes with concern. He stood for a moment and nodded. "Ok, I can take you somewhere if you're done with the loud music. It's starting to hurt my ears too. I get overstimulated easily."

Peter pulled something out of his left pocket. It was a vape pen. "This is OG, it works wonders for me when I'm stressed. You don't have to take it but you kind of look like you're having a PTSD episode."

PTSD. It made perfect sense. Cypra reached for the pen and took a 5 second hit, hoping it would slow the neurons in her brain. "Does my dad know you have this thing?"

"He was the one who gave it to me."

Cypra laughed and shook her head. "Typical Stark behavior. My dad regularly disregards the rules around minors unless it's sex related."

"I think I'm starting to see that." Peter smirked. "But Cap would be disappointed in us so it's a secret."

The relief was instantaneous. Cypra smiled. "Cap would be totally crushed." She nodded, admiring her hands as she stopped trembling. Her head was way up in the stars and she felt a sense of relaxation she hadn't felt in almost 3 years. "This shit works magic."

Peter nodded. "Keep it for tonight, I just want you to feel better."

She hugged the teen. "I think I need to go see someone. You're right, I might actually have PTSD."

"I'm going to take you to a friend's, is that ok? He won't have any loud music playing or anything, but he wants me to look at a program he built. You can just lay down on the couch and have a drink and relax. I think you need it."

They'd been away from the facility for 6 hours at this point. James was probably starting to get a little antsy, but he wasn't talking to her, so maybe he didn't care. Cypra adjusted Bucky's glock strapped to her leg under her dress and double checked the credit card in her bra. She had a knife hidden on the back of her dress that was of easy access. She was stoned, sure, but she could still take someone out. "That sounds good." Cypra took the teen's bicep and let him lead her out to the limo.

The night flew by. She was drinking and smoking heavily to make it go away. She had to just make it all go away. Cypra remembered Peter's friend, and a computer. There was a hum of a car engine and jingling keys. Then she was fighting someone, a girl. Her hands were webbed together momentarily until Peter broke her loose and she was able to wash the blood off of her hands. Sirens approached. She was flying through the air clutching on to Peter. Vomiting. Peter's voice. An older woman's voice. It was cold, then she was under the covers, warm. She drifted off to blissful sleep.

Cypra's eyes snapped open. She was in her bra and panties, snuggled up against…she rolled over. Peter was passed out shirtless next to her. She sat up, realizing she hadn't remembered getting in bed with him. Then she saw an unopened condom on the nightstand. Hell no. She started screaming. Peter shot up next to her, bewildered. "Hey, hey! It's ok. You're in my apartment" He covered her mouth. She kicked away from him, then once she saw her clothes, credit card, and weapons on the ground she relaxed a little.

"Did we have sex?" She asked eyes widened, Peter was about to answer…

A woman opened the bedroom door. "Is everything ok in here?"

Cypra quickly grabbed the covers and shoved them against her chest. The woman laughed a little. "Peter told me you were Mr. Stark's daughter. I promise I won't tell anyone you're here. Peter and I had a discussion long ago that he was old enough to make his own decisions. I know you're a little older than him, but don't worry, I won't tell your dad and I won't press any charges." She put her hands up and smiled. "Honestly, I'm just glad he's with a girl. I was starting to wonder if maybe-"

"-Aunt May." Peter stopped her. "We need some privacy please."

"Ok, well pancakes will be waiting." She winked at him and closed the door.

Cypra felt sick to her stomach.

"No, we didn't have sex." Peter answered, he looked concerned. Cypra took a deep breath. "But you were talking in your sleep. Does your dad know about you and Bucky?"

Oh shit.

"No, Peter and please, please don't tell him. He isn't ready to know." She begged.

"I won't but…you know what he did to your dad's parents right?" The teen got out of bed and found a shirt in his drawers.

Cypra nodded, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I'm a terrible person, I know. Bucky and I got…close on that special operation. It was a 'my life in his hands and 'his life in mine' sort of thing for 8 months. I mean, we did everything together."

"Aunt May said these were for you when you woke up." Peter tossed her some clothes. Jeans, a longs sleeve shirt and a hat. Cypra admired the scarf and nice brown socks and boots. Aunt May had some style. "You're not a bad person, but aren't you worried that your relationship with your dad is going to be kind of strained after he finds out?"

"Strained?" Cypra snorted. "He'll cut me out of his life."

"I don't think your dad would do that, he loves you too much." Peter told her. "He's always talking about you." He sat beside her as she dressed. "Don't cry. I was just curious."

She stood up. "We got to get back to the facility, come on."

"Oh hey, you may not remember this, but look outside." Peter pointed to the window. Cypra looked out to see a cold morning with various cars parked across the street…cars…there was a nice black Tesla there too. Her eyes widened. She turned to Peter. "Yeah, you bought a car."

* * *

Bucky awoke. It was 6 am. He dressed, combed his messy hair and entered the kitchen, fighting a headache. The team was all there, except for 2 people.

"Neither of them are answering their phones." Steve read his mind. Bucky's heart plummeted. HYDRA?

"Should we be concerned? They are old enough to take care of themselves." Vision asked.

Steve put a hand on his friend's shoulder and looked him in the eye. "Apple says Queens. They're still in New York."

"No." Bucky began. "Their phones are in New York. _They_ could be anywhere."

"Barnes, let's not panic here." Natasha said calmly. "How well trained is Cypra in the event of a faction?"

Again. How did she figure these things out so quickly?

"Faction?" Tony asked.

"She's kind of wanted by HYDRA." Bucky confessed reluctantly. He was cornered. "They'd do anything for her head on a platter."

"OK." Tony stood, sounding more on edge by the second. "What the hell were you guys doing on that op?" It got so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

"You'll have to ask the president for permission, I'm not at liberty to tell you or your daughter could be in some serious legal trouble." Bucky looked him dead in his eyes. "She's already having to defend herself to the Armed Forces, I'm not going to make this harder on her."

Tony's eyes were a mix of fear and rage. "Barnes, if she gets hurt or killed-"

"-I'm a dead man. Got it." Bucky finished. He tried her cell, it rang three times and then a groggy voice answered.

"Hey. We're fine. We're getting coffee and we'll be on our way back."

"Why the hell don't you answer your phone?" Bucky asked her. A wave of relief swept over the room.

"Look, it's been a rough night, I can't totally remember all what happened." She coughed a little, she sounded kind of sick.

"What do you mean?" Bucky's voice got low.

"I started having a panic or something at Peter's school dance so he gave me some cannabis oil, aaaand… it was downhill from there." She sighed.

"Cypra-" He started.

"I know, you can kill me later, ok? Just let me get through the morning. I know you're mad at me about-"

"I wasn't mad at you; I was worried about you. That's all. Just like I'm worried about you now." He told her.

"Well, I'm a big girl. I was trained by HYDRA's most elite, so I think I've got this." Bucky knew she was smiling by her tone of voice.

"Ok, but your dad doesn't know that." He cracked a smile. "And he's sitting here worried about HYDRA coming after you, just like I am."

"How'd that get out?!" She yelled. You could hear she was upset from in the kitchen.

"It slipped. I'm sorry." Bucky looked at Natasha with an irritated expression.

"Goddamn it, Barnes!"

"They don't know details. Relax." He assured her. "Just get home safe."

"I will. I love you."

Bucky froze. This is the first time she'd said it. "You too."

She hung up.

"Well?" Tony asked.

"Long story short, she partied a little too hard. She's fine, she'll be back. They both will." Bucky summed up.

Tony shook his head in disappointment, but he was generally unsurprised. "Guess the apple really _doesn't_ fall far from the tree."

Bucky ate his food and promptly left the room. It broke is heart a little to think that Cypra thought he was mad at him. He was just worried, and he had to admit, a little jealous. He smiled as he stepped into the shower. Well, he was just going to have to make it up to her before Steve took her away for the night.

* * *

 **Let me know how you liked it! Sorry for the wait, life has been throwing me non stop curveballs it seems.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sup guys? I hope you all had a good thanksgiving and are enjoying getting close to the holidays. I'm currently in Colorado.**

 **I already have plans for my next fic, but I need to know what you would like to see, I will be releasing the ideas at the end of this story, I like to get to know my audience. Also follow me on Tumblr: l0ve1sdead dot tumblr dot com if you want to, I'm not a huge stucky fan, but I posted this one gif that someone had photoshopped that I thought was cool and it blew up I was like lol tf. Ok then. If you don't already know, Tumblr has been taken off the Apple app store for inappropriate content involving children. Nothing more will be said.**

 **I have switched to omniscient subjective (yes I just made that up) narrator because the reason my chapters are so long is that I'm trying to get everyone's thoughts shoved in…it's even more exhausting than subjective! So Ugh! I hate narrating, but this was never meant to be a first person fic. What's going to happen is that it will still be mostly subjective, but other character's thoughts will be thrown in at any given time if absolutely necessary. We are switching gears again, prepare for a rollercoaster.**

 **Iconic vine of the day: **Black lady slamming baking sheets together (fifth harmony is synched in the background) ** "I didn't get no sleep cuz of y'all! Y'all not gon' get no sleep cuz of me!" (One of my favorites ;)**

* * *

Cypra sat in horror as the night was being played back to her via video as she was driving. She had bought a car, beat the crap out of this girl who gave her a nasty look for being drunk, and then had the cops called on her. Peter had called a friend to drop the Tesla off across the street, but that guy could've stolen it and Cypra would've been too drunk to know.

"You should've called my dad and had me picked up." She concluded, her coffee was hot, but not as hot as her face was from embarrassment.

"Yeah and then he'd never let us out together again." Peter sat in the passenger seat of the Tesla.

"How much money did I end up spending on this thing?" The young woman wasn't sure if she was ready to hear the answer.

"60k."

"All on the card?"

"Yep."

"At least I don't owe anything monthly." She sighed. "My dad's going to kill me."

"He said not to max it; you didn't." Peter drank his coffee eagerly, it looked like he was trying to stay awake. Cypra looked over at him briefly, concerned.

"Did you get any sleep last night?" She blinked and turned her eyes to the road ahead. This hangover was miserable, she felt like she had the flu.

"A few hours." He confessed. "I was trying to keep an eye on you because you were black out drunk and higher than a kite by the end of the night, I didn't want you to choke on your own vomit and die or get alcohol poisoning."

Cypra shook her head, disgusted with herself and her behavior. "Thank you, Peter. Really I can't thank you enough, but as soon I start slurring, please take the alcohol away from me. The real danger comes if I happen to get into a drunken rage. I've killed people with what I can do."

Peter was quiet. "You were just so…high strung all night, I wanted you to have fun, and you did…but it's not worth your own life or someone else's."

She nodded. "I didn't mean to ruin your homecoming, I kind of made it all about me, and I'm sorry."

"No way!" Peter protested, sitting up. "That was the most fun I've ever had out with someone, I got to watch you kick that girl's ass, that was awesome! You've got some intense combat training."

Cypra heaved in a breath. _Thank you, Winter Soldier._

Peter couldn't' stave off the exhaustion any longer, he fell fast asleep as Cypra completed the two-hour drive back to the facility.

Her dad stood, arms crossed, with Steve and Bucky beside him as she pulled up to facility. She knew she was going to get a talking to from all three of them.

Cypra sighed, and shook Peter gently. The teen arose with a yawn a few blinks. "We're here."

Spiderman shifted and stretched uncomfortably in his seat. "You ready to get bitched at?"

"About as ready as I'll ever be." Cypra huffed. They opened their doors simultaneously.

"Nice car." Tony quipped, clearly irritated as she exited the Tesla. "2018 Model S?"

Cypra nodded, pulled the credit card out of her pocket and handed it to him. She felt like 15 years old again. "I didn't max it."

"How much was that thing?" He inquired further.

"Sixty grand." She pushed some brown hair out of her face. "It runs at 77 but I guess I talked them down."

Steve and Bucky both looked like they had seen a ghost.

Tony nodded, looking a little more relieved. "You were due for a new car anyways."

Cypra tossed him the keys. "It's under your name, not mine. I don't have good credit."

"You don't have _any_ credit, sweetheart." Tony corrected, he approached his daughter and wrapped her in a hug. "Look, I'm just glad you're ok. We were all worried about you." As he released her, something caught Cypra's eye, it looked like scratch marks on his wrists.

" _You_ were worried about me? _I_ was worried about _myself_." She ran a hand through her hair, pretending she wasn't looking. "I woke up half naked in bed next to Peter, and I just thought to myself, that's it, I'm going to jail." She shrugged as she relayed her thoughts. She shook her head "I never want to be that drunk again." She went to the trunk to gather her things.

"Woah, chill." Peter stepped away from Bucky who looked like he was going to kill someone. "I didn't sleep with her. I just stripped her down because this girl at an after party we went to puked on her. I stayed up all night with Cypra making sure she was still breathing."

"Peter took great care of me." She nodded matter-of-factly and smiled sweetly at the teen. "He even knew to put me in the recovery position."

"Peter, you've unlocked new features on your suit effective immediately." Tony stated.

"W-wow, Mr. Stark. Thank you so much." The teen beamed with excitement.

"I'll see you inside." He nodded Peter off to the door.

Peter grabbed his things and rushed inside, clearly understanding that the adults needed some time alone.

"Cypra if you're going to go out, you need to have one of us with you at all times." Steve broke to her. "I didn't understand how dangerous HYDRA really was until SHIELD fell." Steve took a step towards her. "Natasha did some digging, and your bounty is over a hundred million dollars."

That was a big number. Cypra caught Bucky's eyes, he looked concerned, and guilty.

"I shouldn't have dragged you into that mess, I'm sorry." The ex-assassin apologized.

"Why are you sorry?" She spoke to him. "SHIELD did this to me, not you."

"No, SHIELD sent you after _me_ , not all of HYDRA." He argued.

"Bucky, we took down 9 HYDRA sleeper cells in 2 weeks, _and_ their headquarters in Berlin in a couple of months. _We_ did that. Together." She countered. "I wanted to; I wanted them to pay for what they had done to you."

Tony clenched his jaw, Cypra knew he wanted to say something and she was impressed with his self-control. Steve looked sober, and he met Cypra's eyes with understanding and a hint of gratefulness.

Bucky sighed and looked back at the facility briefly. "Please, Cypra, I know I taught you a lot, but I'm just worried that…" He stopped. His blue green eyes inevitably filled with tears.

Tony looked at him rather startled. It appeared he was starting to get a grip on how Bucky truly felt towards his daughter, he looked…empathetic, for once. It was like he knew exactly what Bucky was feeling.

"I'm worried that I can't protect you." His tears fell. "There's only a few of us and thousands of them, not to mention super soldiers that are as strong as Steve."

 _The icy rain fell on Cypra's hood. Bucky quickly covered her with an umbrella. It took her off guard. He had been cold to her since they had gotten to the safe house in Berlin. He didn't trust her and she didn't blame him. "Are you cold?" The assassin asked her, his tired eyes meeting hers. He hadn't slept in what seemed like days._

" _A little, but I'm alright." She confessed._

 _Bucky put an arm around her and pulled her close to him. "I can't have you getting sick on me. I'll keep you as warm as I can." His voice was still a shell, emotionless, matter-of-fact and nothing more. Cypra felt tiny butterflies in her stomach as heat radiated off of his body. Despite not showering for a couple of days, he smelled good. Masculine. She leaned into him and let him guide her down the street to the coffee shop._

 _Halfway across the crosswalk, Bucky stopped suddenly. Before Cypra could even react he whipped out his gun and shots echoed around them as pedestrians fled. Bucky pushed her out of the way, letting the bullets hit his arm and ricochet off. He then pulled her towards him. "Stay behind me." He commanded._

 _The young woman pulled her piece, shot one; man down. Shot two; man down. Shot three; another man down._

" _Your aim is incredible." He took down the last two and turned to face her. "Where did you learn that?"_

" _SHIELD."_

 _Bucky looked familiar with the name, "We need to work on your timing, and how to identify hostiles before everyone starts shooting. I'll teach you."_

 _She wrapped her arms around the assassin. He froze, and she didn't even care. "Thank you for saving my life just now."_

"I understand." She nodded. She walked up to the ex-assassin and wiped the tears from his face with her thumbs. Kissing him gently on the cheek she smiled. "You don't need to blame yourself, ok? I promise I'll start taking precautions."

Tony made eye contact with Steve, the soldier met his eyes with a strange expression. Confusion maybe?

* * *

Tony was torn to shreds. Steve was taking his daughter out tonight? So what? He was a good guy, well mannered, and he knew he would protect her with his life. It was just an exchange for a favor Steve had done for her, it didn't mean anything. Right?

The truth was, it did mean something to Tony, it meant a lot.

'Hey," a familiar voice and firm hand clasped his shoulder. "What's on your mind?" Steve appeared to his left as he overlooked the forest by the facility from the same balcony Steve and Bucky had been on.

"You." Tony relinquished.

Steve clasped his hands together over the railing and met the billionaire's eyes in curiosity. God those eyes, they were a stunning, almost mesmerizing blue. Tony could just stare into them for hours if Steve would let him.

"Where are you taking Cypra tonight?"

"A place called Porsena." Steve looked out at the forest. The afternoon air swirled around the two men.

"Don't like my cooking?" Tony joked.

"I love your cooking." Steve countered seriously. "It's the one of the things I missed the most while in Wakanda with Bucky."

"I think I missed you leaving coffee grounds all over my counters." Tony cracked again, this time, earning a light laugh from Steve. They were quiet for a moment. Tony knew he had to tell him now. He wasn't going to get another chance like this. "Actually I missed everything about you." He chuckled bitterly. "I missed you, but I simultaneously hated you so much."

This was the second time Tony had admitted his feelings of hatred for the man. Steve felt a pain in his chest. Tony had hated him during his childhood, and he hated him now, even as adults. "I can understand why you would. Bucky used to call me 'the politest little prick he'd ever met' back when we were teenagers."

That was scary accurate to Tony.

"I missed you too, Tony." Steve turned to him. "I missed you a lot. I missed your wit and humor, I missed your intelligence when I couldn't figure out how to close tabs on Google Chrome-"

Tony actually laughed little at that one. Oh Steve, classic old man Steve. "It's more than that, Tony began. "I missed more than just your qualities, I missed who you are. I short circuited that night and it followed me around forever."

Steve nodded like he understood. A fire lit in the billionaire's eyes. Steve was stuck between a rock and hard place trying to decipher what was going on in Tony's mind, but before he could think with his head; they were kissing.

Tony felt a rush of guilt hit him as he tangled his fingers in the soldier's hair but soon the lust and the desire took over. He had this perfect man in his mouth and he held on to every second he could.

Steve had a hand on Tony's chest, and he allowed himself a few more tugs of the genius' lips before pushing away. The super soldier's face was on fire; his crotch was on fire; his brain was firing neurons at the speed of light. He was beginning to sweat, and a wave of nausea flooded over him as he realized what had just happened. "Tony we can't-"

"-I know." Tony ran his hands through his hair. "I just can't stay away from you. You're everywhere, my thoughts, my dreams, hell, even my nightmares, Rogers." He was beginning to sound angry.

"I think you need help." Steve told him.

"And then you sit there and pretend like you didn't just pull me closer to you." Tony blurted bitterly.

Steve put his hands on his head and turned a circle in frustration, Tony was right. He had feelings for him, he couldn't deny that, but then Cypra.

 _Steve was dizzy as her green gold eyes gazed into his with certainty. She was always so certain. Her body pressed against his, her hair billowing in the wind as he spun her round and around again._

"Look, this just isn't going to work Tony. I need to get ready to take your daughter out." He said. "We'll talk about this later." He left the balcony.

That was final then. Tony stood in his bathroom after a few minutes outside tears streaming down his face, eyeing the bottle of pills by the sink.

* * *

Bucky sat on Cypra's bed, smiling as she stepped out of the shower, wrapped in a towel.

"What are you doing in here you creep?" She threw her bra at him, half laughing.

"What? I can't see the woman I love for a bit before prince charming takes her away?" He approached her softly and kissed her, gently pulling at the towel until it fell to her feet. Running his hands down her back to her hips, he admired her body, feeling a feverish tingle rush through his veins. He felt a smile tug at his mouth as she sighed quietly to his kisses. He made his way from her mouth, down her breasts, to her stomach until he gently touched his tongue to her clit.

"James." She protested as she shuddered slightly with pleasure. "I have to get ready for dinner." She stepped away from him, but he stood and gently pushed her onto the bed.

"I'll be quick." He pushed her on her back and spread her legs allowing himself access to her moist genitalia. Bucky took all of her in his mouth, listening to a quiet moan escape from her lips as she spread her legs for him even further. Grabbing his long hair, she slowly pushed her hips upward trying to feel as much of him as possible. He listened to her noises become more desperate as he flicked her clitoris gently with his tongue. Soon she rolled her head to the side, gripping his hair tighter as she came into his mouth. Bucky hummed as he tasted her sweet finish, and lifted his head to meet her eyes. Cypra was in and out of coherence so he took the opportunity to pull his pants off and crawl up her body giving her a kiss on the neck to wake her up. "Hi beautiful."

"I want you inside." She begged sitting up. Her face was flush, and she had a look on her face that Bucky didn't recognize, it looked like worry, her eyes started to fill with tears. "Please."

"Cypra?" Bucky furrowed his eyebrows as he examined her eyes. "Hey." He was starting to lose his erection. Why was she crying? Why the sudden need for him?

She pulled him to her lips and forced his member against her wetness.

"Ok, ok," He gave into her between kisses. Slipping into her, he watched her worried expression switch to something more intense…lust. She was never lustful, passionate, yes, but never lustful…something was wrong.

He made love to her with a gentle strength, watching her drown in pleasure. "Fuck, James." She tilted her head back. "More."

"I don't want to hurt you." Bucky was already going as fast and as hard as he was comfortable with.

"More." She begged. "Please." She was almost breathless. Bucky couldn't do it any longer, he stopped and met her eyes.

"Why did you stop?" She asked him, almost angrily.

"Because you're scaring me." He told her. He pulled out, much to Cypra's dislike. He studied her for a moment. "First you don't want me, and then you're crying, and then you want me to do something that could possibly hurt you."

Cypra sat up some, she looked…bothered and really uncomfortable. She covered herself with a blanket, pushing her wet hair away from her face.

As Bucky's mind raced around, he saw something on her nightstand, it was a small package of…rice cakes? The color drained from his face. "Cypra, are you pregnant?"

She shook her head. "No. Why would I be pregnant?"

He pointed to the rice cakes. "You did this last time, the sex, the diet change, don't you remember?"

Cypra looked deep in thought for a moment. "I'm just nervous about dinner with Steve."

Bucky knew there was more to it, she looked… scared. "Are you sure you don't want me to tag along? Steve doesn't even have to know I'm there."

"I'll be fine." She got out of bed and began dressing.

"Cypra-"

She pointed to the door, "Let me get ready please."

Bucky kissed her head and left the room. Something was seriously, seriously, wrong.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hi everyone, I know what you're all thinking, "wtf happened to chapters 10-14?" I missed a** _ **critical**_ **detail in my skeleton and now I have to rewrite 20,000+ words because chapter 15 would not make any sense at all :/ So the reviews no longer make any sense now also, I apologize. I have revised the plot also to reorganize some things that would conflict with chapter 15 as well. Some things I have kept the same, but a lot has also changed. It should be smoother sailing this time around.**

 **Words of advice: Follow your skeleton and read it** _ **very**_ **thoroughly. If you have questions, PM me.**

* * *

Cypra sat quietly on her bed after she had dressed, " _Don't touch_." Natasha had warned her. " _Don't make extended eye contact."_

Why was Natasha so concerned about these things? Cypra knew she shouldn't overreact about it, this was something to be enjoyed, not worried about. She considered getting up and telling Steve she didn't feel well, it wasn't a lie, but she didn't want to be rude either. How many people were asked to go out with Captain America? Nobody.

She felt bad for kicking Bucky out of the room, actually, she didn't. Maybe she did? She stood, this indecisiveness was going to kill her. She felt nauseous as she rose, her nerves or…? She put a hand on her stomach, heart racing at the thought of possibly carrying new life. She hadn't even thought about it. It was early, but the brain fog and queasiness had slowly started about a week ago. If she was pregnant though, this would be the second time in 3 years her birth control had failed. Nobody could possibly be _that_ unlucky.

She didn't like dresses, she hated them. She wore a nice top and a skirt instead.

Someone knocked, "Come in." Her voice was shaky, result of the queasiness.

Thor entered, Cypra noticed how he filled the whole doorway as he did. "Do you have a moment?"

She nodded.

"You look ill." Thor told her.

"I'll be ok."

"I'm needed with my people." He told her. "I shouldn't be gone for more than a few days."

She nodded a second time, "Thanks for telling me."

Thor noticed the hand on her stomach, "Are you…"

"I don't know." She said softly refusing eye contact, she had forgotten her hand was there. "Possibly."

The God of Thunder was quiet, "I can take you back to the healers if need be."

The woman nodded a third time, "I'll let you know."

Thor embraced her shortly.

"Be careful." She told him.

"I will." He assured, squeezing her shoulder gently before leaving the room.

There was never too much to be said between her and Thor, they were at the relational level of being able to tell whole stories with one look. They often did in battle. She knew nobody would really understand it, and Bucky would be especially jealous if she tried to explain it, even it was a very platonic relationship.

She made her way out of her room, down the hall, and towards the elevator that would take her to the parking garage. Her legs were heavy, like lead, it was like moving through water. Hitting the 'P' button she leaned against the railing, trying not to vomit as the elevator took her down.

Cold air hit her square in the face and made her gasp a little as the door opened. Steve was there, leaning against a black stingray. She met his eyes and darted them back to the ground as she exited the elevator. "Captain." She greeted.

"You can call me Steve." He smirked. He was clad in dress pants and a nice blue shirt, matching his eyes, with a black tie.

"You're a superior officer." She countered.

"But I'm not _your_ superior officer." He argued. "Plus, we're in different branches."

Cypra couldn't look at him, her autism was starting to take over, the Asperger's part. Social cues were now unfamiliar, eye contact was impossible, and she wanted to crawl in a hole somewhere and play Mario Kart on a Nintendo DS. How? How did she make it to First Lieutenant in the Air Force? "Ok." She settled.

"Something wrong?"

Cypra forced herself to look at him and smile. "No, just shocked that you own a Corvette."

"It's Natasha's." He admitted. "I don't have a car."

 _That_ made more sense. She nodded. "You smell good." She blurted, and then covered her mouth briefly in horror. Why, why, why did she just say that? Her Asperger's was going to ruin this whole entire night.

Steve raised an eyebrow, smiling shyly at the compliment. "Well, you look _and_ smell good." He opened the passenger door, "ready?"

 _Hell no._

She smiled and got into the passenger seat, letting him close the door gently after her. If she just kept her mouth shut the whole night, there was no way she could say something else she'd regret.

He got in beside her, starting the engine, which roared with power. Closing the door, he buckled himself in and adjusted the rearview mirror. Cypra buckled her seatbelt also, but secretly hoped they'd get in a wreck bad enough for her to be killed but him to be spared so she didn't have to be this unsettled ever again. She then thought back to Bucky and decided that was a really selfish want, especially if she was growing a little one.

Cypra noticed his shield in the back seat, she turned to him, watching his focused eyes as he made his way out of the parking garage and into the light. She admired his hands, firmly gripping the steering wheel, she wanted to touch them again, and feel their warmth. _'Don't touch.'_

After 5 long minutes, she asked, "Are you ok?" Steve wasn't quiet for more than 3 minutes at a time she noticed, unless he was doing something. Did she make him uncomfortable with that comment?

He smiled that perfect smile at her, but there was a hint of uncertainty in those blue eyes of his. "It's been a while since I've taken anyone out."

"I've never even been on an actual date before." She shrugged.

Steve looked surprised at first but then amused. "Did your dad scare them all off?"

Cypra nodded, "For lack of a better explanation, yes."

She thought back to when she was younger, how fixated she was on who he was. She didn't really have interest in boys because of her intense schooling, extracurriculars, and because of, well, him.

" _Ms. Cypra, you're up next." The teacher announced._

 _Cypra hopped out of her chair excitedly, grabbed her poster and ran up to the front of the class. She must have been seven at the time. The project theme was important people in history, amongst the Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King, and Clara Barton posters she stood hers up on the table. "My project is about Steven Grant Rogers, Captain America, the world's first chemically enhanced super soldier, he was a hero in World War Two."_

 _The class 'oohed' and 'ahhed' as they saw the poster, I had lights, footage, and Tony had somehow managed to find one of Steve's pins from the war. He'd bought it for almost a hundred thousand dollars, just for Cypra's class project. She rambled on about him for 15 minutes, and then passed out cookies decorated like Steve's shield. She beamed as she brought home the poster with a bright red A++ to Tony, who kissed her and turned on a Captain America documentary on the history channel. Cypra, at seven years of age, watched all three hours of it._

Now, she was here, twenty-three years of age, and the man out of time himself, was taking her out to dinner. If she could go back in time and tell her seven-year-old self that, she would have flipped out. She studied him, it was no wonder women looked like they were going to faint at the sight of him. Cypra herself was hit with a dizzy spell so she redirected her attention to the trees outside. "What was World War Two like?" She inquired, suddenly, she was fascinated by the whole thing, each battle, how the Axis and Allies fought for power.

Steve told her, for an hour and a half he shared his experiences. He told her of death, pain, and suffering, but equally explained the light, beauty, and victory he saw also. He talked about Peggy, her short hair and intimidating demeanor, he talked about falling in love with her and how he didn't even understand what it was at first. He spoke about Bucky, how the war had hardened him, but how their friendship managed to persevere. It was interesting to hear about a different Bucky, the original Bucky. He sounded like kind of a jerk, and a womanizer, but some things were still the same. Cypra saw tears in his eyes as he recalled the day he lost his friend. It was clear that he still felt a lot of guilt surrounding the tragedy, and Cypra was careful not to ask any questions about it, she sat quietly and just listened.

At last they pulled into the parking lot, Steve was not interested in looking for spaces to park, since they were already 10 minutes late for their reservation. He pulled up to valet, "We're late."

The pair exited the vehicle and Steve handed the man at the podium the keys with a bill attached to it.

Instinctively, Cypra grabbed his bicep and let him lead her inside. _'Don't touch'_ She pushed the voice away, it wasn't personal, she just didn't want to get lost. The second level where Steve and Cypra were, was much quieter and only a few guests were seated up there. Cypra counted the exits, the number of waiters and waitresses, the number of people downstairs, over 70. Damn near a fire hazard. It was force of habit, she did this wherever she went. She noticed Steve looking at her as they sat down. She met his eyes with curiosity.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

"Just counting our ways out." She told him.

Steve smiled sweetly at her. "Do you trust me?"

That question caught her off guard. She supposed she trusted him, after all, he hadn't given her a reason not to.

"Yeah, why?"

"Can you trust that I'm going to protect you at all costs?" He met her eyes with a gentle assurance, Cypra felt her whole body relax at the sight of him. ' _Eye contact'_ Natasha's voice echoed in her head. Cypra broke her gaze and shifted it to an empty salad plate in front of her.

"I can take care of myself."

"Never said you couldn't." Steve countered. "But it's my duty as Bucky's friend, Tony's friend, and _your_ date, to do so."

She thought about what her dad might do to Steve if he let something happen to her. It wouldn't be pretty, she smiled at the thought of him yelling at Steve for some reason. She took a deep breath, "Okay."

Steve smirked and thanked the waiter as they got their menus. He ordered 2 glasses of wine but Cypra corrected one to water, she needed to be totally sober out here.

The whole thing was in Italian, which was fine because she spoke that, but she couldn't decide what she wanted because the options were endless. She finally decided on cheese and mushroom ravioli. Cypra regained her composure and put her menu down. Steve was frowning at his.

"Do you need help translating it?" Cypra inquired.

Steve looked up. "You speak Italian?"

"I speak, English, Spanish, German, Italian, Romanian, Russian, Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, and I'm sure I'm missing a couple…" She thought for a moment. "They'll come to me."

Steve's eyes widened a little. She translated about 30 dishes for Steve before he finally settled on a Carbonara dish.

As they were waiting for the waiter to return, Cypra became fidgety. She didn't want to meet his eyes, but she didn't want to be rude and ignore him. So, she studied the faces of all of the waiters and waitresses and committed them to memory. What if one of them tried to kill her? What if they were all HYDRA, waiting for her to be here, waiting for this very night when Bucky wasn't around to protect her? She felt the gun tucked in between her skirt and thigh. She was dangerously underprepared. What if this was all part of some big plan to take her out for good? Her and Bucky were their worst nightmare after all, but individually they weren't as effective. She should have just let him come. What if-

"Cypra."

She whipped her head back around at the sound of her name.

"What are you scared of?" Steve's gentle eyes rested on hers.

"I'm not scared of anything." She told him. Fear was uncommon for her, things made her uncomfortable, edgy, but rarely scared.

Steve thought for a moment, "Let me rephrase that then, what is making you anxious?"

"I'm not used to being out in public like this." She admitted. "I'm usually on base or holed up somewhere." She lied, well, only partially. Before she was sent after Bucky, she did spend most of her time on an Air Force base or hidden away somewhere. How was she supposed to explain her job? She couldn't.

Steve nodded like he understood. "Crowds make you nervous. I get that, but I'm right here. If you're worried about HYDRA-"

"-You're not even supposed to know about that." She cut him off. "Natasha needs to keep her mouth shut or she's going to get herself killed."

Steve was quiet.

"You guys don't understand." She shook her head. "You really have no clue."

What was so dangerous about her? Was it what she could do? The fact that she couldn't control it? Steve couldn't wrap his head around it, HYDRA had collapsed, and even if there were factions out there, they couldn't be very big. There must be something he was missing.

Steve decided to start conversation, he needed to take her mind off of what was bothering her. The waiter returned with their drinks, giving Steve the perfect amount of time to think about what he was going to ask her after they ordered their food.

"What was Tony like when you were little?" He started.

To Steve's delight, a smile crept across her face. "I don't know where to begin really. He was a good dad, he was troubled a lot, but he always made sure I was taken care of."

Steve thought for a moment, "Troubled how?"

"He was struggling with an addiction when I was 13, a different addiction than the painkillers I was talking about, I had just met Pepper, she took custody of me for two years and straightened me out. I was a bad kid." She laughed a little. "Being separated ended straightening us _both_ out. But before all that, he was hung up about his parents a lot."

Steve felt a pang of guilt. Cypra felt it too. They were both quiet.

"You said you were debriefed; did you ever approach Bucky about it?" The soldier began. He was going to siphon as much information as possible about their relationship. He couldn't figure them out at all. They didn't talk to each other during the day, but whenever they did it was raw and emotional. Bucky was not one to cry, but he was crying this morning.

Cypra nodded, "I try to keep my emotions out of my line of work, Rogers. What's done is done." She knew what he was trying to do, and she was going to shut him out. He was going to have to do way better than that.

"And what exactly _is_ your line of work?"

"Military."

Steve sat up straighter, "They don't send the 'military' after ghost assassins from terrorist organizations." It was too late that he realized his tone was accusatory. This was dinner, not an interrogation.

Cypra smiled, he was curious, and perhaps even distrusting of her; that was ok. He should be. "Why did you bring me out here Steven?"

Steve tensed at the use of his full name, he'd asked one too many questions and now she was suspicious. Hoping he hadn't totally blown her trust he sighed. "Honestly, I just wanted to get to know you. Tony doesn't talk about you, and Bucky doesn't like to either. I'm interested in getting to know you on my own."

"What's so interesting about me?"

"You're close to the people I'm close to." He told her. "You're important to them, so you're important to me."

Cypra might have fallen for that, except for the fact that she knew there was another variable involved. Steve was wanting to get to know her quickly, instead of over time like usual. This was outside of his character. Steven Grant Rogers innately was a reserved, almost completely introverted individual. He gathered most of his information through observation. She could tell he was getting frustrated because with her, there was nothing to observe. She was emotionless most of the time thanks to, you guessed it, her autism. His next tactic of getting information was direct questioning, and just as she suspected, this wasn't a 'date' for fun, this was exactly that. Fishing for information. This is why she was so nervous about it.

"Your attempts to manipulate me into talking about James aren't going to work honey." She shook her head. "If he won't talk to you about it, I'm not at liberty to discuss it either."

"I'm seeing that." Steve replied irritably. _'Honey'_

"Looks like you're just going to have to enjoy a night out and leave the obtaining of covert information to Natasha, you're terrible at it."

"So I've been told." He took a sip of his wine. Steve was only 'playing spy' to distract himself from the feeling creeping up inside of him. The one that made his heart race and blood pressure spike. The one he was losing control over. He directed his attention to her face. She was eyeing one of the waitresses again, biting her bottom lip in thought. The last time Steve saw a woman that beautiful and alluring was in 1945. He didn't think natural beauty like that existed any more in a world full of plastic surgery and lip fillers. Nobody was _that_ pretty anymore. He was wrong. She turned to face him, she opened her mouth slightly, like she was going to say something, but instead, she thanked the waiter who placed food in front of her.

"Don't you have a girlfriend?" Cypra piped up. "What's her name?"

"I don't have a girlfriend, and if you're referring to Sharon-" Steve began.

"Sharon who?" Cypra inquired further.

"Sharon Carter, you might have met her. I assume SHIELD was involved with the operation?" He continued, "Nick being your uncle and all."

The color drained from her face. Steve was dead correct. "We're acquainted, yes." She admitted reluctantly. The battle of the Triskelion she'd read about it trying to catch up on the way over to the facility. They must have met there, because she wasn't supposed to tell Steve that Fury had assigned her to him. Shit, she'd missed a lot.

"Do you not like her?"

Cypra laughed, yeah right was she about to talk about how she knew Sharon. "What's your favorite color?"

Steve smirked, the rest of the date was then devoted to getting to know the basics, and they were both fine with that.

Cypra was freezing as they walked back out to the car. A cold front must have blown in. Before Steve opened the passenger door he said, "I'm sorry if I offended you by trying to pry. You are a piece to a huge puzzle and I'm just trying to see where you fit in."

That was the truth, Cypra could tell by the way his eyes became soft and looked away from hers. She knew he didn't mean any harm, but there were just some things best left unsaid. Why she was hiding from her childhood hero? She wanted to protect him, she saw the hurt he already endured in his life and she didn't want to cause more problems for him. She nodded. "I get it. I do." She looked up at him.

An interesting look crossed Steve's face, she'd never seen it before. Suddenly she was against his chest, wrapped firmly into his arms. Her first instinct was to want to shove him off of her, _'Don't touch'_ but she caught herself, relaxed and let him hug her. She rested her arms around him too and listened to the sound of his heart. She thought that she would have a rush of adrenaline, but no, it had the opposite effect. Everything slowed, she was warm, she could honestly fall asleep like this if she wanted. This was a losing battle, every time she thought she had it under control he did something like this. It was a brush of their shoulders, lingering eye contact, or standing a bit closer to each other than the average person would.

Cypra felt warm breath below her earlobe, and then even warmer lips plant a gentle kiss to her neck. Her heart jolted in her chest and she broke out in goosebumps as his beard brushed against her. The adrenaline surge she had been expecting finally took over as he met her eyes again, his eyes, his lips, he was so close. So close that he brushed his nose against hers. She wanted to kiss him. Wanted to. _Longed_ to. She gently pushed him back. She couldn't believe it, she _liked_ him.

"I'm sorry." He apologized quickly and shook his head like he was coming out of a fog or something. "I don't know what came over me." He opened the door for her.

She didn't either, but she was devastated. Sitting down she wondered how could she be in a relationship with someone and then suddenly fall face flat for his best friend? That only happened in the movies. She was disgusted with herself. Emotionally it made sense because she'd been invested in him for years through research, as a teenager she dreamed about him often, but logically, she'd barely known him for a month and a half. He didn't seem to care though, because by the look of it, he was into her too. She shook her head and placed a hand on her belly, quick to remove it before Steve got in next to her.

She had feelings for both of them.

What were the fucking odds?


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey everyone, so after a long while, I finally finished the skeleton and made all the correct edits and the story has been moved from 15 chapters to 21…yay? I may condense them also "so obviously you** _ **can't**_ **quote me on that" ;) I am now writing off of events and not words so the chapter word count will be sporadic, did you see the 41 second super bowl TV spot for Endgame? I about cried again :/**

 **Halsey's 'Without Me' has been stuck in my head for days after watching the Victoria's Secret fashion show and I'm losing it.**

Cypra's heart was still partially racing, she folded her arms over her lap, and looked out the window, trying not to cry. She couldn't go on like this, the responsible thing to do was be a big girl and figure it out. For her however, sorting through complex emotions wasn't exactly easy, and her lack of social skills and counseling growing up didn't teach her how. At least not in a healthy way. She always turned to alcohol, she knew she picked that up from Tony.

They started drinking together when Cypra was 13, they bonded that way. It was wrong, it was dysfunctional, but they found comfort in each other. Tony had introduced pot to Cypra when she was 12, the CBD helped with her anxiety and anger, but the THC always left her dizzy and inoperable. She remembered being stoned, zoning out on the old couch he moved down to his lab. He would always check in on her and bring her snacks whenever the cravings kicked in, but mostly she just slept, and he just worked. She had no control over her anger or what her anger triggered; as she got older she understood that her dad was just desperate, willing to do anything to keep her from blowing the house up again and endangering their lives in the process.

The sound of glass shattering brought her back to the present. She whipped her head around, the back window had shattered. Then she heard a crack in the air.

"Get down!" Steve yelled and shoved her head down with his right hand. He grabbed his shield from the back and held it over her.

"I can hold it." Cypra held the straps attached to it. "Its HYDRA, pull over I'll take care of them." She knew it, she fucking knew this was going to happen. She should've let James come, why was she so fucking stubborn?

"No, I'm not pulling over!" Steve protested. "I can lose them." There were 2 black SUVs, he knew he had to just keep them behind him.

"No you can't." She argued. A bullet went through the windshield. "Goddamn it Steve they're going to kill you!"

Steve gassed the Corvette, soon they were on the highway, flying well over 90 miles an hour. Cypra crawled on top of his lap, a dangerous idea and shielded the both of them while she returned fire.

Steve wasn't surprised at all that she had brought a gun, she was an expert marksman in training, so if anything, he was relieved. He looped his arm around her waist to secure her and gripped back onto the steering wheel not taking his eyes off the road even for a second. Cypra must have hit the driver because one of the vehicles spun out and flipped. A few seconds later automatic gunfire erupted and was ricocheting off of the shield. Cypra pressed her body against the soldiers and braced, trying to protect both of them as a whirl of bullets flew at them.

"Hold on tight." Steve warned her over the noise and nearly jerked the car to the right. Cypra felt the G's pull at her but she remained solid, finally meeting the driver of the car behind them in the eyes right before she put one in his skull. Steve flew off the highway and onto a dirt road, looking at the rearview mirror expecting them to still be following them.

"They're done, I got them." Cypra met his eyes briefly before tossing the shield in the backseat and turning around to see the road ahead, getting off of his lap she suddenly saw it. "Steve! Deer!"

He saw the buck and hit the brakes launching Cypra through the windshield despite his arm being around her. She flew over the animal and onto the dirt road quite a ways in front of them. Steve didn't even have time to cuss, he ripped his seatbelt off and took off by foot down the road as the scared animal darted into the woods beside them. Cypra lay, awake but clearly dazed, she sat up slowly and shook her hair out. Her face was cut and bleeding a little and her hands were scraped up, but she looked okay otherwise. Steve rushed to her calling her name and then falling on his knees and cupping her face with his hands inspecting the damage.

"I'm okay." She smiled softly. "You didn't see but I kind of rolled out of it." He could tell by the dirt on her shoulder that she was telling the truth.

Steve pulled a little shard of glass out of her cheek, "I'm so sorry." Wrapping her back into his arms, he helped her stand.

"Steve I'm fine."

"You went through the windshield you're not 'fine', you're getting checked out when we get back." He looked back over at the corvette, front and back windows gone, and he couldn't see the back of the car but he imagined it was littered with bullet holes. "We need to get this thing towed. I can't drive it like this. I need to call Natasha."

Cypra got her phone and the shield out of the back seat, she had 6 missed calls from her, Wanda and Bucky. Dialing Natasha, she handed Steve the phone and assessed the vehicle damage, it was in working condition, but the outside was trashed.

"Hey, its Steve, I've kind of got some bad news." He began. He was silent and met Cypra's eyes with a look of shock, the color was beginning to drain from his face, Cypra could see it even though it was getting dark. "What? Is he ok?"

"What?" Cypra asked, worry setting in at Steve's expression.

"Why?" Steve asked Natasha, but he already knew why. "Natasha…"

"What is happening?" Cypra prompted.

Steve put a finger up to silence her, which actually just irritated her, "Yes we're ok, we got attacked by we think a HYDRA faction, Cypra took care of them, but your car…it's in pretty bad shape." He was quiet for a minute. "She needs minor medical attention, I hit the brakes on a dirt road trying not to hit a deer and she flew through the windshield. No, she's up and moving around, just scraped up. I need you to come get us." He listened for a moment and then said "Ok, I'll see you." He hung up.

Cypra threw her arms up. "What the hell is going on?"

Steve approached her calmly. "You need to sit down."

Cypra sat against the hood. Close enough.

Tears were beginning to well in the soldier's eyes, "Your dad, he uh," Steve cleared his throat. "Col. Rhodes found him in the bathroom, he overdosed on something."

Cypra's eyes widened and her fight or flight instinct kicked in. "Is he alive?"

Steve nodded, "They're pumping his stomach, but he's non-responsive. There's no brain activity, he's on life support."

Cypra was silent, she felt a weight crashing down on top of her. He had gotten help for this, she had gone to counseling sessions _with_ him to address this issue, and he had gotten clean. Why was he relapsing all of a sudden? Was it her, was it because he couldn't handle her being back?

Steve sat beside her, not touching her, not saying anything. They both sat as the shock subsided and the grief began to settle in.

A half hour later an Acura pulled in, with a tow truck behind it. Natasha and Bucky parked on the side and emerged from the vehicle.

"Are you ok?." Is all Bucky asked when Cypra wouldn't make eye contact. Bucky gently moved her chin around, surveying her face. "Is this from the windshield?"

She nodded.

Bucky looked over at his friend. "Are _you_ ok?

"Yeah, I'm fine, but I'd probably be dead if it weren't for her quick thinking." Steve squeezed Cypra's shoulder.

Bucky smirked, "Yeah those guys don't stand a chance against her. Take it from me, I used to work for them."

"I know you're probably pissed at me because I told you that you couldn't come, and I'm sorry. I should've gotten my head out of my ass." Cypra stared off into space.

Bucky pulled her into him, Steve felt a pang of…was it jealousy? "I don't care I'm just glad you're alive."

Natasha wrapped her arms around Steve, "I'm sorry."

"For?" Steve began. "I just ruined your Corvette."

"Material things can be replaced." Natasha told him. "Your lives can't. You know that."

They loaded into the Acura and let the tow truck team do their thing, as they were driving down the road, avoiding the main highways Cypra spoke, "Why'd he do it? What happened?"

Natasha heaved in a breath and faced Cypra from the passenger seat. "We don't know, trust me, we're in as much shock right now as you. I always knew he took a few painkillers every now and then but in no way did he ever abuse them...at least not when he was with us."

Cypra nodded slightly, watching Steve's hands again as he drove. Steve had let Bucky sit in the back with her, the super soldier he knew he couldn't comfort her the way his friend could.

"It's me then." Cypra blurted, "That's the only major thing that's changed in his life that would trigger a relapse."

"Don't do that to yourself." Natasha told her softly. "I've never seen that man happier in my life. He loves having you here."

"I agree." Steve began. "I don't think it has anything to do with you."

He knew this was actually his fault. He should've never kissed Tony, but he was livid that Tony would take painkillers over it. At least, that's what he assumed happened. The guilt ate at him as he drove, he should've just kept his hands to himself, even from the beginning.

 _Steve couldn't believe what had just happened. He pushed Tony away in anger, "Why are you doing this?" He'd asked the genius, but they had both participated in the kiss._

" _Shut up, before you- know-who hears you." Tony snipped, he didn't have a nickname for Fury yet. Steve was irritated at the names Tony was calling everyone. He was Spangles, Clint was Legolas, Thor was Point Break, Bruce was Green Machine, and Natasha was just 'that red headed whore' Tony had never really gotten over being spied on by her._

 _The Helicarrier was god knows where over the ocean at this point. The team had been fighting for days, and just when Steve thought he couldn't take anymore, Tony pulled him into the lab and kissed him. Actually touched their lips together. Steve wanted to hurt him, oh how he wanted to hurt the billionaire but a few seconds later something broke inside of him and he relaxed into the kiss, feeling a sense of validation somewhere. He wasn't sure where._

 _That night, Tony had snuck into Steve's sleeping quarters, he couldn't sleep, but neither could Steve. They sat on the bed, backs against the wall, watching Forrest Gump, the first time Steve had ever seen that movie. Tony insisted that it would fill him in more. Halfway through the movie Tony paused it to pee, and when he came back out Steve asked him to clarify some things. Steve remembered talking, then kissing again, then it was escalating. They were touching each other…undressing. He woke up the next morning with the genius wrapped in his arms and a million questions from Natasha who had woken them both up for breakfast._

"Steve!" Natasha elbowed him, "Slow down, you're going to get us in a wreck, and this is Tony's car."

He snapped out of it, his mind had been elsewhere. He looked in the rearview to see Cypra fast asleep on Bucky's shoulder, it made sense she was exhausted. She'd been through a lot in only a few hours, besides, the likeliness of her getting any sleep when they got back, slim to none.

* * *

The on base hospital was quiet. The team was scattered around the waiting room. All eyes fell on Steve and Cypra as they entered.

"What the hell happened to you?" Clint blurted in disbelief when he saw her.

"Hail HYDRA." Cypra announced coldly, walking to the front desk to talk to the lady sitting behind it.

"Jesus." Sam muttered. "You ok man?" He looked at Steve.

"I'm fine, thanks to her." He sighed, sitting next to him. "Any word on Tony?"

Sam shook his head. "The doctor was waiting for-."

"Ms. Alise?" An unfamiliar voice broke through the quiet conversation.

Cypra spun around from the front desk. "Stark will be fine." She corrected. "I'm not in the field." She approached the Asian man in the white lab coat.

"Ms. Stark, I'm doctor Singh, I'm your dad's primary care provider. He has listed you as his power of attorney. If quality of life decisions need to be made, you will be contacted immediately but we are doing everything we can right now to keep him stable. I need you to sign this please."

"Quality of life?" Natasha questioned.

"It means if he doesn't recover, I'm the one who has to pull him off life support." Cypra signed her name at the bottom of the page. A grim silence hung in the air. The gravity of the situation wrapped around the Avengers like a blanket. They could lose Tony Stark. Not only would the team be in huge financial trouble, nobody else had the engineering skills to design the suits and equipment that made their missions possible. The world would lose a genius, inventor and groundbreaking scientist. And Cypra, she would lose her father. "What are you giving him?"

"Pentoxifylline and methylprednisolone." The doctor told her.

"What are those?" Peter inquired.

"One is to help blood flow to his liver, the other one is to help with the inflammation."

"What are his enzymes at?" Cypra asked.

The doctor sighed. "ALT 3560 and AST 2980."

"What's the normal range?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

"For ALT 0-45 and AST 0-35" The doctor explained.

"And he's at 2 and 3 thousand for both levels?" Natasha clarified in disbelief.

A nurse entered and called for the doctor, he nodded and told Cypra "I will call and keep you updated."

Cypra stood as panic began to rise in her chest. She had figured it out. "Unbelievable." She blinked and stared at the wall before turning around to face the team. "This wasn't a relapse."

"What? What do you mean?" Steve furrowed his eyebrows.

"His enzymes wouldn't be that high over taking an extra pill or two." She explained. "It wasn't a relapse Steve. This was a suicide attempt."

* * *

Nobody knew what to say to her. The team let her escape to her room, and nobody said a single word as they ate a late dinner. Steve wasn't hungry, he just sat amongst his team, flashing back the feel of Tony's lips on his, the feel of his hair and stubble against his skin. Why had he even gone so far that night on the helicarrier? What was he trying to prove? His dominance? The fact that he could be desirable despite Tony's comments about being 'old'? It was the perfect way to get back at the genius after all, let him insult you and then make him fall for you. Steve couldn't believe how truly immature he was all those years ago; but after losing Bucky at war and waking up without him*…

Now, 5 years later, another Stark came into the picture. Despite Steve's maturity, he was faced with the same dilemma. Nobody really knew her, yet she seemed to know everyone. She was quiet, secretive, but apparently there was a wild side to her. A side crafted by years of watching her dad fall captive to drugs, sex, and money. He knew she didn't want her pity, or anyone's pity, but he felt bad for her anyways. He wasn't exactly sure what he was attracted to, maybe it was the potential he saw in her. He saw the same in Tony.

Cypra sat on the bathroom ground, in her bra and panties in front of the toilet. She was nauseated again, not sure if she was going to throw up or just be miserable the rest of the night. She wanted to feel despair, she wanted to feel hopeless, but she was numb. Her body felt like it was burning, her mind was racing around a thousand thoughts. What a day it had been. She had woken up in Peter's apartment, spent all day doing paperwork for the Air Force, and then gone to dinner, got interrogated by Steve, then attacked by HYDRA and now her dad was in critical condition in the hospital. Oh and then there was _this,_ the possible second pregnancy by HYDRA's ex-elite weapon.

Someone knocked. She already knew who it was by the sound of their knuckles, "Come in." She said loudly from the bathroom floor.

Bucky entered the room in his nightshirt and sweatpants. He leaned against the bathroom door, studying his lover with worry behind those green eyes of his. "You getting sick?"

Cypra wouldn't meet his eyes. "I feel like I'm about to."

"Why are you avoiding eye contact with me?"

She couldn't look at him, she couldn't look into his eyes and see the love in them and know she was falling for another person. She loved Bucky fiercely, and with everything she had in her, but the guilt was eating her alive. You can't love two people. At least not in the same way at the same time and although she wasn't sure if she really 'loved' Steve, she was at least a little infatuated with him. That was enough for her to feel like she was cheating. She realized she hadn't answered Bucky yet. "I think we need to talk."

Bucky knew it. His heart sank the minute she said those words, he knew the minute he was making love to her and she wanted him to hurt her. She _wanted_ to hurt. Something wasn't right, and he knew that she knew it was them. Being with him was bothering her.

"Why are you leaving me?" He asked boldly. He was in no mood for games. "What did I do?"

Cypra was taken aback by the fact he thought he had done something, it never occurred to her that he would blame himself. "James…it's nothing you did, I just– I can't do this until I sort some of my emotions out."

"What emotions?"

"Confusing ones that don't make any sense. Then put my dad's condition on top of all that." Cypra stared at the floor.

' _So she's overwhelmed'_ Bucky thought. It made sense, Stark falling out was a huge shock to the whole facility. Cypra could only process so much at a time, and Bucky knew that when they were in Berlin, she gave him her whole self. Now he was only going to get a fraction, but he didn't care, he loved her. Part of her was better than none of her

"Can we try to work this out?" He surprised himself at how calm he was being despite having his heart ripped to shreds in a matter of minutes.

Cypra thought for a moment, why couldn't they work this out? What if she could just work through these sudden feelings for Steve and move on? Why couldn't she do that? She sighed, "I think we need a break, just let me figure this out first. I don't want to half ass our relationship."

Bucky felt relief crash into him. Just a break. He could do that, he took a 3 year 'break' from her. It made perfect sense that she needed space right now. Anyone would need space after something like this. Her dad was probably about to die, and she probably felt guilty for being with him at the moment. It didn't mean she didn't love him.

"You need space right now, I get it. Anyone would." He approached her and bent down, kissing her head. "Cypra…if you're pregnant-"

"-we'll figure it out." She assured him. "We won't have a choice."

Bucky was finally able to meet those beautiful eyes, "We will." He agreed, tucking some hair behind her ear. "If you need me, I'm here. If you don't, I'm still here." He put a hand on her head briefly before standing and making his way back out into the hallway.

Thirty minutes passed and having talked with Bucky, the nausea subsided, and she was able to get into bed as she was falling asleep, another knock presented itself at the door. Thinking it was Bucky again she drowsily told them to come in. It wasn't Bucky, it was Steve. Cypra nearly jumped out of her skin and covered herself with the sheet, but it was too late, he had already seen her. "Damn it Steve!"

"You said come in!" Steve had turned completely around, back facing her.

"I thought you were Wanda!" She lied. "Women don't typically care about seeing each other half naked, we're women!" She raised her voice, getting out of bed to put one of Tony's shirts on from her drawer, she sort of swam in it, but it covered all the necessary parts.

Steve could understand, the men were always walking around in their underwear, or not at all, in the locker room in the gym upstairs. Nobody cared, they were all guys.

"Ok I'm dressed." She sat back in bed and covered her bare legs with the sheet.

Steve turned back around, relieved at the sight of the Nirvana shirt she was wearing.

"What do you want?" She asked irritably. She hated being woken up.

"I was just coming to check on you, you've been up here for hours." Steve suddenly understood how stupid he was sounding. Of course she had been up there for hours, what did he expect from someone who just found out their parent attempted suicide? He approached her, closing the door behind him and sat on the bed beside her.

They sat in silence for a minute before he said. "Cypra, I am so sorry. If you need to talk, I'm here. I know I was sticking my nose in your business at dinner and I'm sorry for that too. I want you to know that I'm not going to do that anymore. If you want to tell me something of your own free will, then ok, but it was wrong of me to do what I did."

This was the second time he had apologized for that. It must have really been eating at him. Cypra scooted closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, laying her head on his broad shoulder. She didn't know how to tell him she forgave him for everything that happened today, she hoped he would understand. She felt a heavy arm wrap around her lower back and another one across her upper body. Her heart began to race as she took in the smell of his light cologne, his rhythmic breathing, and comforting embrace. She wondered if this happened to every woman he came into contact with. Did Natasha ever feel like this? Wanda? She closed her eyes as she felt his thumb stroke her upper back gently. He was hurting too, she could feel it. She needed to quit being selfish pretending like she was the only one being affected by this. These people were her dad's closest friends. They cared about him too.

After a few minutes, she let him go. "What do you think was going through his mind as he was losing consciousness?"

Steve's eyes filled with tears. What a question. "I'll bet he was thinking about how much he loves you."

Cypra felt the tears rush up and stream down her cheeks, "Then why would he take himself away from me?"

Steve pulled her back into his arms, now crying himself. "He doesn't know how to handle the hurt." And it was true, Tony was hurting. Steve had hurt him so bad that he wanted to take his own life to stop the pain. It seemed dramatic, all over a kiss, but there was so much more to it that Steve didn't even know where to begin to explain. He couldn't.

Cypra sobbed into his chest, clinging to him for dear life. The spiral had started, she was losing control. The lights flickered above, she hadn't felt anything just a half hour ago and now she was feeling everything.

Steve held her tighter praying she wasn't going to have some sort of meltdown where stuff started floating again. He didn't know what her rage looked like, and he didn't want to. A few minutes passed and Cypra had calmed down enough to stop crying and to stop the lights from flickering. She was…tired. Crying like that had exhausted her. She felt weak, sick, vulnerable, and somehow Steve's presence validated all she was feeling. His blue eyes, wet with tears just like hers. His mind, just as confused as hers was. His heart, just as broken. Wiping her face she took a breath and met the eyes of the soldier. Steve stroked her cheek once, it was all coming together now. He knew why he was falling, it wasn't the fact that she was a Stark, it wasn't her potential, it was this. Her ability to be vulnerable, and defenseless. To put her ego aside and let herself feel hurt. It was the hidden authenticity of this woman, who wore a mask, to take the mask off and hurt _with_ him. Natasha didn't ever display this type of emotion, the last person to cry with him like this was…Peggy.

He kissed her, and confidently at that. Cypra graciously accepted him and something struck her, she wasn't just going to 'get over' this. This was real. She _really_ liked him. Comfort spread and calmed her body, her soul even. He was familiar, and he was safe. Every brush of his tongue, every gentle pull of her lips, she felt more and more like she belonged here. It was unfamiliar to the way she felt with Bucky. Even though she loved the assassin, she felt like she was betraying everyone around her. Cypra broke it off as soon as she felt warmth spread to her genitalia, they'd been kissing too long.

Steve was a little relieved also that she pulled away, he was beginning to lose the battle of his body wanting to reproduce. It was an extremely inappropriate time to get an erection.

Cypra flopped back onto her pillow, covering her face with her hands. What was actually wrong with her? This was the definition of whore. She couldn't be going back and forth between Steve and Bucky, neither of them knowing what the hell was going on. She needed to make up her mind or give up on both of them all together. She decided to do the second option. It sucked, but it was just easier that way. "We can't be together."

Steve was not surprised, he more deserved this, after all, it was exactly what he had done to her father.

"I know." He said quietly. "I get it." Why did he think she would be into him anyways? Emotions had been running high and she was probably just looking for something, anything to get her mind off of the despair.

"Goodnight." She told him. That was his cue to leave. He hoped he hadn't overstepped the boundaries, but he squeezed her leg, bid her goodnight, and left the room knowing that he probably most certainly had.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello. It's been a while. I am quite busy preparing for my new baby boy who will be here in July. I'm also about to start a new job and my bf is going to be gone a lot in April. Will try to keep up.**

Cypra didn't sleep at all that night. In fact she wanted to get up, wake both Steve and Bucky up, sit them down and talk about what was happening. She wanted to do this, but she also wanted to feel Bucky inside of her, then suddenly she tossed that thought out and remembered Steve's lips against hers, against her skin. Thinking about it gave her chills and after a few moments she ditched the topic all together. She rolled to her other side for the 50th time in 2 hours, never able to get comfortable. She tried to keep the darkness out, tried to keep her dad out of her mind so she wouldn't have another panic attack, but he kept creeping in.

**Trigger Warning**

" _Daddy!" 11-year-old Cypra cried out in relief and wrapped her arms around his neck after she was untied. She was naked, covered in urine and feces, she hadn't eaten in two days, and she was hurting. Really, really, bad. Tony in his ironman suit could care less about her appearance, or her stench, he wrapped her in a military blanket and held her. He cried, it was the first time she had seen him cry. The FBI agents were ordering people around, they took pictures, Cypra was sure some of those were of her, and dug around in every box in that cold musty basement._

 _The second Tony helped her to her feet, she passed out. She woke up later in an ambulance, her dad holding her hand, an IV placed and oxygen mask covering her mouth and nose. She began to cry, "Dad, I couldn't do anything I was so scared."_

" _I know," Tears fell to his cheeks; he squeezed her hand. "I've got you now, princess."_

**End Trigger**

11-year-old Cypra was no longer a virgin, the man had stripped her of that. The man with the god-awful smell and yellow teeth. An ugly scar cascaded from his nose to his upper lip, like it had been torn somewhere. He didn't speak English, she didn't know even to this day what he spoke, she couldn't remember. She swore off boys for life after that, the thought of a penis disgusted her, and she remembered having an emotional breakdown in the bathroom after sex ed the year after. She shut herself off completely from socializing and turned to researching Steve.

Steve wasn't there, not physically, but his interviews and timeless smile counseled her through her grief. His voice soothed her to sleep at night and woke her up in the morning. He was her motivation to do great things, to be as great as he was. All the while, Cypra shut Tony out, she didn't want him to feel worse about it that he already did. She wasn't comfortable talking about those 2 days in the basement. She had somehow hurt her father by being raped, and she hated herself for it.

Tears stung in her eyes. She should have opened up to him. Instead she turned to Steve. Why did she turn to a dead man? Why did a dead man comfort her more than her own father? She would hear Steve in her dreams. _"The most important people in our lives are the ones that we don't always appreciate."_ She remembered hearing that, she remembered how his tone had changed in pitch at the end like it always did. Steve never really said that, but her mind was so good at putting pieces together that her subconscious had fabricated that message for her. She was nearing delusional when it came to him. Her fixation was starting to manifest into auditory hallucinations. Autism was an interesting illness. She thought perhaps she was developing schizophrenia. Many autistic kids did.

She felt the nausea spring up again, and she decided it was time for her to get over her anxiety and just take a pregnancy test. She had stolen one from the on base hospital and stashed it in her bathroom drawer. She peed and placed the HCG indicator on the countertop next to her, one red line was negative, two was positive. After two agonizing minutes passed, she checked the indicator:

It was negative.

She expected to feel some sense of relief, but she didn't. Instead, she felt a bone crushing sadness. She realized that she _wanted_ to be pregnant with his baby. She didn't even know why. Maybe it was to make up for the loss? To validate the fact that she could carry life again? Cypra sat on the floor again and cried. What the fuck was wrong with her? She needed to get over herself. She stashed the negative test somewhere safe, it was too risky to just throw it away.

Cypra felt the need to escape. She had to get out of here. She couldn't just wake up in the morning, go have breakfast and train with her dad's team like usual, she guessed she actually _could_ , but she couldn't handle Steve and Bucky being in the same room. It would rip her to shreds. Where to go? Where to go?

Cypra packed only necessary things in an athletic duffle. Details would always be sorted out later. Looking at the closest international available flights she found two, Singapore left in a couple of hours, there wouldn't be enough time. The next one was Beijing, still not enough time to catch. The third one left in three and a half hours which was precisely enough time for Cypra to purchase the ticket, get her passport checked, and board. It was to…

Berlin, Germany.

Cypra sighed, why did God always do this shit to her? She had been avoiding Germany since she made it back to Midgard. She wasn't sure she could handle going back there after what happened, but she couldn't stay in New York watching her father die in a hospital bed either.

She snuck out quietly, silently actually, out the facility doors, and into her Tesla. She sat in the driver's seat for a second, tears brimming in her eyes again. God promised that he'd never give her more than she could handle, but between the health of her father, the threat of HYDRA, the confusing need/want/not want relationship with Bucky, and the newly blossoming relationship between her and Steve, she was going to lose it. She was afraid she was going to lose herself again even though she knew who she was.

* * *

 _Bucky felt soft hands against his skin._

He awoke with a start. Nobody was in there. It was four o'clock in the morning. He felt like he needed to check on Cypra, but he didn't want to wake her up. She had been through enough that night. He thought about their possible new baby, and it scared him. While he was grateful for another chance at becoming a father, he was equally unsure about how he would fit into his new role. If Tony survived, he'd find out eventually, and Bucky didn't want to be the reason Cypra cut ties with her father. What if CPS came and took their baby away from them? The government knew who Cypra really was, after all, they employ her, what if they didn't see her fit to be a mother? What if she got thrown in jail for associating with him in a non-platonic way? He remembered her words after the first time they'd had sex. He had asked if she was okay.

" _I just committed treason. No, I am not okay."_

Bucky sat up. He should've just used a condom. He had been so lost in her touch, her smell, the way her body melted at his touch, the sounds she was making. He had never felt more wanted, and a condom was the last thing on his mind.

God he wanted her again, but he wasn't going to force himself on her. He'd never. Plus, what kind of person would he be trying to initiate sex after a tragic accident?

Bucky wasn't going to go back to sleep, so he decided to hit the gym instead.

He wasn't totally shocked to find Steve there, but he _was_ shocked to find that his friend had been crying. Steve didn't cry, but here he was, on one of the workout benches, about as upset as Bucky had ever seen him since losing his mom.

"Hey." Bucky greeted gently, trying not to startle him.

Steve looked up, eyes red, tears brimming. "Morning."

Bucky sat beside him. "I'm so sorry Steve."

Steve sniffed and nodded. "I am too. It's my fault."

Bucky looked over at him. "It's not your fault. You weren't even here."

Steve shook his head. "I shouldn't have done what I did."

The ex-assassin fell silent. He wasn't sure if he should ask. Again, he didn't want to pry. He was confused though, at what Steve could have possibly done. He didn't _make_ Tony take all those pills.

"Whatever you did, he still chose to do what he did. You didn't choose for him." Bucky told him.

Steve stood and stretched his back muscles, he didn't want to think about this anymore. "Spot me?"

* * *

It was quiet at breakfast, no music, no TV. Just the team eating what Bruce made them for breakfast. Nobody knew he was a good cook.

"Should we go check on her?" Clint asked.

"Yeah, I'm getting a weird feeling." Natasha tapped her nails against the table. "Barnes?"

He stood and left the room after her.

Natasha pulled a glass computer monitor down from the ceiling above the table. "I was doing some research last night. Something about that girl isn't right." She pulled up a large file on Cypra from the United States Air Force.

"What do you mean something isn't right?" Steve furrowed his eyebrows.

"Guys, her dad was just in an accident, come on." Bruce interjected.

"Yeah is this necessary?" Sam agreed, "When you do this it always ends in some crazy accusation."

"I'm not accusing her of anything." Natasha stated. "I just want everyone to take a look at this." She moved the monitor so everyone could see it.

She started sorting through the file. "It looks like Cypra got her degree in astrophysics and aerodynamics at a private college. She graduated at 16."

"No way!" Clint got closer to the screen. "16?!"

"Look who her father is, Clint." Sam spoke.

Natasha squinted a little. "Records show her IQ was measured in an MIT study. 190."

The room silenced. Bruce stood and took a look at the study. "When was this done?"

"2012."

"What does that mean?" Wanda asked.

Bruce looked a little disturbed. "She's logical-mathematical, and possibly spatial. To put that in perspective; my IQ is 154, Tony's is 160. Did they do this right?" He sifted through the document.

"So…she's a genius?" Steve asked.

"She's more than a genius, Steve. This is prodigy-level intelligence." Bruce read the document to himself. "This is incredible, and she was only 16 when they did this?"

Natasha nodded and motioned to him to swipe, "there's more."

Bruce flipped to the next file.

"JSOC?" Col. Rhodes approached the screen, "Natasha this is highly confidential stuff. You shouldn't be in here."

"What's JSOC?" Steve inquired.

"Joint Special Operations Command. It looks like she was in a multibranch special forces unit that went on and off radar. I can't see who all was in the unit except one…Erik Stevens…?"

Steve raised an eyebrow. Erik Stevens. Where had he heard that name before? He recalled talking to T'challa one day while Bucky was in cryo. Wakanda had been overtaken for a while, by a guy coming from a US JSOC; someone T'challa called… "Killmonger." The words slipped from his mouth.

" _The_ Killmonger?" Sam asked. "I remember hearing about that, but only because we know T'challa personally. What the hell was Cypra doing in the same unit with that guy?"

"She got sent to special forces at _16_?" Peter asked, eyes widening.

"17." Natasha corrected. "She enlisted, went to OCS and they sent her straight there."

"I thought you had to be 18 to enlist?" The teen continued.

"Well, she obviously got legal guardian permission, and then later that year it looks like the State of New York emancipated her." The spy explained.

"Well she was obviously grown enough to go to special forces so…" Col Rhodes sighed.

"Then it looks like the Navy borrowed her for a couple of operations. She's been to Iraq, Afghanistan, Qatar, Djbouti, Pakistan, Singapore, the list goes on."

"The Navy as in…" Sam was getting confused. Usually a person only belonged to one branch. Cypra was in the Air Force, not the Navy.

"SEALs." Nat confirmed. "She's been put on SEAL teams."

It was quiet again.

"Who the fuck _is_ this girl?" Sam blurted after a while.

"A ghost. Just like Barnes was." Natasha sighed. "Hiding in plain sight as a pilot and First Lieutenant."

"She can fly?" Steve said more as a statement than a question.

"She's only 23." Clint argued.

"She's had 6 or 7 years to accomplish this, guys." Col. Rhodes told them. "And if you're proactive then…"

Steve felt a pang of…anger? She didn't lie to him, but to him, withholding the truth was the same thing as lying, but then again, she wasn't obligated to tell him anything, and from the looks of it, she was legally bound to keep her mouth shut.

"This is Nick Fury's niece we're talking about. We knew she was special select for an operation involving Barnes, but I thought that was because of her ties to Nick. I didn't think it was because she had a SF record already." Col. Rhodes explained. "Jesus."

"Does it say anything about the HYDRA operation?" Steve sat up.

"Most of it is redacted, looks like Fury was trying to cover his ass before SHIELD fell." Natasha stated. "All I could get from it was that the military put her on leave for official SHIELD business."

"So Fury was in kahoots with the military?" Sam shifted in his seat.

"He's a colonel himself." Steve told him. "And that's his niece, I'm sure the military was more than happy to cooperate with him on antiterrorism. HYDRA is domestic terrorism."

"What's her kill count?" Peter asked excitedly. "Is it in like, the thousands?"

"We're not going to discuss that. I'm not here to put her in a negative light Peter. You do what you have to when you're in her position." Natasha crossed her arms. "All I'm going to say is that it's more than Barnes and I combined. She went off radar for the last year, but it looks like the year before that one she was doing solo missions under government contract."

"She's an _assassin_?!" Peter jumped out of his chair. "We've been living with an assassin for the last 3 months?"

"Pipe down." Natasha hissed. "Cypra is the youngest, all American female government contract killer in the history of the United States. She's very high profile. I have been a part of the intelligence community since I moved here as a teenager. It wasn't until about 3 or 4 years ago people started discussing her. Nobody seems to know who she is, they just refer to her as 'Alise', or Heilong, which is Mandarin for Black Dragon."

"The tattoo…" Wanda said slowly.

The door flew open, Bucky had a look of panic on his face. He looked up at the monitor and froze. They had figured it out. Goddamn it Natasha.

"How much about her did you know?" Steve asked, tone accusatory. The rest of the team looked blank. "And when were you going to tell us who we were dealing with?"

"Never." Sam scoffed. "They're all the same."

Natasha whipped around, "We keep these things to ourselves for a reason Sam." She scolded. "It's not about creating distrust, it's to keep people safe."

"Well you would know." Sam chided.

"Enough." Steve interjected.

"She's gone." Bucky announced, voice nearing shaky.

"What?" The super soldier stood.

"She's gone. Passport, clothes, vehicle. She turned her phone off and disabled location, I tried. She's gone." Bucky told them again. A wave of unanimous 'oh shit' swept over the team.

"Where would she go? Better yet _why?_ Her dad is in the hospital!" Natasha began to sound panicked herself.

"Maybe she can't _handle_ her dad being in the hospital." Steve jumped to her defense.

Everyone looked at him. He shouldn't have said that.

"I talked to her last night," Steve explained. "She's…" He trailed off remembering her tears, the way she buried her face into his chest, he remembered kissing her and tasting salt. She was broken. Steve was sure of it. Even an assassin couldn't fake emotion like that.

Bucky was confused, he also spoke to her last night, but she was sick…

"I'll bet." Clint sighed. "Even when Cypra was little she couldn't handle loss and failure. Every time she missed a shot she would beat herself up to the point of no return. She's hardwired that way."

"She's also autistic, she doesn't process emotions the way we do." Wanda told them. "I've felt it."

"What is running away going to do about it?" Col Rhodes asked. "They teach you the opposite in the military. We run towards the problem, that's why our flags are patched on with the stripes towards your back."

"She's a logical-mathematical genius." Bruce chimed in. "She's calculative. There's got to be a reason she's doing this."

"We've got to find her." Bucky stated.

"Yeah, what if Mr. Stark wakes up and she's not here? He's going to get so mad." Peter told them.

"Why would he be mad? She _chose_ to leave." Sam crossed his arms. "She's an adult, and a very capable one at that."

"Well if it were me, and I woke up from a coma, and my daughter was nowhere to be found and my team who I call my family did nothing to find her, I'd be pissed." The teen stated.

A few moments of silence passed.

"That was really insightful, Peter." Natasha nodded. "I agree, I think we need to at least look for her. If she doesn't want to be found, then she won't, but we should at least try."

"Count me out, I'm not getting shot or going to jail if we accidentally stick our noses in some covert operation of hers." Sam stood.

"That's a good point." Clint agreed. "What if she got called up?"

"Got called up randomly the night her father got put in the hospital for attempted suicide?" Col. Rhodes shook his head, "Doubt it. These events are linked. And I owe it to Tony as his best friend to try."

"If you guys are going overseas or something, I'm staying here." Bruce sighed. "I can't risk an incident. Tony is usually the one to put out the public relations fires. I don't have the knowledge or the money to do that."

"Can I go?!" Peter asked excitedly, almost bouncing.

"Peter we don't even know where we're going because we don't know where she is." Natasha calmed him. She learned that if she used a soothing voice with the teen, his ADHD would calm a little.

"Barnes, you know her better than any of us. Where do you think she would go?" Wanda asked him.

Bucky thought for a moment. "Natasha is right, if she doesn't want to be found then she won't be, but if she does or doesn't care. She'd probably leave some kind of clue, at least unintentionally."

"So this is a treasure hunt now?" Sam shook his head. "Does she think this is a game?"

"Have some empathy for God's sake Sam." Natasha scolded. She was growing tired of his negativity. "People do irrational things during times of high stress or trauma."

"Yes but as I said before, she's very calculative. She's too smart to be 'irrational." Bruce disagreed.

"Just because she's smart doesn't mean she doesn't have emotions." Steve countered, "When Tony gets upset he does what?"

"Gets shitfaced." Sam scoffed.

"And Cypra was raised by who?" Steve inquired further.

"Tony." Bruce sighed.

"Well there you have it folks." Col Rhodes stood. "FRIDAY check all flights that left New York in the past 8 hours."

"Yes Colonel."

And the search began.

* * *

Cypra had been on the plane for a few hours now. She sat in between a large man and a college student. One was snoring, and one was listening to rap music and chewing gum obnoxiously loud. You could guess who was who. Cypra wasn't going to lie, military transport seemed like a luxury compared to this disgusting public transportation. She had been spoiled. Thanks Air Force.

She missed being in the sky, as a pilot of course. Maybe it was just that she missed being in control the way she was in control of the F22. She put her earphones in and turned some music on, trying to keep her mind present as it kept flashing back to Steve. She longed for the comfort she had felt last night again. She already missed his smell, the coarseness of his beard, his voice. It was always his voice she missed the most. She wanted to be reminded of what his lips felt like again, how he tasted. That was already fading.

' _Present_.' She thought to herself. She should've brought something to read. She found a random audiobook on her phone _'Of Mice and Men'_ she settled to get lost in the deep south. That was fine for now, but what was she going to do when she got to Germany? Where was she going to go then? She remembered she had an account there, some 5,000 euros to start with, she'd figure the rest out later. She made money work for her, not the other way around.

She hoped HYDRA wasn't already on to her, even with her skillset, they were a pain in the ass to deal with especially alone. They came in large numbers usually. She really hoped the government didn't know where she was, she'd be called into questioning immediately. Even though she was granted leave, they kept tabs on her the best they could. They didn't want her out and about in a place they couldn't nab her when needed. They trained her for years, they invested thousands and thousands of dollars into her. With the exception of Steve, she was their pride and joy. The direct result of discipline, and good leadership. They owned her; they could do whatever they wanted with her. They could even kill her if she got out of hand. She wouldn't doubt it if tried.

After all, she was the United States' Winter Soldier.


	13. Chapter 13

**I know, it's been forever, promise I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I had my 2** **nd** **son July 10** **th** **, still struggling with anxiety and depression. Again, don't feel sorry for me, just understand where I'm coming from. Also, I thought Endgame would infinitely complicate this story, but it didn't; in fact, it just made it easier because everything that I thought would happen, did, and everything that I had written pre-Endgame mostly still fits into place, there will be some tweaking but that is ok! Enjoy! M rated themes in here.**

It was seven pm Berlin time, one pm New York time when she landed. She hurried off the aircraft and to a small café. She hastily grabbed her hot coffee from the barista and basically chugged it, despite the warning he issued her. It certainly wasn't Starbucks, but it was enough to do the trick as she cleared the crowds to get out. It was nice not having luggage to wait on, and it was nice to just get out into the air and away from the stuffiness of people. Cypra picked up on bits of conversation, in German, and tried to shut the voices out before the PTSD kicked in. She weaved her way in between crowds of people that were becoming more and more dense as she got closer to the exit. She saw a sign across the street with directions to the massive city library, it was almost a tourist attraction.

 _Quiet conversation in the Berlin city library lulled Cypra back to the security of Bucky's eyes. The green irises and long eyelashes darting around quickly in the pages of the book he was reading, trying to find something, until he stopped and stared at a part of the page._

" _James" She began, "Did you find it?"_

" _I told you not to call me that." He looked up at her._

" _Well what do you want to be called? Bucky?" She inquired._

" _Don't call me that either."_

 _Cypra scoffed. "James it is then." She stood up, "I'm getting some coffee, want some?"_

" _Yes please." He sighed, clearly frustrated at either her, or whatever he was searching for, maybe it was both._

 _Cypra admired his long hair and tired eyes and smiled a little. It was late March, and the night before, it was so cold, Cypra had resorted to climbing into bed with him on the single sized mattress. He awoke with a start and Cypra mumbled an 'I'm freezing.' She wasn't sure if it came out that way because her lips and face were numb, and they didn't have heating in their 1-bedroom safe house._

 _She half expected him to shove her away, but instead he lifted the covers and pulled her petite body into his and covered them back up drowsily. She was instantly warm with his body radiating heat, and breath in her hair. It took her less than 10 minutes to fall back asleep. She was sure he didn't remember it, but still, this was the first time Bucky was openly affectionate to her._

Cypra finally made it outside into the dark, and the cold; and then someone shoved her, and she toppled to the ground, spilling the hot coffee all over herself. She swore and ripped her jacket off, letting the cold air hit her skin through her shirt. Her legs still burned, but not for too much longer.

"Oh my god! I am so sorry, are you okay? Somebody shoved me and I tripped." An American female voice rushed to her aid. Cypra did best to collect her things and stood. She wanted to hit whoever was so careless, until she saw her face. She froze, the other woman froze. "Cypra?"

"Sharon?"

They were quiet for a moment.

"Uh, what are you doing here?" the former Shield agent asked.

Cypra immediately jumped to her own defense. "I don't know, what are _you_ doing here?" She asked irritably.

"I work for the CIA now, joint terrorism task force." Her voice softened at the hostility. "I kind of live here for the time being. Are you on duty?"

Cypra scoffed, "You think I would tell you if I was?" Sharon Carter was always incredibly nosey.

"So no, you're not then." Sharon concluded. Cypra was seething, she always hated how the agent could see through her so easily.

"Look, it was nice catching up with you, I have to go." The assassin picked up her things and headed off in the opposite direction.

Sharon crossed her arms. "Do you even have a place to stay?"

"Sure do." Cypra called back.

"You're lying." Sharon announced.

Cypra whipped around and started back after the blonde. "What do you want with me?" She searched her dark brown eyes for an answer, she knew even if she had walked away from Sharon, the older woman would try to keep tabs on her location anyways. Sharon was one of the best SHIELD had.

"I haven't seen you in like 3 years, we were good friends, and now you're acting all flighty instead of talking to me, which tells me you're probably doing something you shouldn't be doing."

Cypra was dumbfounded. "Good friends? I hated you. I _still_ hate you."

"Yeah, well," Sharon smiled briefly but it was gone as quickly as it had come. "You hate everyone."

That part was mostly true. Unless it was good friends or family, Cypra was negative and indifferent towards them. After losing a few peers on deployment and then losing Bucky, and then Eric, she learned to stop attaching to people. However, she had been ridiculously, disgustingly, emotional these last few months being around Steve, reuniting with HYDRA's most elite, and seeing her father, but that was not the norm.

"Are you afraid I'm going to tell your uncle that you're here?"

"My uncle is dead."

"Oh, so you _do_ know. You went off the grid there for a while. I wasn't sure if you heard." She sighed.

"Still hate him. Hope he's burning in hell." Cypra spat.

Sharon frowned. "What was it that he did to you again?"

"None of your business, look, I have to go." She adjusted her duffel bag straps on her shoulder.

"Well, you're nuts if you think I'm just going to let you wander around out there by yourself."

Cypra locked eyes with her, "Do you not remember me at all?" She squinted. "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

"I know," Her voice was quiet. Cypra could feel her gaze penetrate her defenses. "but I think it would be wiser to stay the night with someone you know, and _kind of_ trust. You can figure it from there." She offered. "I'm going to get some food first though. I am starving." She drew out the last sentence a little, looking off to the side, hair billowing slightly in the wind.

Cypra was hungry also, but she was scared Sharon was going to report her somewhere, to somebody, and then the team would come after her. Were they even looking for her? Bucky probably was. She just wanted to be left alone, she didn't want to be reminded of her dad.

Risks were hard to take when it came to Sharon, she had something about her that made you think she cared about you, something that made you trust her. Cypra absolutely hated how drawn she was to Sharon, and the worst part was, the blonde used her compassion and kindness to keep her hold on you. She hated how freaking _nice_ Sharon was. It was disgusting.

If she didn't accept her offer though, she felt like there would be consequences. Of what kind, Cypra didn't know. It was a gut feeling. Once Sharon locked eyes with her, it was all over, she wouldn't just let Cypra go, and Cypra knew that. Worse, Sharon knew that Cypra knew that also. She was stuck.

After about a minute of silence, Cypra bit the inside of her cheek. "Fine, one night. But you cannot tell _anyone_ Sharon, absolutely _nobody,_ that I am here."

She raised an eyebrow, "That serious huh? Now I'm really curious."

"Sucks, you're not getting anything out of me." Cypra gave her a warning look. "Let's go, I can't be out in the open like this."

Sharon led them quickly to her vehicle. "I hope you like breakfast for dinner."

* * *

The team was in a frenzy, by 10 am, they thought she had left for Singapore. Natasha had called customs, nothing. They called the New York City Airport, posing as law enforcement to see if she had booked any flights. There was nothing on file, no names, no time in. They asked for the security footage, but they couldn't view it without a court-ordered warrant and Natasha couldn't risk hacking them and having it traced back to the facility. They were SOL on the airport. Even more infuriating was that Cypra had wiped the facility camera footage from midnight to five am. She could have left at any point between those times.

"What if she's still in the state?" Sam threw up in conversation as the team huddled around the digital map in the conference room.

"We need to put a BOLO out on her car, Parker do you remember anything about the Tesla? Like a license plate number, or make and model?" Natasha looked over at the teen.

Peter thought back to homecoming night, Cypra had been so drunk she literally just chose the first black car she saw. Then she threw up. Peter shook his head, "No, but was black and shiny."

"Man, do you know how many cars are 'black and shiny." Wilson ridiculed. "This is going to take forever."

Bucky's heart had been racing all morning, he was in full-blown panic mode since discovering her absence. What if last night was the last time he ever saw her? He felt immense guilt knowing she could be out there, possibly pregnant, and alone, but worst of all, hurting. He didn't want her to hurt by herself.

He head to her room for the second time this morning. Gently sifting through her things, he found something in one of her pockets. It was a little strip of paper, with a red line on it. He wasn't sure-

"It's negative." A voice behind him nearly made him jump. Natasha half smiled to comfort him, "I won't tell anyone."

Bucky nodded slightly and returned his eyes to the test. He felt relief, but a hint of sadness. " _Maybe in the future, once things have settled down_."

Together, the two ex-soviet assassins looked for anything they could to find her. Bucky did his best to keep his emotions under control, but after an hour, despair was starting to set in, and he had to leave her room. He nearly walked into Steve on his way out. He must have seen the look in Bucky's eyes. "Everything alright?"

Bucky pulled him to the side, "What were you doing in her room last night?" He asked in a low voice.

"I came up here to check on her after dinner." Steve replied, "She was in pretty bad shape."

"What do you mean 'bad shape?" He questioned further.

"Buck, her dad just attempted-."

"I get that." Bucky snapped irritably.

"No, I don't think you do. Not everyone can shut off their emotions like you." Steve's tone changed from calm to…protective? Bucky was confused, Steve had gone on one 'date' with her and now he was being defensive? He wasn't even like that with Natasha, and Steve cared deeply for her.

"She can, she just chose not to with you, which is interesting because when I met Cypra it took a little while for her to even smile at me, much less cry in front of me." He explained.

Steve was silent.

"What happened?"

"Nothing." Steve lied. "I told you, I just went in to check on her. She was upset, and then she kicked me out after a while."

Bucky didn't believe that for a second, it was rare for her to form emotional attachments so quickly, and then the break up happened…maybe he should be asking Cypra instead. "Did she hint about leaving?"

"Nothing." Steve shook his head. "I promise you Buck, if I had even an inkling she was going to take off, or I knew where she was, I would tell you. I'm worried about her too."

Bucky read the sincerity in his friend's eyes; he was telling the truth. Bucky felt guilty for being so accusatory, but something just wasn't sitting right. "Alright." He nodded and headed for the kitchen. He was starving.

Cypra shoved pancakes into her mouth while checking the weather on her phone, using the diner's Wi-Fi. Rain was on the horizon. She felt a sense of comfort being here, but that was quickly overtaken when she felt a pair of eyes on her. She looked up. Sharon hadn't touched her food yet, instead she was staring at Cypra with those concern laced brown eyes.

"What?" Cypra asked irritably with a mouth half full of food.

"How long has it been since you've eaten?"

Cypra didn't want to think about it. She shrugged. "A while, but I'm fine." She stuffed more pancakes into her mouth.

"Well slow down, you're going to choke." Sharon took a bite of her eggs.

Cypra swallowed. "Whatever you say, mom." She replied sarcastically and looked back down at her phone.

Sharon pushed a breath through her nose. Why was she always so difficult?

" _I'm fine." She grunted as she stood, blood and dirt glazing her face._

 _Sharon's hands were shaking, as she was clutching her gun. "Cypra," her voice was trembling a little too._

" _I know, come on." The assassin grabbed her hand and looked into the agent's eyes, Cypra had never seen her so scared before._

" _No, you're hurt." Sharon countered._

" _I'm fine, mother, I'll make it." The 19-year-old assured her, applying pressure to her side; she had been shot. "Let's go, we don't have a lot of time."_

Sharon came back to the present. What had happened all these years later?

Cypra was quiet on the ride home, Sharon thought she saw a glimmer of a tear in her ex-colleague's eye, but she wasn't sure. In a desperate attempt to ease the tension she asked. "So are you seeing anyone?"

Cypra furrowed her brows, "Like what? A guy? No." She was irritated with that question; she didn't want to start thinking about Bucky and her lack of being pregnant. That would ultimately spiral to her thinking about her dad again and she knew she couldn't handle that. "Are _you_?"

"Oh, no…' She trailed off.

"I figured, you know, since you and Captain Rogers didn't work out." Cypra yawned and put her feet up.

"How do you know about that?!" Sharon snapped, almost angrily.

"Oh, I know about everything, sweetie. It's my job." The 23-year-old smirked.

The blonde seethed at the word 'sweetie', she hated how condescending Cypra made it sound, and Sharon was older than her, like a whole 5 years older.

The apartment was small, a studio, just like the ones in NYC with scaled grey concrete flooring. The kitchen was to the right, a cozy area with a small island and black granite countertops. The silver fridge stuck out beside the chrome sink. Little gold pendant lamps hung from the ceiling, illuminating the small space. To the left was the bedroom and door to the single bathroom. The bed lay up against the brick wall with string lights strung out overhead, a black nightstand was decorated with a table lamp and a book. These two rooms were sandwiched between a living room area with a couch and mounted TV.

"Nice place." Cypra put her bag down by the door. "I'll sleep on the couch."

"Oh…no, you don't want to do that. My cat pees on it." Sharon shook her head. A soft meow came out from underneath the piece of furniture, and then a calico colored feline emerged and meowed again at the sight of the new visitor. "Sorry."

Cypra sighed at the little culprit, she already hated him. "Okay, well I'll sleep on the floor then." She had no disputes, hard or soft ground, if you were tired enough you would sleep. During combat deployments, sleep was a luxury anyways.

"You're not sleeping on the floor." Sharon protested, "the bed is a queen, you can sleep with me." She set off to change the sheets.

Cypra was starting to regret coming over here; she didn't like Sharon enough to even want to be in the same room as her, much less the same bed.

' _You did this to yourself, Cypra'_ The young woman's mind echoed to her, she put her bag down and went to help the agent with the sheets. She supposed that was the least she could do.

"Thanks," Sharon moved to the kitchen. "Do you want some tea? You can throw your clothes in the wash; coffee will stain." She pointed to the bathroom.

"Uh, I'm not much of a tea drinker." Cypra told her, she took her jacket off it reeked of airline cocktails and Colombian roast.

"I don't know, you might like this one, it's blueberry hibiscus." Sharon prepared her Keurig brewer.

"What the hell is _'hibiscus_ '?" Cypra furrowed her brows in a combination of confusion and unfamiliarity.

"Just try it. It'll help you wind down for bed." Sharon looked back at her with an exasperated tone. Why, oh why, was that girl so picky? "Did you know they have a hibiscus flower called 'Rose of Sharon?" She beamed. "It can be blue, pink, red, lavender, purple, or white, depending on the variety. It's very indecisive."

"Wow that really is your flower Sharon! Does it have trouble finding a man too?"

"You're a bitch." Sharon stated.

Cypra smiled, the first one almost all day. She didn't need to be told. "How do I start the washer?"

"Just leave it in the hamper, I'll get it." Gentle clattering of ceramic mugs filled the air as Sharon pulled them down from the shelf above the countertops.

"You sure?"

"Cypra you need to rest, I don't know exactly what all has happened to you today but I can tell you're worn out." The older woman set a mug in the small space provided by the brewer.

It was that obvious huh? Cypra knew arguing would make it worse so she mumbled a thank you and followed directions. "Can I take a shower?" She asked when she returned.

"Of course." Sharon looked at her funny. "You don't have to ask." Cypra never asked for things in the past, if you invited her into your home she'd just assume your things were her things. This was an odd change. "Towels are under the sink."

* * *

Steve was fuming as he stood, looking out the window from the living space, his panic had turned into anger. Why would she just take off like that and not tell anyone? Was she mad at him? Steve didn't like to beat around the bush, if you were upset with him, just talk to him. What was he supposed to tell Tony? The last time the engineer had seen his daughter was with him. Steve felt solely responsible for this whole shit storm that was raging. He should have kept his hands to himself…both times. "Natasha, I don't have time for you to be nosey." He snapped at the redhead who evidently still thought she could sneak up on him.

"Relax Rogers, I was just here to tell you that dinner was ready." Natasha said slowly. Something was not at all right with the soldier. "But now that you're being so defensive-"

"-Just...stay out of my head please-" He cut her off. He then sighed; why on earth did he even say anything? She was _definitely_ suspicious of him now. "I'll be there in a minute." He softened his tone.

Natasha made her way back into the kitchen and bumped into Bucky accidentally as he was making his way towards Steve. She saw the opportunity and took it, "What's wrong with him?"

"He probably blames himself." Bucky told her.

"So do you, and you're not acting like that." Nat shook her head. "He seems…"

"Guilty?"

The Black Widow and The Winter Soldier locked eyes for a moment.

"I'm going to find out why." The redhead half-whispered.

"Then we're on the same mission." Bucky squeezed her shoulder. "Keep me posted."

"You do the same." She nodded, and they parted ways.

The meal was dampened, once again, by sudden unfortunate events.

"What if we never find her?" Peter swirled his spaghetti with his fork.

"We'll find her Peter." Natasha reassured.

"How? Finding an actual ghost is easier than finding her. She's a master at what she does." Sam argued.

"What if he dies?" Peter asked to the group.

Silence.

"Then we'll cross that bridge if we get there." Steve entered the room. "Let's not give up hope yet."

"I knew I should have read her before she went to bed." Wanda began. "I might have been able to stop her from going."

"If she was even planning on leaving." Bucky added. "Cypra is the queen of spontaneity. It used to piss me off when we were in Berlin because she wouldn't follow directions, or she would but it would be _her_ way."

"She sounds difficult to operate with." Sam observed.

"Very." Bucky agreed. "But that's what makes her, her."

"Have we told Pepper about this?" Vison sat still in his chair.

"I was avoiding it." Natasha admitted.

"She needs to know." Col Rhodes told her. "Cypra is basically her child too."

"I know, I guess I assumed we'd have some sort of clue by now." Natasha was infuriated by the lack of leads, and how well Cypra had covered everything up; the way she slipped away silently.

Pepper was going to be devastated. First Tony, now Cypra. Nobody was looking forward to this.

* * *

Cypra couldn't stop the tears from coming as she let the warm water hit her skin. She supposed it was better to let them out now than in front of Sharon like she almost did in the car. The hospital had yet to call her, her dads condition must have stayed the same. No brain activity? What would happen if he ever did wake up? Would he be the same? Would he still be a genius? Would he even remember her? Or himself? His team? Cypra felt an ungodly craving for alcohol, she knew it was because her dopamine was depleted, and she knew that alcohol was NOT the way to fix that, yet she craved it anyways.

She decided to do something else instead, she attempted to recreate the touch she so craved from the assassin. She closed her eyes and leaned against the wall, thinking back to the day he pushed her into his bedroom. His mouth against hers and the way his fingers were so gentle. She missed his strength; she couldn't push or pull away from him even if she wanted to. Her body finally released as she remembered the want in those green eyes of his. Endorphins filled her brain and relaxed her body. Suddenly the green eyes turned to blue and the imaginary strength pushing her against the wall turned into a gentle embrace. Cypra gasped and slid to the shower floor, suddenly unable to catch her breath. She aspirated some water droplets coming from the shower stream and began to cough. A pins and needles sensation engulfed her body; she began trembling, and then, eventually crying again. Great, now she couldn't even please herself without having an attack. Fantastic.

There was a loud knock. "Are you ok?" Sharon must have heard her coughing.

"I'm fine!" Cypra yelled over the water, "I'll be out in a sec."

Truthfully, she never wanted to leave the water's warm embrace.


End file.
